Run up the stairs like a gorilla because it's easier that way.

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Walking into the little door at the store that people put the carts though.

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I wonder why people were happy after the last election

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When someones talking to a group of people that I'm in and says something bad that I do but think nobody else does, I stand perfectly still and don't blink and breath as quietly as possible until the next subject arrives.

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Change the channel during commercials when you have the remote, when you don't you go insane and say "TURN IT BACK WE'LL MISS THE START!!!"

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Sometimes I put on my running shoes to make myself feel like I worked out but I really didn't.

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when my mum buys way too much of something I imagine were one of those 'doomsday preppers' families, with mounds of supplies in our basement.

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I say that girl's name I have a crush on right before I go to sleep because I want her to be the last thing I think about, and then wake up realizing that it was super creepy... Only to do it again the next night

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I get mad at characters on tv and i shoot the screen with my Nerf gun

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I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

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You remember something funny. You smile like an idiot. Everyone around thinks your weird for randomly smiling.

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sometimes, i smell my own farts.

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reading the back of the cereal box when eating cereal

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I prefer to masturbate by putting a fleshlight under my stuffed-toy smurfette's dress and pretend to smurf her.

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When I die during an online game I try to cram as much food and drink in my mouth as I can before I respawn. If I have no food I roll all over the bed.

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Get that shiver when you're peeing.

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Mentally preparing yourself to step on a crunchy-looking leaf, only to discover it is in fact soggy, soft and unsatisfactory.

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Whenever I fart, I always smell it. But when other people fart, I don't want to smell it.

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Sometimes I make awkward eye contact with strangers. And I quickly look away. And then I look back. And then look away again. And I keep being compelled to stare awkwardly at the random stranger for no reason.

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Afraid to do something your crush is doing so they don't think you're stalking them, even though you really want to. -B

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Every time I watch the movie I cry when the babysitter sings that song in the blues bar in the movie "Adventures In Babysitting"

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Get my belt loop caught on the door handle,

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i don't have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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Saving some leftovers of your favorite food .... the next week its still there (:

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.