Being fat

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Read something strange and funny that you don't actually do, then say: "whaat?" And lough and everyone around you just look at you not knowing why you're talking to yourself an laughing.

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When I'm cooking, I mumble everything I'm doing under my breath like I'm in a cooking show and I'm talking to the audience.

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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When i'm done sleeping, I wake up.

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Sometimes I walk around town and watch peoples TVs through their windows. When they see me and confront me, I try to get a conversation about the show going.

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I hate when people say for example,if something is $3.99 they say its four dollars.

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Wondering where are famous people and what they are doing at this exact moment.

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When its nighttime, you walk around the house with one of your small animals in your arms, like it can protect you from anything

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Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

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Yell at game shows when the people are stupid

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Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

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Picking your nose to get rid of that annoying whistling in your nose when you breathe.

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When I tell human garbage that I am the Fallen Angel, they laugh at me, then I make them spontaneously combust. Moral: What moral whore?

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pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out

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Think it's awesome when I look at a clock and it reads the same numbers that my address starts with.

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I flick my boogers on the carpet knowing that I can just vacuum them up later.

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Being afraid to up-vote the embarrassing posts on this page for fear that it might somehow post onto my Facebook.

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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Wonder if certain people can read my mind... start thinking weird stuff and try to stop.

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Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.