When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

Go on this site to feel normal.

Cross the street or go some other way to avoid the awkward moment of long lasting side by side walking (a move known as the 'overtake') when walking right behind someone who is slightly slower than you.

Say 'she's not here' when someone that I don't know calls and asks for me.

stop the microwave when I hear the food popping

get really embarrassed when i leave the book i read when i poop on the bathroom counter and someone uses the bathroom.

I always feel like i have to eat something while watching a movie that I've seen so many times.

Sometimes I have a dream in the morning that I checked my clock but then when I wake up Im perplexed when Ive gone back in time -Ethan

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

hate Justin Bieber

Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

Flexing your abs when you put on deodorant so you dont look fat

Smell my fingers after I pick u pennies or unlock the door with my keys!

Smile like a damn dork when I watch romantic movies.

I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

I randomly highlight stuff when I'm reading something, only to click outside of the text so I can actually read it.

When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

wish you looked like either Kellan Lutz or Bradley Cooper! I wish magic existed now.

Stalk boyfriend's facebook, go to everything he's commented on, and comment too.

try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.