Tried to suck ur own penis

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jack off

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Hate using public bathrooms because everyone can hear you pee.

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Whenever I look in the bathroom mirror, I fear that I will see a terrible bloody monster standing behind me. I convince myself of this so completely that I panic and rush out right after I pee.

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Blow dry my dick and balls after getting out of the shower.

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When I stop thinking about about something it'll turn out that I've been staring at someone without meaning to.

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Surfing nsfw subreddit at work

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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Roll my eyes with them closed when I am annoyed with someone

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get insulted when lazy people cheer you to work hard

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When in a public bathroom, flush the toilet right before your shit falls into the water, so no one will hear.

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Count how long it takes before you stop peeing.

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Dancing while hoovering

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Wheneveri brush my teeth, I make a snarling face.

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When walking along, I try to race someone walking towards me. For example, a letter box is ahead of me and there is someone walking towards me. I will try and reach the letter box before the other person without looking awkward.. then feel like God if I manage to do it.

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Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

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Playing TV in bed because if I don't I jump at every noise in the house and don't sleep.

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Sometimes when I'm sitting still I visualize myself being able to move myself using my mind.

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I wonder if a blind person knows how colors look?

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Start browsing a list of pics at the back, so I can see the order they were posted.

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When I woke up this morning I was asleep.

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pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out

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When I see someone I know walking toward me as I'm walking toward them from a long way away, I pretend I don't see them until we're right on top of each other, then, miraculously discovering them, I smile and say, "Hi".

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Wanting something so much. Getting it then wondering what to do next

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.