Clench your butt super hard to slowly let out a fart thinking no one will know.

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Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

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Open blinds when taking a poop to look outside, then realize that someone could be watching you.

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Pretend to listen to iPod, but actually eavesdrop on the people around me.

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Automatically lie to your dentist when they ask if you floss

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Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

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Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

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In my head, my life is some kind of on-going documentary about my life. Sometimes when I'm alone, I conduct interviews.

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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

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Sitting down in the shower

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When im alone i have a conversation with myself

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When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

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When I am about to thumb up a comment here that has not happened to me, I first stop myself thinking "but that has not happened to me" then I remember I thumb up comments just because I like them and proceed to do so most of the times

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Accidentally turning the fan on instead of the light when you walk into the bathroom and having a mini-spazz attack because the sound scares you.

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Open a new google tab when someone walks in the room, even if I wasn't looking at anything bad.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

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Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

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Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

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If you see someone singing in a car, then search on the radio stations to find the matching song to the the miming you see.

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Sometime if I need to go I would go outside so I don't splash the seat

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1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

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start planning Halloween costumes on November first.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.