I combine every item on my plate in all the possible ways, then i eat the worst part of the meal and save the best part til last.

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Watched the woman in black then go to bed then suddenly a woman in black comes in my room oh wait it is just my mum saying good night

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I wish I was born again, but I had all of the knowledge I have now.

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Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

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I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

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You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

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when im lying in bed and fart i bring the blanket up to my nose and smell it. And nod in approval..

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Thinking your life is a movie...

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Sometimes I think that if we play with dolls, maybe we're just dolls that someone is playing with and creating lives for.

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Check your analog watch, wait for it to strike a minute, then look away and try to count 60 seconds out in your head before you look again. However many seconds you were away is your new record.

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I constantly talk to myself.

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I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

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im going to rape that girl

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Open the fridge, nothing there, close fridge, open again just to make sure nothing has magically appeared

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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I hold my breath in elevators

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I am always SO sure the metal detector or store alarms will go off when I walk through them. –Ikka

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pretend you have a fishing pole and are reeling in cars to pass them when your in the passengers seat going down the freeway.

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Wearing cheap CZ rings to either stop guys hitting on me or pretend I'm engaged.

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When approaching a stoplight, I evaluate the vehicles in front of me to determine which ones I think will take off faster so I can get behind them.

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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Try to balance the light switch between on and off.

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if I see submissions above mine get thumbs up but not mine I will put them down

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Wishing you could go back in time and do a situation over again, becuase you regret the stuff you did.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.