Try to balance the light switch between on and off.

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Sunday's are making me feel depressed.

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When taking a shit, I get freaked out in case I get teleported to a place with lots of people by a scientist from the future or something.

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People looking at me when listening to my Ipod. "Can they hear my music?" *turn volume down*

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Sometimes at a red light, I like to look at the person driving next to me and if they look towards me I quickly turn around and pretend I wasn't looking at them.

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When looking at these comments, don't like the ones with lots of comments on because you think they have too many and the others deserve your liking as they might feel left out.

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Rubbing the corners of your lips on the side of your hand and smelling it.

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Find something you dislike about your face/body and instantly compare it with every person you meet from then on

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Open the fridge, nothing there, close fridge, open again just to make sure nothing has magically appeared

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When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

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Always coming up with a really great comeback in my head 5 seconds too late. And then playing out what would have happened if I had said it.

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During an assembly, I try to be the last one to clap/ stand up/ sit down.

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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open the fridge A eat food B think

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When I'm about to get in bed, I turn my light off and then run and jump into bed so that nothing gets me.

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Find myself thinking a completely random meaningless sentence as I'm falling asleep with no idea how I got to that thought.

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*Sees bug on wall while taking shower* *Splashes with shower water* *Bug slides down wall* >_

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Scan forward to best parts of songs, rarely listen to entire song.

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When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

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When I'm in a place with two different colored tiles, I only step on the colored ones and pretend the white ones are lava or off-limits.

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1.Open the fridge...nothing to eat :/ 2.Open the cabinet...nothing to eat :/ 3.Lower expectations..and then repeat :)

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when going through this website only read post that have 2 or more thumbs up

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.