Cover the built in webcam on my laptop when I'm using it with a folded piece of paper just in case

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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Putting your bra on your dogs dead

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try to count down when the school be is going to ring.

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Pick giant boogers and eat them.

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Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.

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Constantly look at all clocks when the minute hand/digit reads '11'

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I have to look at myself in multiple mirrors before I leave my apartment. Sometimes if I'm alone, I'll walk back and forth between 2 or 3 mirrors about 25 times before I'm content to leave.

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I flick my boogers on the carpet knowing that I can just vacuum them up later.

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I don't like to sit with my back to the door incase someone or something sneeks up behind me, it's even worse with headphones on.

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I used to drive home from my girlfriend's house late at night and stop on a stretch of road to take a leak. I'd walk backwards while peeing, creating a crooked line of pee in the road. I'd add to it night after night, then I'd drive by in the day to see my long pee stain in the road only I knew about. Anyone who passed by could see it, but only I knew what it was. It would last until the next rain and I'd have to start over.

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After washing butt, turn my butt towards the shower and spread butt cheeks apart to wash the soap out of my crack.

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I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

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I cannot stand mosquito's if I am asleep and I hear one I turn my light on so I can find it and kill it and I wont rest until I do

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feel disappointed when i find out that a p0rn scene is just the actor's dream or imagination.

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say "ow" when your character in a video game gets hurt

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When I wanted to sit on chair or anything, I'll wipe them first, in case there is something sticked on them

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I avoid closing my eyes in the shower in case ghosts/monsters/zombies get me.

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When I'm opening my locker lock, I try to beat the person next to me.

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Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

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Pretend animals talk to you!

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turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

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Sometimes I see on the clock, the seconds needle go back 1 second and then never do that again for the rest of the day/week or whenever I'm staring at the clock for it to happen again. -Mike

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Sometimes I reflect on my life and just feel humiliated.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.