I hug-squeeze the bread to get all the air out before putting it away.

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Realising that there are ASSHOLES posting dumb shit on this site.

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When changing the volume one my computer it has to be a multiple of 2

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I stop the microwave at 1 second so that one someone else uses it it beeps

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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Not vote up my own posts? I bet I'm among the few..

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Glance at your friend beside you, smile to yourself, and think, "I could murder them."

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When I'm home alone, I pretend I'm famous, and pretend I'm doing a television or magazine interview, and answer out loud to questions I ask in my head

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Think that everything has feelings for example, a cushion or a tree

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I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

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Turn on the faucet and/or fan when using the toilet at someone else's house or at my own place when there is a visitor because I don't want them to hear me peeing.

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Try to stop a stopwatch exactly on 1 second with no extra milliseconds

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Sometimes I pee sitting down and act like i'm a girl.

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I like to create stories and adventures in my head to make reality a little less boring...

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Feels my beard with my tongue.

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Having cool food in your house and knowing your boyfriend is going to call you around 6 or so, so you start eating said awesome food at about 5:57. That way when your boyfriend asks what you're doing to can tell him you're eating _____ and he'll want to come over.

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Any time I shop for used clothes, I always have to ask, “Did anybody die in this?” –Ikka

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Liking the smell of your fart and Poo and denying it to people.

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When they say the name of the movie in the movie i get excited o.O

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when going to get a drink, i accidently pull out a bowl, or plate, later realizing what i did, i put it back, and get a cup

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Always check the other side of the shower curtain when showering out of fear that someone is on the other side

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I like to have a picture of my crush on my computer screen, and will walk around a room while he 'looks at me'.

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Hate to type Morals under each one of my posts Moral: A small chick in the hand is better than a huge C**K up your ass. I am pretty sure not even women nor homosexuals want birds up there...Then again, I havent searched for anything like that at the intern... they are eating her! And now they are gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! (fly stuck on head)

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imagine squeezing your bladder in your hand when your peeing.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.