While spending the night drinking with my spouse at home, i put a diaper on so i don't have to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. I also change it for a fresh one when i go to bed.

After learning a new word, I hear it used and written EVERYWHERE for the next week.

pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out

I wet toilet paper before I use it to wipe.

Whenever i hear myself in a video or something to me, it sounds way higher pitched than when I hear myself talking Is it just me?

When I'm in a place with two different colored tiles, I only step on the colored ones and pretend the white ones are lava or off-limits.

smell your socks cause you like the smell of your own sweat

This song will not come out of my head!

Walk around aimlessly when talking on the phone.

Spending the night at someone's house and waking up and thinking your at your house then realizing your not

Instead of using the twist ties on bread, I spin the bag of bread and then tuck the flap underneath.

When I'm about to get in bed, I turn my light off and then run and jump into bed so that nothing gets me.

When leaving your basement, become increasingly conscious of how you are scared of something getting you. SPRINT UP STAIRS.

When someome asks you a question and you can't hear them so you say, "what?", then they say it again and you miss it so you just nod your head and say "yeah".

When I'm over at my friends house and they get in a fight with their sibling, I just pet their dog.

Reach my hand inside the room to turn the light on before I go in.

Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

pee in my pants on purpose for the fun of it

Get random feelings of nausea and/or dizziness for no apparent reason.

The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

I like to think I'm a Lion or cat.

Stop at traffic lights thinking it will close soon, when actually remains only 5s to close second and u run like crazy.

In the shower, or just when I'm alone, I imagine having confrontations with people in my life and play out the entire conversation by myself, lip syncing the words with emotions and all.

Instead of reading the sunday comics, I read the nutrition facts on the cereal box.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.