Whenever people dare accuse me of being too full off myself I tell them. Moral: I cant get to full of myself, the more me, the less you, ALL THE BETTER FOR EVERYONE! WE ARE VICTORY! (except you)

That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

When I'm home alone, turning the TV on so it's not so quiet

tries to beat the search from loading the results before Im done typing my search when using youtube for xbox 360

Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

Mayada stupid

I sometimes deliberately missed buses and trains even if I could easily board them.

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

When you get lost while driving, the first thing you do is turn down the radio.

Walking down stairs. Accidently miss last step. Feel like you're going to die.

Walking down the toy isle in the store, and feeling a little sad that you're not a kid anymore.

I Repeat my coincidental happenings..and say please don't do(x5)..

Find something on this site that you actually do not do, and think how weird the person who wrote that must be.

i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.

I have won so many competitions online for things like being the 99, 999th visitor on the site

become increasingly panicked when its dark and you cant find the door handle.

I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

I get angry when people use question marks where they don't belong. QUESTION marks are for QUESTIONS. Not statements or opinions >:( "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion?" X FFFUU- "But whatever I don't care I mean that's your opinion." ?

apparently you turn or twist everything to tight like a sink or a bottlecap ect. "i cant open the bottle of fu***ng coke becase you "

If there is a big spider in the house I will act cool and take it out even though inside I'm screaming

dream about the most amazing guy/girl that you have a relationship with and hope it comes true

Count the number of letters in a word or phrase.

Go to get a drink and by the time you get there you already forgot what you were doing.

Live in a house my whole life and still not know what switch does which

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.