Clench your butt super hard to slowly let out a fart thinking no one will know.

Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

Open blinds when taking a poop to look outside, then realize that someone could be watching you.

Pretend to listen to iPod, but actually eavesdrop on the people around me.

Automatically lie to your dentist when they ask if you floss

Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

Every time I miss a gree light by just a couple seconds, I think to myself, "Maybe if I had made that light an out of control semi would be slamming into my car right at this moment." Thank you red light.

In my head, my life is some kind of on-going documentary about my life. Sometimes when I'm alone, I conduct interviews.

When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

Sitting down in the shower

When im alone i have a conversation with myself

When I look at a clear blue sky, I'm convinced that I see little tiny floaty things, and think that I'm seeing air molecules.

When I am about to thumb up a comment here that has not happened to me, I first stop myself thinking "but that has not happened to me" then I remember I thumb up comments just because I like them and proceed to do so most of the times

Accidentally turning the fan on instead of the light when you walk into the bathroom and having a mini-spazz attack because the sound scares you.

Open a new google tab when someone walks in the room, even if I wasn't looking at anything bad.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <<

Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

Sometimes when my teacher calls on me in class I imagine myself saying F**** you and then having the whole class look at me in disbelief

If you see someone singing in a car, then search on the radio stations to find the matching song to the the miming you see.

Sometime if I need to go I would go outside so I don't splash the seat

1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

start planning Halloween costumes on November first.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.