when i have a head or toothache...i hit it harder thinking it will stop or get better

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Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

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Take a dump in the dark... Anyone but me?

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

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I type out something I think is funny, then wonder if people will think I'm weird and erase it.

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I like to record the audio from TV shows and movies onto cassette tapes from my stereo, and listen to them on my Walkman while I'm working in the kitchen or around the house.

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Go on this site to feel normal.

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Try to pet your cat with your foot.

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Make scary faces in the mirror and try to scare myself

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shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

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Making "X's" with your fingernail on bug bites to get rid of them.

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When I say, "What?" after understanding exactly what someone said.

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I kick my shoes off, sending them flying to various parts of the room. I then pick them up and place them neatly beside each other

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I look really handsome in my mirror, only to find myself looking weird in other mirrors, and like a total retard at photographies.

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When the hero of a movie is drowning I hold my breath to see if I would survive.

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when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

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I hold my boobs if I'm running upstairs and not wearing a bra.

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Get annoyed when I'm working on something and someone who's looking at funny pictures wants to show me every single one. Then I do the same thing when I'm looking at funny pictures.

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Having to step on snails to hear the crunch

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Pretending I'm in a phone call when I don't want someone to talk to me.

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If I hear a noise, it obviously means there is a monster somewhere in/near my bedroom and the sheets will protect me as long as they cover up to my chin.

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Give a 'thumbs up' or a 'thumbs down' based strictly on how much you like the number it will change it to.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.