Wake up after a dream. About a day later you think about if it was real or not.

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Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

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pee when you are dreaming haha lol

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getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

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I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

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It's hot but I still have on covers

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like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

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hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

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Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

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I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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not eating the ends of a hotdog.

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When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

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Shit in the shower and pushing it down the drain with your feet

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I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

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Laugh quietly to myself in public then cough to make the laugh seem like a it was a cough so people won't think I'm weird.

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Only use the left earphone.

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Having small fingers and, regardless, still unable to click on the right thing when on the internet with a touch screen phone.

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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Do a light cough when in the toilet when there isn't no lock on the door so Ur stop someone walking in!!!

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pull out a flies wings and let it go

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When taking a pee instead of standing in front of the toilet stand in the side so if someone walks in they wont see your penis

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

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Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.