rub the underside of your ear lobe to smell the odd smell.

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Have to take the phone with you everytime to the bathroom

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Thinking about what other poeple are doing right now... Like someone solving world hunger and your sitting there playing games and having fun with friends that are nice and healthy.

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I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

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after dialing a number and clicking "call" constanly rehearse what your going to say when the other person picks up the line

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When you start wondering if you're in a dream and suddenly feel trapped

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Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

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when I get a really good idea, I write notes in excruciating detail, as I believe my brilliance will quickly disappear and I will have no idea what I was writing about ..

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

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in my mind, traffic cones are called VLC.

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dont wash hands for the recommended 30 seconds

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I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

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When i take off my watch before i go to sleep i smell my wrist.

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I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

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I very carefully smell what I'm about to eat before I eat it, but I'd most likely eat it, even if I hadn't smelled it first.

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Have a big twitch, freak out when you are dosing off in class but suddenly wake up.

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I have a phobia of incest

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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tell everyone that you think that mcdonalds is unhealthy and that you think there food is nasty but in reality you actually love it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.