I hug-squeeze the bread to get all the air out before putting it away.

Realising that there are ASSHOLES posting dumb shit on this site.

When changing the volume one my computer it has to be a multiple of 2

I stop the microwave at 1 second so that one someone else uses it it beeps

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

When I'm home alone, I pretend I'm famous, and pretend I'm doing a television or magazine interview, and answer out loud to questions I ask in my head

Think that everything has feelings for example, a cushion or a tree

I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

Turn on the faucet and/or fan when using the toilet at someone else's house or at my own place when there is a visitor because I don't want them to hear me peeing.

Try to stop a stopwatch exactly on 1 second with no extra milliseconds

Sometimes I pee sitting down and act like i'm a girl.

I like to create stories and adventures in my head to make reality a little less boring...

Feels my beard with my tongue.

Having cool food in your house and knowing your boyfriend is going to call you around 6 or so, so you start eating said awesome food at about 5:57. That way when your boyfriend asks what you're doing to can tell him you're eating _____ and he'll want to come over.

Any time I shop for used clothes, I always have to ask, “Did anybody die in this?” –Ikka

Liking the smell of your fart and Poo and denying it to people.

When they say the name of the movie in the movie i get excited o.O

when going to get a drink, i accidently pull out a bowl, or plate, later realizing what i did, i put it back, and get a cup

Always check the other side of the shower curtain when showering out of fear that someone is on the other side

I like to have a picture of my crush on my computer screen, and will walk around a room while he 'looks at me'.

Hate to type Morals under each one of my posts Moral: A small chick in the hand is better than a huge C**K up your ass. I am pretty sure not even women nor homosexuals want birds up there...Then again, I havent searched for anything like that at the intern... they are eating her! And now they are gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! (fly stuck on head)

imagine squeezing your bladder in your hand when your peeing.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.