Not doing any work Feel guilty about it Then still do no work

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pissing really fast to remove shit stains in the toilet

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I turn on the faucet or turn up the radio in the bathroom so maybe no one can hear me pee.

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I hate when my mom hangs my underwear on the clothesline outside.

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Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

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when i pass a grave yard, i am compelled to hold my breath

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Read and laugh at about any top comment here... because it happens to me too.

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Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

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Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

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on hot summer days when I exit the shower I only dry off my legs to the point where they aren't dripping but my leg hair is still wet.

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I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

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Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

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Fantasize about being with somebody else when I have sex

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"I'll start tomorrow..." wake up and it has been a year later and I still haven't done it.

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Check your analog watch, wait for it to strike a minute, then look away and try to count 60 seconds out in your head before you look again. However many seconds you were away is your new record.

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I am always SO sure the metal detector or store alarms will go off when I walk through them. –Ikka

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eat chicken, lamb anything with bones with a knife and fork while avoiding using your hands because it makes them dirty

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When you sit down to a great dinner with all your favorite foods and then the nanosecond your ass touches the chair you are instantly he most tired and uninterested in food than you have ever been before

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People looking at me when listening to my Ipod. "Can they hear my music?" *turn volume down*

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when i watch tv and it cuts to break, if i hear someone on the tv tell me not to change the chanel, ill say "u cant tell me what to do!" and then ill change it.

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When someone is reading something out loud in class...and they are reading REALLY slow...You quietly read fast and you try to beat them to the end of the paragraph

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I can't brush my teeth with the toilet lid up.

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if I see submissions above mine get thumbs up but not mine I will put them down

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Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.