Sometime if I need to go I would go outside so I don't splash the seat

say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

get caught up in youtube comment arguments

when im alone and in a bad mood i make stupid faces with my eyes closed and try and figure out how stupid i looked. then i start laughing hysterically because i think that im an idiot. then i repeat this process until i have to pee from laughing so hard because im already in the bathroom so why not utilize the toilet, rather than waiting for a commercial and speed-peeing because im scared that i missed some of the show i was watching :D -Grace-

Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

Avoid as many television commercials as I can

whenever im doing sumthing im not suppose to i feel like everybody knows what im doing

When I am about to thumb up a comment here that has not happened to me, I first stop myself thinking "but that has not happened to me" then I remember I thumb up comments just because I like them and proceed to do so most of the times

Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

When walking down a long hallway with someone else at the end, becoming self conscious that your eyes are watering up

Singing alone in the car and then stopping, scared that there is an audio recorder in the car recording you singing.

I get into a massive fight with my parents, and then do the thing i was told not to just so i can tick them off.

when being in the bathroom at night, avoid looking in the mirror

My brother (who is 2 years younger) and I have our own language, consisting of movie quotes and silly stuff we made up when we were little. We speak it with abandon when we're alone, and try as hard as we can to suppress it when we're with a friend. But sometimes some of it slips out, and the friend looks at us like he's the guy who isn't in on the joke; I always get the feeling he or she thinks the two of us are crazy. By the way, if you're the third person in company with two close siblings who are speaking their own secret language, don't ask them to explain or look at them like they're crazy. They're not nuts, and you won't understand, even if they try to explain. Just let it pass.

.don't congratulate someone on facebook until someone other does, because maybe it's a fail.

Typing what you want to put in a message, then deleting it because you daren't send it

Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

When I'm sleeping, I turn and my bed shakes, and I wake up thinking it's an earthquake.

I wonder if things are there because I see it and if I was not there to see it would it disappear?

tries to beat the search from loading the results before Im done typing my search when using youtube for xbox 360

I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

Whenever I look in the bathroom mirror, I fear that I will see a terrible bloody monster standing behind me. I convince myself of this so completely that I panic and rush out right after I pee.

When in long car rides I imagine a little man running or on roller skates next to the car. When A car comes he turns into a ninja and can slide under/jump over or cut the car in half.

before going to a party, i rehearse the conversations i expect to have with the people who will be there (even though those conversations never actually happent)

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.