When I fart I immediately go 'Eww. Who farted? That's gross'. And I blame it on someone else, always works :)

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Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

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Stare off into space in the middle of a conversation

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When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

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When I create a situation in my mind where someone is making me mad, then I actually get mad.

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moving your hand with objects that are already moving and pretending you have the force.

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blow nose. look at kleenex.

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Hate when people ask "do you have a bathroom?" It's like "no we crap in the yard!"

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when you bleed you suck your own blood

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Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

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My login password is INCORRECT so if I forget it my computer will say "your password is incorrect"

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Telling yourself that starting tomorrow you will start to exercise and eat better, but never doing it.

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after switching lights..i go run as hard as i could do after reaching the bed

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When you accidentally like get something on your hand so you go to wash it off but feel compelled to wash your other hand too even if it's not dirty

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Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

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Absentmindedly rub your stomach while lying down watching or reading.

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I gotta get down of Friday

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i use dental dams

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Abuse your pet when nobody's looking

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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I seriously contemplate what my theme song would be. I imagine it would have no words and a slight Mission Impossible influence.

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every bite i have of a sandwich, i need to have a sip of a flavored drink to "soften the bread and make it taste good".

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.