after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

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Imagine yourself and friends as band members while listening to songs.

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Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

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When I watch a movie that terrifies me, I usually find myself sitting on the sofa with a kitchen knife in my hand at the end of the movie.

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When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

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Right after moving to a new place I check my room for hidden cameras.

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Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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during texting you set your phone in your lap right before a car is about to pass you so they dont see you texting and driving

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When in shower, I turn the heat to max for a few minutes to warm up the whole bathroom.

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Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

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whale sperm

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k. everyone

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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When I'm about to go to the bathroom, I think of a million things that I have to do and try to do them all before I pee my pants.

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Hate using public bathrooms because everyone can hear you pee.

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when im losing an argument, ill start singing my responses

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Wondering what would happen if you did something super random or inappropriate in a group setting. :)

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At the gym, I always try to do 5 pounds more than the previous person.

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Put on different accents, ad talk to my self in the mirror.

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Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

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When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

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Pour cereal. Realize there is no milk. You really want cereal so you try it with water. Realize that was a bad idea.

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When I pee if there is already some toilet paper there I try to sink it with my pee.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.