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Lick my cell phone screen to clean it.
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+1
I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!
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-54
When theres a sex scene in the movie I like to jack off to see if I would last as long as the man -deadpool (yogurt)
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-88
When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.
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-67
I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.
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-35
When the T.V switches to commercial sometimes I forget what I was watching Noel
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+12
Justin Beiber is a woman
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-26
In elementary school whenever it was supposed to be mental math I never did it mentally.
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+20
I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.
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-65
When I'm trying to sleep and my mind's like, "Hey, know what's a good movie? Paranormal Activity!" Then I can't sleep for an hour - Brayden Everes
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-108
When doing your hair or makeup you pretend your doing a tutourial when nones around
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-24
I pee in the sink so i don't have to aim
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-83
Look at a guy and think that he is a good looking guy, than immidiatly try to think of something else because thats gay.
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-19
When I aak someone out it takes me 3-6 attempts to get the words out
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-157
Read and laugh at about any top comment here... because it happens to me too.
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+17
One time I went to my old primary school and while I was there I needed the toilet. So I go use the schools and was shocked at how small everything was I guess because I haven't been there in a while
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+10
trying to piss after masturbation hurts.
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-50
Cry every day just because it makes you feel better.
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-86
i fap in the bathroom because its the only room i have a reason to lock the door in.
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-30
wake up in the middle of the night and write your dream if you like it. Or just write all night and dont sleep all night for days at a time.
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-16
I check behind the the shower curtin before I use the bathroom at night.
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+66
stand in front of a mirror with your headphones in, and lip sync the words of the song playing to pretend you are singing in a music video
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-20
I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home
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-76
watch lesbian porn instead of normal because you hate have other men in the picture
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-7
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.