Check the toilet paper after every wipe.

Moral: Damn I clicked on pointless super powers how did I get here! Moral: I wrote the "thing only I do" below :P

I wake up suddenly in the middle of the night with a feeling that I'm falling

Randomly agree for the Terms of Service for just about everything on the internet. Then becoming very frightened at the thought that you have violated them in some way.

get really embarrassed when i leave the book i read when i poop on the bathroom counter and someone uses the bathroom.

Get excited when the captcha says something related to whatever you're posting

THINK OF SOMETHING WEIRD YOU DO TO PUT ON THIS WEBSITE ONLY TO END UP FORGETTING IT BEFORE YOU GET ON THE COMPUTER

Pick scabs and eat them.. and when i start bleeding suck the blood up with my mouth...

When I climb into bed every night, I always say, "Bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed bed," while shifting until I am comfortablely settled.

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

Download a new app, and say to myself I'll never stop playing it. Play it for 2 hours and forget about it.

Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

When in bed, I fold a small section of the covers in my hand to make a point and poke my fingers with it.

Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

Try to fly by jumping and then discover you can't

When I'm waiting for someone who is late. I go-over in my head how I'm going to greet them. For example "Well, it's about damn time", or "Finally!".

Poop naked.

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

I act as though I've had movie cameras placed in my eyes and a bunch of people will watch my life as a movie at some point. And so I do a narration voice for them.

Sometimes when I'm sitting still I visualize myself being able to move myself using my mind.

looking at the last page of thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com to see how weird some people are...

When I have my headphones in, and I'm miming the words to a song in the bathroom pretending that I'm playing a gig. I put the tap on to make sure no one hears me dancing.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.