Wake up after a dream. About a day later you think about if it was real or not.

Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

pee when you are dreaming haha lol

getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

I use my mobile as a torch and keep hitting random buttons to keep it alight.

It's hot but I still have on covers

like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

not eating the ends of a hotdog.

When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

Shit in the shower and pushing it down the drain with your feet

I don't know about anyone else but I really felt bad when the Lich killed Prismo in Adventure Time

Laugh quietly to myself in public then cough to make the laugh seem like a it was a cough so people won't think I'm weird.

Only use the left earphone.

Having small fingers and, regardless, still unable to click on the right thing when on the internet with a touch screen phone.

Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

Do a light cough when in the toilet when there isn't no lock on the door so Ur stop someone walking in!!!

pull out a flies wings and let it go

When taking a pee instead of standing in front of the toilet stand in the side so if someone walks in they wont see your penis

When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

Spend a ton of time on the way you look and the clothes you choose, then going out in public and imagining you're a celeb.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.