At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I chuckle whenever I hear the phase "Stark raving mad." I don't know why.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Drop something down the side of the couch, say that you'll get it in a minute and then forget about it

thumb_up thumb_down -9

After reading certain things on this website, I try them to see if they work.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

thumb_up thumb_down +10

fist myself to the point of unconsciousness whilst masturbating to the speeches of Hitler

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Get bored of regular porn and watch some bestiality just for the variation.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Purposely scuff a shoe on pavement after the other scuffs by accident. Feel you scuffed this foot a little too much and so re-scuff the first to balance things out.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -109

pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Sometimes I become paranoid that the ceiling is going to randomly come crashing down and kill me.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

thumb_up thumb_down -8

When you are looking over someones shoulder and they look at you thinking you are staring at them so you suddenly turn your head

thumb_up thumb_down -34

realize you are saying your thoughts outloud.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

I can't drink while I'm walking I have to stop.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Writing d as b and b as d or p as q

thumb_up thumb_down +11

You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I praise the honesty of you all! :) I think confessing here is kind of fun...am I alone?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

ur parents never pay attention to u but when they do they r yelling at u

thumb_up thumb_down -102

whenever there is a person I really, really hate, I imagion them dying in a cruel and painful way.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I bought a ps4 and really regret it.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

blow nose. look at kleenex.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.