I am convinced that nobody had opened bacon or packets of ham with the flappy corner because it dosnt work!! So i get a knife and saw it out.

I flick my boogers on the carpet knowing that I can just vacuum them up later.

I'm constantly struck with this odd sensation that I didn't wipe my ass well enough.

Someone waves at me and I wave back...and then I realize they were waving at someone behind me.

Think something that you REALLY don't want to think and hurriedly force your mind to change its thoughts.

I trap my farts under the covers and sniff them all up or cup them in my hand and sniff real hard to get the smell.

When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

When your sitting on the toilet you watch a video,or read something on your ipod/ipad/etc

No matter how complicated your shower is at home, you always find it much easier to work than other people's showers.

Automatically lie to your dentist when they ask if you floss

Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

Showering with my uncle Jarrett <3

When sitting on the pot I whip and then I feel like I have to crap again.

You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

I laugh easier when im with someone

tell everyone that you think that mcdonalds is unhealthy and that you think there food is nasty but in reality you actually love it.

Start to do homework online, end up on facebook :/

When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

Sometimes I think that I'm a character in The Sims 3 and someone is controlling everything I do.

Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'whores-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

I always open up another tab on my browser, just in case I accidentally exit, so my computer can warn me that I will close 2 tabs.

Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

place all your achievements in your room to impress your friends

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.