I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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Meet a really cool girl imagine the rest of my life with her.

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I say my first name every night before I go to sleep because I want it to be the last thing I say before I die.

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when you mouth words (but saying them out loud) when someone can't hear you

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turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

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always check thde back seat before starting the car

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fap

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Think that If I leave a big knife out on the counter- or a pair of tights/belt/scarf out in view, I believe that ultimately someone will break in and kill me via the aforementioned items.................and I will only have myself to blame.

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Math tests-doing all the work for a problem only to find out my answer is not any of the multiple choices.

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Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'horse-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

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Spend countless hours looking at cars online I know I'll never be able to afford

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Embarassingly repeatedly use of the word "bro" when irritated or excited.

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When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

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Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

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twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

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Dramatically narrate everything I do in my head as I do it.

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become increasingly panicked when its dark and you cant find the door handle.

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Make a little song with tiny breaths out of your nose

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Get annoyed when you are making a new account and it sends you bafk because of credit card or email address

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Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

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Put toilet paper in the toilet before I'm going to take a shit, so that the toilet won't get dirty.

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When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

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When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

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Wear hoods and sweatshirts in the middle of summer

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.