Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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i always wipe the ketchup off my face with the bread of my sandwich

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Wanting something so much. Getting it then wondering what to do next

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I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

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Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.

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Count how long it takes before you stop peeing.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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On an one night if I come too fast .je persuade the girl that I have to forget my cellular in my automobile and I get out

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after you've been in a fight i usually think up some epic move i could've done instead.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Everytime I have ear buds in and I hear myself breathing, I think others can hear it too so I slow my breathing or hold my breath.

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Squeezing my cat's face back so it looks Chinese.

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Sometimes I look at security cameras and start to act suspiciously like I'm up to something... but really... I'm not.

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Masturbate while waiting for a game to load.

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Live in a house my whole life and still not know what switch does which

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See the person you like at school, have a quick random sexual thought about them, le random boner appears, and you flip out in your mind

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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when bored, i imagine my EXACT plan for the zombie apocalypse, down to what would look cool if i was walking down a desolate street ( i am legend style) :D

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Never write LOL on a text message, because you don't want to sound too extreme

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Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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When I see interactive ads on webpages ( "Shoot 5 iPhones And Get One Free!" type of windows ), I feel compelled to finish the task, even though I KNOW it's going to open a pop-up and waste 10 seconds of my life.

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Peeing in the shower

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.