When making something I pretend I'm making a YouTube video of it and pretend I am getting lots of views

I like to poo while smoking.

When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

pee in my pants on purpose for the fun of it

Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

really wonder why there is so much talk about pooping and farting on this site

think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

When in shower, I turn the heat to max for a few minutes to warm up the whole bathroom.

Tally mark everytime I take a shit.

when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

Drop something down the side of the couch, say that you'll get it in a minute and then forget about it

send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

CORRECTION, THINGS I KNOW ONLY I DO. OWN YOU ALL HAAAAAAAAAAAARD! Moral: DOUBLE FLAWLESS! EXPLOSION SOUND!

whenever there are automatic doors at a store i use "the force" to open them

Someone asks you "what's up" and you awkwardly reply "good".

When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

apparently you turn or twist everything to tight like a sink or a bottlecap ect. "i cant open the bottle of fu***ng coke becase you "

Keep things on my body equal. ex. Hold something in my right hand so I hold something equally heavy in my left hand.

Closing your eyes and covering your ears when you think someone is going to throw up.

whenever im getting a haircut, i feel as if the barber can see my embarrassing and private thoughts.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.