the power to regenerate your appendix

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Pretend my life is a videogame.

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After using the restroom at someone's house I turn on the water and proceed to check myself in the mirror while the water runs and sounds like I'm washing my hands then I turn off the water and walk out.

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I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

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When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

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When I'm walking along and just trip over my own foot I look back and pretend to look at whatever it was I tripped over.

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watch old shows I used to watch when I was younger

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When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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Feeling very uncomfortable for days, untill your motivation finally reaches that point when you start learning for the exam.

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I stare at the paint impasto on the ceiling until I see faces.

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When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other in the same way just to be fair to both hands

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Automatically lie to your dentist when they ask if you floss

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Whenever I am in a conversation with someone, be it a family member, close friend, or stranger, I nearly always imagine either starting a random brawl with them for no reason (i.e. punching them in the face) or making out with them or something, neither of which I would ever consider doing. Am I alone?

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Abuse your pet when nobody's looking

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I like to watch online videos of people and pause the video mid sentence to see the faces they make frozen mid speech

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Read through all these posts and get all excited when you see things that you thought only you did

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Whenever I'm in the shower, I never close my eyes because I think someones gonna kill me

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Raising your hand in class, and once you're called on, you say, "I forgot."

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while i'm doing something,i think a suitable soundtrack for it.

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When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

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I always have to know exactly what time it is before I go to sleep, just so I can figure out exactly how many hours of sleep I will get.

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When I'm in a car holding a handheld device (iPod, Cell Phone, etc.) I have a feeling I will randomly throw it out the open window. I would never do this, but I'm still afraid I might.

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Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.