I Repeat my coincidental happenings..and say please don't do(x5)..

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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Pour the cheap shampoo I can only afford these days into the empty expensive bottle to trick myself I'm still using the good stuff.

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Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

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When Ive just intentionally committed some minor traffic offense (speeding, illegal U-turn) and suddenly worry a cop may have spotted me and act to myself in the car as if I was truly confused and have no idea what I did wrong, like moving my head around and saying, "Huh? Where's that house?"

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I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

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Smiling like an Idiot when you get a cute text

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I refuse to forward chain letters

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Set Fire to the Rain

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When bored in School, I like to imagine what I would do at that exact moment if a Zombie Apocalypse started.

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After you wipe your butt and crotch with a towel, you dont want the towel to touch your face. Next night, dry your face and head first.

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Wear hoods and sweatshirts in the middle of summer

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When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

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Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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I sometime's wonder if other people can see and feel everything I can but are just in my body too judge me.

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Think about when im old and im dying and under what circumstances,and think will i remember this day when i thought of it and think,shit that was fast,almost like sending myself a message to the future...if that makes any sense lol

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Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

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Sometimes when walking, accidently fart and then try to squeak my to sound like my shoes squeaked instead of me farting.

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Act like your on a cooking tv show when your cooking

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Whenever I drop food on the floor I get my dog to come clean it for me

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

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if your behind glass or a window and you see a group outside, imagine their conversation.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.