When im in a public toilet, i try not to make any sounds when taking a crap, not even a fart, so that when i come out no one will think i was taking a crap.

Saying "ow" even though whatever happened did not actually hurt, but you thought that it would.

When I forget to brush my teeth, scrape off the plaque on my teeth with my fingernail.

Put toilet paper in the toilet before I'm going to take a shit, so that the toilet won't get dirty.

Pee in the shower.

I always have to google the name of this website, because I always put the words in the wrong consecution.

When I'm home alone I open random doors to make sure nobodys there

get scarred shit less when some one burst though your door when it tacky

While waiting on someone I check my phone and if there is no new message I just read old ones, just to be occupied and don't look stupid or lost

When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

Popping your finger in your bellybutton, and then smelling it. You secretly like the cheesy smell.

Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

after having a hot shower I sometimes just sit in my room wearing just a towel

Check your analog watch, wait for it to strike a minute, then look away and try to count 60 seconds out in your head before you look again. However many seconds you were away is your new record.

When taking a shit, I get freaked out in case I get teleported to a place with lots of people by a scientist from the future or something.

Sex scene comes on TV while you are watching with your parents... Try to act normal... Fail.

Look at a word long enough to not seem like a word anymore, then sounding weird.

Doing a little dance after having sex because your so proud you're a FATHER!!! - Uncle Jerrett

Getting the strong urge to "woo" or scream in a large and quiet crowd, such as during church.

At school I go along with the norm even though inside I HATE it!!!!

Go into a shop that you thought would have some interesting things, but when you find that it dosn't, you quickly browse the shop for a bit so that you don't offend the cashier by entering and leaving immediately.

I scratch and sniff.

When you think thoughts, you think them in complete sentences as if you were saying them and in your accent.

No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.