When I sneeze I hold my balls ( only when Im alone)

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i always wipe the ketchup off my face with the bread of my sandwich

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Look at a word and count the letters by 2's - continue counting the letters over and over by 2's until it comes out even at the end of the word.

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I can't get out of bed in the mornings unless the alarm clock reads 0 or 5.

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When I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other in the same way just to be fair to both hands

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When no one's looking, I run up stairs on hands and feet.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Instead of using the twist ties on bread, I spin the bag of bread and then tuck the flap underneath.

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When i feel the back of my right hand starting to itch. in a few days, i get some money. When the back of my left hand itches.Some money goes.

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Saying "ow" even though whatever happened did not actually hurt, but you thought that it would.

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I flip the pillow at night to feel the cool sensation.

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Courtesy flush.

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Thinking your life is a movie...

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While spending the night drinking with my spouse at home, i put a diaper on so i don't have to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. I also change it for a fresh one when i go to bed.

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as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

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Whenever i hear myself in a video or something to me, it sounds way higher pitched than when I hear myself talking Is it just me?

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Think that the shirts and bras that the girl you like should have never ben invented for that one specific person

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People looking at me when listening to my Ipod. "Can they hear my music?" *turn volume down*

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Having to step on snails to hear the crunch

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Try to balance the light switch between on and off.

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When I go to the bathroom I put toilet paper over my penis and pretend its a ghost

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Walk around aimlessly when talking on the phone.

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I wet toilet paper before I use it to wipe.

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Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.