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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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Whenever I walk through automatic doors I say "Thank You"

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when baking cookies I eat waaayyy too much of the dough, to the point that I don't even want any of the cookies when I am finished baking them.

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repeat what you just said 2 seconds ago in a group conversation thinking no one heard you

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you wonder if things look the same through other peoples eyes

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Imagine that other people see colors different from me and if i had their brain i would see it like them

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I hold my boobs if I'm running upstairs and not wearing a bra.

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I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

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I got a lot of high rated entries, but they dont contain Moral: This.

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Popping your finger in your bellybutton, and then smelling it. You secretly like the cheesy smell.

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sitting in your room at night and making imagineary monters or random figures out of things in your room.

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When I use the bathroom at school, I keep the door open with the kickstand and use the stall. It's because I fear that one day, when I'm all alone in the bathroom with the door closed, the fire alarm will go off and scare the living crap out of me. This trick backfires when someone comes in without closing the door and uses the urinal.

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Read what other people do that you don't, and think how weird that person must be.

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Having leg bounce up and down for no reason at all.

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flushing the toilet eventho not yet finish pee-ing. So that the water sucks it right after the last drop of your pee. Saves 2-3seconds of your life.

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no magazine on toilet? read shampoo bottle

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I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

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Whenever I accidentally drop a glass or cup it always bounces the first time but breaks the second

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Only one tissue left in the box... I'll just use toilet paper.

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Sometimes I unintentionally mouth the words being spoken on TV.

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while talking about someone, immediately fear they are somehow listening

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Get extremly pissed off when everyone on youtube thinks that only guys use the website and call you "dude" , "bro" or "sir" when they respond to a comment you posted -_-

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.