sniff my armpit when somebody says someone stinks and shouts NOT ME lol

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Try to do things while waiting for the microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

thumb_up thumb_down -65

When winking, I feel as if I have to wink with the other eye to be fair to both eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Think about the things you could do with you had the power to stop the time.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Think about the things you could do if you had the power to stop the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +179

When I see someone I know walking toward me as I'm walking toward them from a long way away, I pretend I don't see them until we're right on top of each other, then, miraculously discovering them, I smile and say, "Hi".

thumb_up thumb_down +126

Sometimes I think that I'm a character in The Sims 3 and someone is controlling everything I do.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

When the car ride is silent, I wink with my right eye when I pass a sign on the right, and the opposite for the left. And then when there's a double yellow line, I close my eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Look at restaurant signs and realize the font isnt as fancy as you once thought

thumb_up thumb_down -54

On Youtube. Moving the mouse cursor over the video thumbnails thinking it will display different snap shots from the video. And realizing what a guy I am...

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Fantasizing about your friends in like 25 years telling there teenage kids about growing up and being friends with you. When you are a huge rich and famous star.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Read this site's posts, think of something awesome to write but then forget it because you decided to read more and finish the page rather than write it immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Check my underwear for any sh!t from farts (yes, sometimes my shit comes with a fart) captcha: royal flush

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Kill Jb without getting aressted.

thumb_up thumb_down -72

After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

You imagine your future self visiting you and tell you about your life.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

You like to think about how your favorite characters would react if you told them that they were fictional.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

get home from work and masturbate instantly

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I scrape the scum off my teeth with my fingernail and then I eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.