When you're the youngest child, you never quit feeling like a little kids, even in your 20s.

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when i pass a grave yard, i am compelled to hold my breath

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You remember something funny. You smile like an idiot. Everyone around thinks your weird for randomly smiling.

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I practice my signature on a piece of paper over and over again. Even though my signature has never changed.

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When i go to the bathroom i have to lift my shirt up the whole way.

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I pretend that my actions are perceived by a past self and they're always astounded by the change I've gone through.

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Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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always want to tell my friends the nightmares I had but they don't sound as horrible as they actually were spoken out loud and then get annoyed if their no tike 'OH my god! And what happened next...?'

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When at someone else's house, trying to use the bathroom, keep a very close eye on the door just to make sure nobody's gonna walk in on you...

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If I have a cold or runny nose, when I'm alone I stuff tissues in my nostrils so I don't have to keep blowing my nose sooooo much.

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When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

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Sometimes I toot.

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Keep things on my body equal. ex. Hold something in my right hand so I hold something equally heavy in my left hand.

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I use my magic powers to give shaddy politicians their comeuppance (I don't have any magic powers lol)

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clean specks of sh*t in the toilet by peeing on it.

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Open blinds when taking a poop to look outside, then realize that someone could be watching you.

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When you're in your late teens, you blare the car stereo when driving near girls that are walking. When you grow up, you turn the radio down in fear that you look like a tool bag.

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When I dont feel like sweeping I sweep the stuff under the fridge or something

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Sweep up the dirt into the dustpan and sweep the stuff you can't get under the cabinet.

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when u were younger and closed the fridge door super slowly 2 c when the light turned off

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Every time I walk up the stairs in my own house, I feel compelled to do it on all fours.

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join online argument even though you have no idea what the argument is about

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fart and talk thinking it will cover the smell

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.