I used to eat bath bubbles

I never read the terms and conditions but I say I have

DAS RITE MODERFOCKER! NOWUN MESSIS WIF FIRLUPE!!' (throws wine in face)

Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

Pronouncing 'garage' as 'grozhh'

watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

Tried to suck ur own penis

Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

join online argument even though you have no idea what the argument is about

When in long car rides I imagine a little man running or on roller skates next to the car. When A car comes he turns into a ninja and can slide under/jump over or cut the car in half.

Your mom. Just kidding everyone does her.

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

Give a 'thumbs up' or a 'thumbs down' based strictly on how much you like the number it will change it to.

Go for a 10 mile run.

Sometimes I wonder who created words. For instance, who thought to call a fence a fence? It could have been called something completely random like bucxbuw, but it would seem normal to us and fence would seem like jibberish instead.

When im alone i have a conversation with myself

close the fridge door really slowly just so you can see the light turn off

When I'm bored I throw a plastic bag in the air and see how long I can keep it from touching the ground.

Delete the whole password when I mess up only the one letter.

Turn on Fox News and wonder if I'm watching a bad comedy routine or news reporting.

I hug-squeeze the bread to get all the air out before putting it away.

Suddenly thinking that this is all a dream, and having to pinch yourself to make sure it isn´t. Or is it?

Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.