Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

When you get lost while driving, the first thing you do is turn down the radio.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Whenever someone is making a speech, I imagine them being taken out by a sniper mid-speech...

thumb_up thumb_down +202

chew on the side of my teeth

thumb_up thumb_down -64

I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

when i have a head or toothache...i hit it harder thinking it will stop or get better

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Pretend that when you are in the shower, the shower head is a giant machine gun, that takes thousands of men to operate, and that you were an extremely large person and you catch ALL of the bullets in your mouth, spitting them at the shower head while at the same time turning off the water as if they all died, and the small drips that continue to drop out were the dead soldires' blood.....-dillon

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Getting really ticked off when Wikipedia tells you the ending of a book in the introduction. And the thing is that you don't even see it coming! Ex. My Sister's Keeper is about a family struggling with its own internal problems, especially with the oldest daughter having leukemia and the youngest is the only one who may or may not save her. *name* dies in the end. WTF?

thumb_up thumb_down -53

I wonder what a baby is saying when they are telling you off?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Always coming up with a really great comeback in my head 5 seconds too late. And then playing out what would have happened if I had said it.

thumb_up thumb_down +202

Sometimes i think i've been living a dream life, and one day im really gonna wake up in the middle of 9th grade math class and have to explain why i was sleeping on my desk and jerking off so much.

thumb_up thumb_down +125

I get mad at characters on tv and i shoot the screen with my Nerf gun

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When I walk from one room to the next, I make believe that the room I just left exploded, and that I made it out just in time.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Hate when you finish a cup of pudding or something like that and you don’t want to get up to put the spoon in the sink so you just leave it sitting in the cup but the spoon is too tall for the cup and it falls over.

thumb_up thumb_down +121

As im about to fall asleep sometimes i feel like im falling and then i have a muscle spasem and wake up.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Put ear buds in nose, open mouth, instant speaker. If you don't do it try it.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

when looking at a reflection of myself, i try to do it as fast as i can before the reflection does something i didnt

thumb_up thumb_down -63

Sick the top of you fingers in your pants when you are doing something that requires one hand, like watching t.v

thumb_up thumb_down -89

wonder if the strange thing you're doing right now will pop up on this website

thumb_up thumb_down -21

go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

thumb_up thumb_down -46

do math problems in my head while having sex to keep from coming

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

thumb_up thumb_down -108

Like a toy until it breaks.

thumb_up thumb_down -85

when I need to do a number 2 in a public toilet I put toilet paper in there first so my neighbours cant hear it.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.