look around my house for something to do for what feels like an hour then look back at a clock to realize thats its only been 4 minutes

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Realise logically that a chicken egg is her period. we eat chicken periods!

thumb_up thumb_down -54

I hate other people's mirrors, they make me look different

thumb_up thumb_down -28

I'm starting to ignore Hollywood, the news and experts opinions more and more.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Fantasize a situation that turns you into a person with superpowers or something.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Think about past screw ups, then cross my eyes thinking to myself "I'm such a F---ing retard."

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

thumb_up thumb_down -89

Sitting on a table at school and looking at the things u only think i do website

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Counting the lines on the street as they pass the edge of your cars window.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Fart after someone else farts sop that no one will know you did too.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

While going to sleep, you turn the pillow downside-up several times to find a cooler surface.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Rapidly click the mouse when your computer is frozen, even though you know it won't do anything to help whatsoever.

thumb_up thumb_down +213

Play as both sides on fifa

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Never eat curry before school otherwise you will have a massive poo

thumb_up thumb_down +8

When I'm scared in the shower sing

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

When I forget to brush my teeth, scrape off the plaque on my teeth with my fingernail.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

I wonder what would happen if time froze and only I could move. I think about all the things I could do.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie) Discovering your friend is a total retard (Charlie)

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Start to cry when your alone, but stop yourself because you don't want to look like a pussy.

thumb_up thumb_down -98

feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.