I always have to google the name of this website, because I always put the words in the wrong consecution.

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when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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Assume that on another planet or galaxy there are people just like humans that look exactly like me. Like an alternate universe.

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

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having cool friends, but all their other friends are nerds.

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Help my dogs eat their dinner....I think the whole time, "If they only had thumbs".....

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On YouTube, if someone comments a time in the video (or in the description) I always click it for fun, even if it doesn't work. Like if someone comments "it's 4:12 right now" on a 2 minute video I click the link.

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

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IM 13 years old when i touch something i have a feeling and wont let me do anything until i touch it again or 4 times or sometimes even 16 times i cant live like this its weird!!!!

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When I am in a car i always think there is massive swords coming out the edge of the car and make everything the same length up

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masturbate... with condoms and gloves because male genitalia is gross and clean up takes just a few seconds rather than minutes

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oh snap, i got a boner. hope nobody notices

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Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

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I always thought Diane Ross sang '76 why don't ya babe, get out my life why don't ya babe'.

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My goal is to get as much as possible thumbs down at this post.

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Pretending you don't know that much about something because other people might think it would be wierd if you did. Ex: if you you knew someone's exact birthdate and you were discussing it with some one and you where like ya he looks a little older he's probably in his mid 40s or early 50s instead of just admitting you know there exact age.

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I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

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Laying or sitting down in a really comfy position, then getting up to do something, and when you come back you can't figure out the position you just had.

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Meet a really cool girl imagine the rest of my life with her.

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Legally changing your name to Peter Jankins just cuz

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When I see someones comment has alot of dislikes , I add on to it .

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.