When reading something you have different voices for the characters/people.

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Normally I can do a specific task no problem but when someone is watching and I know that they are watching I screw up.

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Feel really paranoid until my game score is a multiple of 5

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I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

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Run the shower before you get in/ move out the way of the water to let it warm up first

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judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

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Counting the lines on the street as they pass the edge of your cars window.

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Whenever I am in a dark room at night, and there is a window with blinds with a light shining through, I stand in front of it and pretend I am wearing a striped prison jumpsuit.

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On YouTube , I try to find the clearest music

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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Moisturize "down there" after a really drying wipe session.

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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Rereading a text message 25 times before you send it to make sure it makes sense.

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I read your stuff at the interwebs and think "sons, I am disappoint" Moral: Lol, I just might be your father you know... But that does not mean you disappoint me anymore, I kinda expect your worst? Best? I mean... Are you doing your worst on purpose? WOW!

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Open the fridge every 15 minutes, to see if there is anything new to eat.

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scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

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watch old shows I used to watch when I was younger

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When I'm around people, I sometimes yell in my head "STOP READING MY MIND! I KNOW YOU'RE DOING IT, SO STOP!" just in case.

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Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

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KICK THE CAN

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Try to stop a stopwatch exactly on 1 second with no extra milliseconds

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Thinking about what is nothing and other deep shit when trying to fall asleep.

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I flush the toilet if the water's green and I'm going to have a poo, so it doesn't splash me.

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when i was a kid, i lookup dirty words in the english dictionary as substitute for porn :(

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.