When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

Stare blankly at your desktop when someone walks in the room so they won't know that you were watching porn lol

Sometimes when you're at work and you're REALLY horny, you look around at the women you work with and think who you really would like to bone, then on another particular day when you aren't horny, you see the same women and think to yourself " I must have REALLY been horny. What was I thinking?" lol (not trying to be gross, but honestly, who doesn't get horny while at work sometimes)

whenever there are automatic doors at a store i use "the force" to open them

During an assembly, I try to be the last one to clap/ stand up/ sit down.

really wonder why there is so much talk about pooping and farting on this site

When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

When I'm about to get in bed, I turn my light off and then run and jump into bed so that nothing gets me.

When someome asks you a question and you can't hear them so you say, "what?", then they say it again and you miss it so you just nod your head and say "yeah".

When I'm over at my friends house and they get in a fight with their sibling, I just pet their dog.

i take words i just read or said and sing them to the tune of a song

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

My login password is INCORRECT so if I forget it my computer will say "your password is incorrect"

try to get abs by doing the stupidest things

Start thinking about how your walking, and then worry that you may lose control of your legs and fall.

I have had a dream where my teeth fall out.

Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

When I was little and I saw disney's hercules I had no idea why Meg was working for Hades

When taking a dump in a public restroom, if someone else walks in, I wait until they leave the restroom before finishing up and leaving the stall, just to make sure they don't see who I am.

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I have an imaginary therapist. I talk to him in my head and he actually gives me really good answers.

When I remember something embarrassing I did or even something someone else did, I will yell random words. It started just with gasping but now I have like 5 words that I'll say randomly. It's evolved to include stressful or disturbing thoughts and not just embarrassing things. I have a pretty stressful life so I'm basically continuously making random sounds then looking around terrified that someone's heard.

Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.