Find myself thinking a completely random meaningless sentence as I'm falling asleep with no idea how I got to that thought.

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On YouTube, if someone comments a time in the video (or in the description) I always click it for fun, even if it doesn't work. Like if someone comments "it's 4:12 right now" on a 2 minute video I click the link.

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when you're microwaving something and you have to pee, you run to the bathroom. then you run back to see if there is still time left before the "bomb" goes off.

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I like to sleep on the floor; my my cushion is too soft.

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I never read the terms and conditions but I say I have

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1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

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use the restroom at a different floor/building when taking a dump at work.

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think of who i would kill if i found out i only had a few weeks to live. i.e. sickest criminal alive.

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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I wonder what a baby is laughing about when they are apparently being entertained by something in the room I can't see

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Blow dry my dick and balls after getting out of the shower.

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You feel like someone can read your mind so you try not to think about stupid stuff.

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when I'm lying in bed and I really have to fart, I lift up the blanket, stick my ass out and fart into the night air to keep the stench out of my bed

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check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

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Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

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Waking up at 4 am wondering where your pillow went.

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Talk to my cat.

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Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

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When im in a public toilet, i try not to make any sounds when taking a crap, not even a fart, so that when i come out no one will think i was taking a crap.

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Go for a 10 mile run.

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When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

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When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.