Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

I am sure that no one else has the same mental slowness as me and my brother. When I say mauve he says maeve and we continue like this for hours. It is certainly an exciting way of eating up those motorway miles:)

I really like the day I was born even though there is nothing special about it like Dec 25 or May 20 (Christmas or Independence day)

gh, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a long time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

When I see that someone else is typing while I'm texting them, I try to quickly finish what I'm typing and send it so that I won't have to change my response.

Only use the left earphone.

I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

When I'm walking on the sidewalks, I make a game of how to walk on the pavement squares so I don't step on a line.

when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

Feel uncomfortable with the TV volume on an odd number

Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

The girl I like has just managed to transfer her consciousness into my mind, now being to hear my every thought and see everything I do. Just. Act. Cool.

I push the door open with my stomach

Go to websites like this during school and laugh at the things I read. All around me other students are actually working and looking at me.

Close my eyes and squeeze them so I can see colorful stars and galaxies.

When I am doing something that involves using one hand I feel weird because I don't know what to do with my other hand

Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

Feeling sorry for objects to throw away!! Haha anyone els?

Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

When you stop to tie you shoe, you re-tie the other so one isnt tighter than the other.

When I'm walking on a sidewalk, I try to step on each tile an even amount of times.

Open the microwave at 1 second left to pretend you're on a bomb squad.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.