You or someone you know has a secret crush/liking but the always shout it to the world. My sister does that.(It's why I ask)

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think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

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every single time a sad song comes on your ipod you imagine yourself in a movie, gloomily looking out a window or sitting alone on a bench.

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make south park refferences every day

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Random strong urge to squeeze immensely cute pet.

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Constantly looking up at a Facebook tab while on another tab to see if you have any notifications or messages.

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I have to put the radio volume in multiples of three and my daughter has to put it in multiples of five so when we are together it either has to be on 15 or 30.

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pissing really fast to remove shit stains in the toilet

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Sometimes I wonder if my life is a dream and oneday I'll wake up as a newborn baby

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Touching your nipples at night wondering if anyone else wanted to touch them all day :)

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touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

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Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

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Make jokes about yourself on the period: "dear god, this is the 5th day I`m bleeding and I`m sill not dead. What kind of monster am I?" ...not funny... :)

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Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

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When i'm in the front passenger seat, I still move my foot like im the one driving...

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After you wipe your butt and crotch with a towel, you dont want the towel to touch your face. Next night, dry your face and head first.

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I repeat (in my mind) the person's name that I want to dream about when I go to sleep

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When I'm running a bath I sometimes sit and look at myself in the mirror and act out conversations with people I've never talked to or celebrities, and when I say something that sounds good I'll repeat it over and over again until I nail huge emotions on my face.

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I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

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when I get a really good idea, I write notes in excruciating detail, as I believe my brilliance will quickly disappear and I will have no idea what I was writing about ..

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when u were younger and closed the fridge door super slowly 2 c when the light turned off

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I sniff my finger after I scatch my bunghole lol

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I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

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Fantasize about being with somebody else when I have sex

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.