I get mad at characters on tv and i shoot the screen with my Nerf gun

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I find it easiest to read or study while sitting on the toilet.

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I really enjoy self-pity.

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Wondering where are famous people and what they are doing at this exact moment.

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after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

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When you buy a car you then see that make/model everywhere.

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When you're full at a restaurant and leave your drink. One day you're thirsty and remember back to when you COULD have finished that drink.

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Sometimes I look at a digital clock and try to force the numbers to change with the power of my mind.

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In the summer when it's hot, I bring a fan into the bathroom when I take a crap.

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I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.

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I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

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If I'm walking in the mall and realize I'm going in the wrong direction, I can't just double back, 'cause everyone would think I'm dumb for going in the wrong direction. Instead, I perform a slow U-turn to the other side of the walkway; either that or pretend to get an important text/phone call that forces me to do the quick turnaround. SAVE!

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Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

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i would air drum even if theres no music playing

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Feeling like no one really "knows" me, but only what they already see/know. Most things about me my family don't know about.

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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Not being able to balance in heels because the insides are smothered in foot sweat. -_-

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When I say, "What?" after understanding exactly what someone said.

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Look at my poop before flushing

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Call the ninja turtles by their full names.

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acting as if you can shoot with a banana

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Try having a conversation with your friends parents but keep saying yeah the whole time

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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Legally changing your name to Peter Jankins just cuz

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.