Never tell her who I was talking to on the phone and watch her nosy butt get upset

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Tried to stuff yourself in the fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Whenever I Iook into the mirror, I think there's a second evil dimension.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Coughing really loud to cover up the sound of your fart, then shitting your pants.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

wear warm clothes on hot days -jesse

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

when I have to shred important documents I am still not satisfied that I even burn the shredded paper

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Try to acomplish getting the rest of your meal reaady before the microwave timer goes off.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Try to stop a stopwatch exactly on 1 second with no extra milliseconds

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

thumb_up thumb_down -5

When eating food leave back the food u like the most for last

thumb_up thumb_down -101

Make scary faces in the mirror and try to scare myself

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Flexing your abs when you put on deodorant so you dont look fat

thumb_up thumb_down -41

When I'm hungry I look in the fridge, but there's nothing good to eat so I shut the door and walk away. Then I look in the fridge again 10 seconds later in the hope that new food has arrived Robbie

thumb_up thumb_down +1,634

sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Praying to God even though you tell people you're an Atheist.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Teacher asks class a question, so I put my head down and pretend to take notes.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Wish you could delete a post if it gets thumbs down

thumb_up thumb_down -64

When I see a post on this site with a single downvote I start to feel guilty and give the person an upvote because I feel sorry for them.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

When making toast, I stop the toaster halfway and flip the toast like it's sunbathing.

thumb_up thumb_down -68

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.