Text random people saying I'm pregnant

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I approach balcony ledges with my feet firmly planted, just in case a random person decides to come pick me up and throw me off the balcony.

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when walking i always count how many steps i have taken as i go

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Laughing at a joke that you dont think is funny but everybody else does

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When I have an argument with someone and they're correcting my grammar over a word that I obviously made up but they're grammar/slash spelling skills suck I want to end them.

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Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

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Make up a song to yourself.

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i use dental dams

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It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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On the train, try and mathematically make (add,subtract,multiply,divide etc.) the carriage number to get to ten

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See my "double reflection" in 2 mirrors and then get freaked out for a good ten minutes that my usual image of myself is actually the flipped version...

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Create scenarios when you are standing around/ waiting for someone in public (ie. pretending you are sending a text to someone), in fear of what people may think if they see you standing around doing nothing.

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Wondering who would cry at your funeral

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Take off the ends of the banana (

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I cover my webcam on my when I fap in fear that someone/something is watching.

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I unlike Facebook pages if they spam my wall.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

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Smile like an idiot while reading this site.

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I always have to google the name of this website, because I always put the words in the wrong consecution.

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When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

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wonder y nobody facebook likes or comments on these

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.