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I wet toilet paper before I use it to wipe.
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+1,988
When someome asks you a question and you can't hear them so you say, "what?", then they say it again and you miss it so you just nod your head and say "yeah".
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+2,887
Try to balance the light switch between on and off.
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+1,882
smell your socks cause you like the smell of your own sweat
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+2,717
Have a fantasy where Jesus Christ is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole with a lawn dart while Garth Brooks gives birth to something resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum.
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-50
Whenever I am in a conversation with someone, be it a family member, close friend, or stranger, I nearly always imagine either starting a random brawl with them for no reason (i.e. punching them in the face) or making out with them or something, neither of which I would ever consider doing. Am I alone?
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+175
I always save a bite of my favorite food for last so that is the taste I have in my mouth when the meal is over.
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+1,683
pee in my pants on purpose for the fun of it
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+920
pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out
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+1,582
I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.
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-52
Made after doomsday plans
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-36
Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt
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-23
Go through a bunch of the boxes with the messed up letters (The ones making sure your not a robot) trying to find one you like. Then, click the refresh button and realize that the last one might have been the best one you were going to get.
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-77
When on a long car ride, i tend to look out the window and imagine that i am running on the side of the car and doing flips and other types of parkour to keep up with my car...
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-17
Reading the things people post on here and realising your not as weird as you thought.
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+316
Popping your finger in your bellybutton, and then smelling it. You secretly like the cheesy smell.
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+1,484
When leaving your basement, become increasingly conscious of how you are scared of something getting you. SPRINT UP STAIRS.
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+2,508
When walking on the sidewalk, try to walk the same number of steps on each square without looking awkward. (now, this is sooo weird, I have no clue if ANYBODY has ever done this more than once)
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+1,649
While spending the night drinking with my spouse at home, i put a diaper on so i don't have to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. I also change it for a fresh one when i go to bed.
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+1,932
Whenever i hear myself in a video or something to me, it sounds way higher pitched than when I hear myself talking Is it just me?
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+1,408
When I'm over at my friends house and they get in a fight with their sibling, I just pet their dog.
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-783
When I'm hungry I look in the fridge, but there's nothing good to eat so I shut the door and walk away. Then I look in the fridge again 10 seconds later in the hope that new food has arrived Robbie
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+1,596
Watching a movie with bugs in it and instantly feeling that shivery 'holy sh*t there are bugs on me' feeling.
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-30
I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.
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-68
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.