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pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out
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+1,559
I stick one foot out of my blanket so I'm not hot or cold.
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-133
When I'm in a place with two different colored tiles, I only step on the colored ones and pretend the white ones are lava or off-limits.
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+1,949
I think about life problems in the shower
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+2,426
Walk around aimlessly when talking on the phone.
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+1,824
When I'm about to get in bed, I turn my light off and then run and jump into bed so that nothing gets me.
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+924
When someome asks you a question and you can't hear them so you say, "what?", then they say it again and you miss it so you just nod your head and say "yeah".
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+2,864
While spending the night drinking with my spouse at home, i put a diaper on so i don't have to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. I also change it for a fresh one when i go to bed.
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+1,936
I wet toilet paper before I use it to wipe.
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+2,030
smell your socks cause you like the smell of your own sweat
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+2,751
Sometimes I read a whole page of text only to realize I didn't actually read any of it. Then I read it again. Sometimes this happens more than 3 times for one page.
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+2,713
Having a dream where I am in a sex Ed class and instead of looking at slides experiencing everything firsthand
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-84
Instead of using the twist ties on bread, I spin the bag of bread and then tuck the flap underneath.
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+2,753
After learning a new word, I hear it used and written EVERYWHERE for the next week.
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+2,187
I always save a bite of my favorite food for last so that is the taste I have in my mouth when the meal is over.
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+1,699
When I see interactive ads on webpages ( "Shoot 5 iPhones And Get One Free!" type of windows ), I feel compelled to finish the task, even though I KNOW it's going to open a pop-up and waste 10 seconds of my life.
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+240
People looking at me when listening to my Ipod. "Can they hear my music?" *turn volume down*
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+1,763
When leaving your basement, become increasingly conscious of how you are scared of something getting you. SPRINT UP STAIRS.
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+2,508
Lie in bed at night, imagining things I want to happen in my life while trying to fall asleep.
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+1,893
pee in the side of the toilet so its not as loud.
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+2,754
I Masturbate Daily.
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-56
Wonder if I have a twin across the world and he makes all the opposite decisions.
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+7
If I'm in my room and I need to fart, I walk into someone else's room and fart in there so that my room doesn't stink up.
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-54
while taking a bath, I imagine my knees, belly, arms etc poking out of the water are islands, and i imagine little people running around on them
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-31
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.