i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

thumb_up thumb_down -50

jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

thumb_up thumb_down -40

when something on the internet is loading really long i close all the other tabs so my computer can concentrate only on one thing and then i get annoyed because i have to open up all the tabs again

thumb_up thumb_down +37

I sometimes wonder if im the only living person on earth and everyone else is just there in order to affect my existance -Henry

thumb_up thumb_down +1,442

While listening to songs, your always thinking of a situation to go along with it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,359

It is really difficult for me to lose control of myself

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

trying to piss after masturbation hurts.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Think something that you REALLY don't want to think and hurriedly force your mind to change its thoughts.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,615

when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

thumb_up thumb_down +26

When the hero of a movie is drowning I hold my breath to see if I would survive.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,091

Roll my eyes with them closed when I am annoyed with someone

thumb_up thumb_down -76

think that things u do aren't gross and when other people do them its disgusting

thumb_up thumb_down +617

Drying yourself after the shower with a towl, wiping your ass dry and beeing scared when you dry other parts of your body you dont use the same part of the towl.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Ask someone "what" when they tell you something even though you heard them clearly

thumb_up thumb_down +44

I don't like Winter. Because I'm scared that when we use the heater, our house will catch on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -104

I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

I really enjoy self-pity.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

take 30 pictures and only find 1 where you dont look like shit

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

thumb_up thumb_down -57

I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Hold my pen or pencil with two fingers cued against my palm and two fingers sliding up the pen with my thumb in between them.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.