Lie in bed at night, imagining things I want to happen in my life while trying to fall asleep.

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sometimes when i see a cop cruising around i try and act suspicious to see if they pull me over.

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I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

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When I remember something embarrassing I did or even something someone else did, I will yell random words. It started just with gasping but now I have like 5 words that I'll say randomly. It's evolved to include stressful or disturbing thoughts and not just embarrassing things. I have a pretty stressful life so I'm basically continuously making random sounds then looking around terrified that someone's heard.

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When telemarketers call I speak Afrikaans to them until they hang up

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Sometimes I wonder if my whole life is a hallucination and I'm actually in some padded room somewhere, talking to myself and staring into space while my real family mourns the fact that their daughter will never be able to live a real life...

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It's hot but I still have on covers

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I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

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did you notice if you travel: when your going to the place feels like 10 hours but when going home feels like 4 hours

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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looking at the bottom when i meet foreigners talking among themselves... dang. no subtitles.

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look at bins as i walk past them

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Saying "ow" even though whatever happened did not actually hurt, but you thought that it would.

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DAS RITE MODERFOCKER! NOWUN MESSIS WIF FIRLUPE!!' (throws wine in face)

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I choose not to post a comment on some subjects because I know there will be a hundred others that will be the same.

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Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

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blow nose. look at kleenex.

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After watching a video of someone doing something tiring, I always feel tired in whichever body part they were using in the video

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Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

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Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

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Accidentally turning the fan on instead of the light when you walk into the bathroom and having a mini-spazz attack because the sound scares you.

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log out of any social network sites so that when im on a website it doesnt somehow send messages to my profile

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When I am in a car i always think there is massive swords coming out the edge of the car and make everything the same length up

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I cannot stand mosquito's if I am asleep and I hear one I turn my light on so I can find it and kill it and I wont rest until I do

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.