Leftovers are better than the actual meal ;)

Open blinds when taking a poop to look outside, then realize that someone could be watching you.

creating your own personal perfect partner in romance or frendship, almost like a imaginary friend (but you don't speak to them out loud)

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

coughing when your having a poo so people know that your on the loo

Wondering where are famous people and what they are doing at this exact moment.

slow down in front of automatic doors thinking they won't open and then rushing through when they do so you don't look stupid

pretend celebrities are watching you then getting really freaked out.

Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

whenever im getting a haircut, i feel as if the barber can see my embarrassing and private thoughts.

I like to sleep on the floor; my my cushion is too soft.

Check your analog watch, wait for it to strike a minute, then look away and try to count 60 seconds out in your head before you look again. However many seconds you were away is your new record.

Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

I replace every word of a song with the name of my pet

Saying or doing something stupid, then later replaying it in your head and wanting to punch yourself in the face for it, then coming up with different ideas on how you could have been less stupid. -B

I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

I use my phone's auto-correct to make sure the words I'm writing are correct.

Am I not the one who created an imaginary BAE?

When I am listening to my ipod in the car or on a bus, i always remove an earphone to check if i am breathing really loudly.

use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.