I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim

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when i'm at the computer i say out of loud what i'm typing

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Pretend i'm a sim.

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When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

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I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

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When there are multiple puddles on the sidewalk you try and jump in every single one of them

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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I look at this site and wonder if the thumbs up are all from people who actually do the same thing, or just people who like that or think it's a funny thing to do.

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when i am in a long car ride i look out the window and imagine im in a sad music video

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play with a laser pointer and pretend its a lightsaber

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I have to check my closet for monsters so they don't get me while I sleep

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poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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While making yourself something to eat that takes more than 5 minuets to make. Pretending that you have your own show on a cooking station and talk like your talking to the audience the whole time.

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get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

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When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

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When at Burger King, McDonalds etc. I always finish the drink before the food so that I still have the taste of the food in my mouth when I'm finished.

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invent arguments in my head with people to hone my debate skills for future arguments.

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Read for hours... then hear a narrative for everything you do after you stop reading. for ex: "Jen gets out of the car, shutting it with a loud bang. She walks towards the house, noticing the dead squirrel in the road."

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Always think "what if ghosts really ARE everywhere?" when I'm naked in the shower, or getting dressed, or any other private and/or embarrassing moment. Then get really freaked out and picture 6 people from 1902 watching you.

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Sometimes when I watch live TV, I mute the TV when I get embarrassed at what is happening on screen to other people.

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I praise the honesty of you all! :) I think confessing here is kind of fun...am I alone?

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Sitting down in the shower

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.