Laugh harder when trying to explain what you are laughing about

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I always save a bite of my favorite food for last so that is the taste I have in my mouth when the meal is over.

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DAS RITE MODERFOCKER! NOWUN MESSIS WIF FIRLUPE!!' (throws wine in face)

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Blink and pretend that you just took a picture with your eyes.

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Sometimes, I skim through the Terms of Service just to make sure I'm not selling my soul or promising my first-born.

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If I drop a piece of candy on the floor, I have to drop another piece so it won,t be lonely

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setting your alarm early so that when you wake up you see you still have time to sleep and you're like YES!!!

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You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

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outside in the dark see a face in the tree thinks its bigfoot come to get me!

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cussing someone out on a video game only to realize that your mic is off

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calling someone and it rings so long you forget who your calling and when they answer you have to look at your caller i.d to remember.

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talking on the phone with somebody and then spending 10 minutes or so looking for your phone...

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The ability to go one hour back in time by concentrating really hard for two hours.

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Pretend I'm a back-up dancer or singing a duet with the singer of the song I'm listening to.

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don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

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when you read a post that you don't do then start doing it

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Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

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When I am drinking coffee and I am nearly finished I swish the coffee to get the last of the sugar

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Whenever I slurp from a straw I do it a little bit at a time, slowly and steadily so people don't turn at me and give me an annoyed face.

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Click an invisible pen I think is in my hand but is not constantly everyday.

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Kick the fallen ice cube underneath the fridge

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I violate and then kill people, all ages and kinds... ..:But everyone does that right? I mean... Lol, I just type that because I am insecure now, and I kill when I am insecure... ...Excuse me.

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Pretend i'm a sim.

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I Repeat my coincidental happenings..and say please don't do(x5)..

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.