sit on the toilet when taking a crap and play my iPod or laptop at the same time for something to do.

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Playing TV in bed because if I don't I jump at every noise in the house and don't sleep.

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When I am driving, I hate everyone else who is driving.

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When I stop thinking about about something it'll turn out that I've been staring at someone without meaning to.

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When I watch a movie that terrifies me, I usually find myself sitting on the sofa with a kitchen knife in my hand at the end of the movie.

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when im lying in bed in summer and im hot i just turn my sheets on the other side so its cool again

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When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

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I plan to put money away everyday but never seem to do it.

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I like eating chicken clubs with my hands and dip them in ketchup while pretending I am a caveman

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I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

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Smelling your armpits to see if you smell and then disguising at as yawn/stretch

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Put my hand under the pillow in bed to get orgasm

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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After waking up from being extremely intoxicated the night before, i check my phone and ALL my accounts on the internet to make sure i didnt make an ass of myself.

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every single time a sad song comes on your ipod you imagine yourself in a movie, gloomily looking out a window or sitting alone on a bench.

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On an one night if I come too fast .je persuade the girl that I have to forget my cellular in my automobile and I get out

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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I delete all notifications on my phone before i shut it off.

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If I'm walking in the mall and realize I'm going in the wrong direction, I can't just double back, 'cause everyone would think I'm dumb for going in the wrong direction. Instead, I perform a slow U-turn to the other side of the walkway; either that or pretend to get an important text/phone call that forces me to do the quick turnaround. SAVE!

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When I'm crying i look in the mirror to see what i look like while I'm crying

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Whenever your going down a flight of stairs with two rails, hold the two rails and go from the top step to the bottom.

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Instead of having a nasty breaking up, I just disappear.

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"Hey, did you see that new episode last night?" "Yeah!" "Do you remember that part when he ran through the city?" "Yeah!" LIES

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Having an OCD moment when the number of questions on a test is not a multiple of 5. I mean, who puts 47 questions on a test?! Or 53? English and Math teachers rarely do this but it's always the Histoy ones...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.