If I'm home alone, I tell myself good night when I am getting cozy in bed. I even use my name.

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Realizes there is less toilet paper than first thought. Hobbles across bathroom to find more. Failure. Take shower.

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When I see someones comment has alot of dislikes , I add on to it .

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I have an unhealthy obsession with and so always talk about Penge North Korea beige mauve and medium density fiberboard. This explains why I'm such a popular guy

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Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

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imagine a bunch of girls are watching you at home, so you don't look like a dumbass

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

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Make a screeching noise with my mouth as I go around corners in my car too fast.

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When people are walking behind me I automatically think they are staring at my ass and get self-conscious.

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Okay, so. I have this weird habit I've had for like a year now, and it's that I always have to touch things an even amount of times and touch them with the other had the same amount of times. I read it's OCD, which I sometimes experience symptoms of, but this one sticks out. Is this normal? What should I do? Should I ask if I do have OCD?

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when i'm at the computer i say out of loud what i'm typing

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fall asleep in the shower.

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go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

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get under the covers and curl up into a ball to get warm really fast

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I feel like I'm superman every time I run by the counter in the kitchen and the papers on it go flying off.

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i run my 2 fingers across a wall like they're ninja feet when im happy.

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Think a really Fu**ed up thought in your head, and then get mad at your brain for even coming up with it, and finally trying to think really nice thoughts to make up for it.

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Mayada stupid

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I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

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i always think people can hear my thoughts.

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Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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Whenever I go to a new place, I look around and carefully plan my escape route in case of zombies.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.