when going to get a drink, i accidently pull out a bowl, or plate, later realizing what i did, i put it back, and get a cup

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this is a terrible website and i hate you

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Popping your finger in your bellybutton, and then smelling it. You secretly like the cheesy smell.

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laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

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Look up definitions of acronyms in text messages or Facebook that I feel I should know because I'm teenager.

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When I'm hungry I look in the fridge, but there's nothing good to eat so I shut the door and walk away. Then I look in the fridge again 10 seconds later in the hope that new food has arrived Robbie

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Play poly-rhythmic drum beats along with my turn signal on my car.

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Stand really close to the mirror and look myself in the eyes. Try to scare myself or make a really fast movement, hoping my reflection can't keep up.

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I randomly highlight stuff when I'm reading something, only to click outside of the text so I can actually read it.

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Hearing a noise and turning around to see if theres a monster in the room, and when you see nothing you think "hmm, he hides everytime I turn my head around." and then for the next minute you try to suddenly look back to see if you can catch it off guard.

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The longer it takes me to find the light switch in the dark the more frantic and terrified I become.

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Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

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I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

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When my friends talk bout a show they ask did u see the one where they did this and I nod even thow I have no idea what they're talking about

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When you are in a car and a sad song comes on look out the window and pretend you are in a movie.

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Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

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No matter how complicated your shower is at home, you always find it much easier to work than other people's showers.

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did you notice if you travel: when your going to the place feels like 10 hours but when going home feels like 4 hours

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When ever i hear music that i like i imagine im in a fight and i know martial arts with people i dont know

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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If I have a black surface I scratch my dandruff onto and make a dandruff galaxy.

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Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

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When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.