Laugh harder when trying to explain what you are laughing about

I always save a bite of my favorite food for last so that is the taste I have in my mouth when the meal is over.

DAS RITE MODERFOCKER! NOWUN MESSIS WIF FIRLUPE!!' (throws wine in face)

Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

Sometimes, I skim through the Terms of Service just to make sure I'm not selling my soul or promising my first-born.

If I drop a piece of candy on the floor, I have to drop another piece so it won,t be lonely

setting your alarm early so that when you wake up you see you still have time to sleep and you're like YES!!!

You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

outside in the dark see a face in the tree thinks its bigfoot come to get me!

cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

calling someone and it rings so long you forget who your calling and when they answer you have to look at your caller i.d to remember.

talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

The ability to go one hour back in time by concentrating really hard for two hours.

Pretend I'm a back-up dancer or singing a duet with the singer of the song I'm listening to.

don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

when you read a post that you don't do then start doing it

Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

Whenever I slurp from a straw I do it a little bit at a time, slowly and steadily so people don't turn at me and give me an annoyed face.

Click an invisible pen I think is in my hand but is not constantly everyday.

Kick the fallen ice cube underneath the fridge

I violate and then kill people, all ages and kinds... ..:But everyone does that right? I mean... Lol, I just type that because I am insecure now, and I kill when I am insecure... ...Excuse me.

Pretend i'm a sim.

I Repeat my coincidental happenings..and say please don't do(x5)..

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.