I sometimes start thinking about very non sexual things in the middle of masturbation, like what I'm going to wear the next day.

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watch cartoons even though most of my friends don't

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When I was younger I used to challenge myself with touching the roof I would first jump and see if I could touch it then I would try and see how long I can touch it and now every once in a while I just touch it and think of how far I have come.

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Get that shiver when you're peeing.

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I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.

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When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

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type "haha" because lol is too gay...but slip sometimes and type lol anyway lol....

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Lay down in bed and get comfortable and then realize you have to pee.

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wear warm clothes on hot days -jesse

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Get angry at someone for not knowing something I haven't told them about.

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When you are in a car and a sad song comes on look out the window and pretend you are in a movie.

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Absentmindedly rub your stomach while lying down watching or reading.

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When walking down a long hallway with someone else at the end, becoming self conscious that your eyes are watering up

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Sometime if I need to go I would go outside so I don't splash the seat

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Think that the shirts and bras that the girl you like should have never ben invented for that one specific person

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If I am waiting on someone and they are late, I start mentally listing their faults, flaws and mistakes but feel kind of bad for doing it when they finally show up.

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Zoning out while looking at something and then trying to find the spot you were looking at when you're out of the zone but you can't find it.

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Handing something to a friend or someone and all you can think is "...I've fapped with that hand. And they know I have" even though you clean up after you feel like your jizz is gonna be on what you gave them and theyll find out amd think you're disgusting.

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Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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Ur mum

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I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

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Scratching with the wife's/girlfriends hair brush.

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I am sure that no one else has the same mental slowness as me and my brother. When I say mauve he says maeve and we continue like this for hours. It is certainly an exciting way of eating up those motorway miles:)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.