close left eye, then right eye to see how things move....

thumb_up thumb_down -146

Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

read on youtube comments with too unlikes

thumb_up thumb_down -71

I don't like to sit with my back to the door incase someone or something sneeks up behind me, it's even worse with headphones on.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Open a new google tab when someone walks in the room, even if I wasn't looking at anything bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +815

Whenever I go to a new place, I look around and carefully plan my escape route in case of zombies.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Lay down in bed and close my eyes and pretend that the bed is slowly levitating towards the ceiling. When I open my eyes, the bed is back on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Spray my perfume under my arms so if I sweat then it smells like perfume.

thumb_up thumb_down -103

getting excited when you find a recycled tissue in your robe/sweatshirt so you don't know have to get up to get one yourself?

thumb_up thumb_down -71

get insulted when lazy people cheer you to work hard

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

You always go to the corner of the shower when the cold water is running.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

thumb_up thumb_down -81

My dreams are almost always bizarre in some way - the only time they're ever normal is when they're the premonition type, and then they're about completely uneventful things but accurate down to the tiniest detail.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

I eat ice creams from the bottom of the cone to the top.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Say to yourself "I really should get that work done" then do nothing about it

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

when you say something and they go what? so you repeat it and they still didn't hear but once you say "forget it" they suddenly understood you perfectly.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Write something down here so that it seems like you think its normal when your actually really paranoid that its not.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

I always go to sleep with every single one of my stuffed animals in my arms at the same time because I think that they get lonely and sad if I pick certain ones. Then again I sometimes wonder if they secretly hate me and think I'm a weird creep for hugging all of them every night. I'm 24.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Say what even when u heard someone

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.