When I look at a digital clock, i try to rearrange the number to make them a math equation

Wake up, unnaturally hungry, make meal fit for a king.

Make a day of reading posts from Craiglist's Best-Of.

I turn on the faucet or turn up the radio in the bathroom so maybe no one can hear me pee.

When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

whenever i'm holding a kitchen knife, i feel super weird like i'm gonna stab someone.... its not like i would ever do that, but i think about what would happen if i just impaled the person that is standing near me with a huge knife.

Look at my poo before I flush it.

Turn the light off, run, and JUMP into bed. I'm 26.

Answering questions that weren't directed at me, then awkwardly playing it off like they were talking to you.

check behind the shower curtain before taking a piss xD E E S

Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

Wonder if someone is ever doing the exact same thing you are at the moment.

put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

Hide your I pod when your parents walk in at 12pm and then go back to what ever you were doing when they leave.

I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

When I notice that I have just breathed in/out, for the next minute or so I feel like I have to make a conscious effort to keep breathing.

I Never read the Terms of Service but click the box anyway .

Open a new google tab when someone walks in the room, even if I wasn't looking at anything bad.

I think of unbelievably perverted things seconds before I am about to cum when masturbating.

Whenever I see a girl, I always do the math for how good they would be for banging

Walk around aimlessly when talking on the phone.

When eating chips/cereal (out of the box)/any small snacks I put an even amount in my mouth and divide them evenly on each side of my mouth and chew them like that.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.