wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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Get my belt loop caught on the door handle,

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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Taking your headphones/earbuds off a lot to see if your music is playing loudly. Or to see if other people could possibly hear it

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Am i the only one who noticed that the title of this page has a grammatical error?

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Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

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always picture someone naked even though sometime you really don't want to.

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While waiting for my food ot cook, I'll wash the dirty dishes that I used so that I don't need to wash lots of dishes after I eat.

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Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

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thumb down this post

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dont wash hands for the recommended 30 seconds

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as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

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Always think "what if ghosts really ARE everywhere?" when I'm naked in the shower, or getting dressed, or any other private and/or embarrassing moment. Then get really freaked out and picture 6 people from 1902 watching you.

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When I drive I cut corners even at low speeds so that the people behind me think I am experienced race car driver.

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I want to suck on your penis

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pull the poo out of my butt when im too impatient to push it out

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put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

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I ejaculate fire and glory

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Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

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close the fridge door really slowly just so you can see the light turn off

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Wally,you mean Obamney is the only choice?

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~When you turn around, somebody is already looking at you; something is probably on your face. (I know they look at you because you would look at anybody turning around, but I just hate it)

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Find yourself alone at a party/gathering of some sort... Pretend to send a text to make people think you're not a loner.

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Click my teeth from side to side at the beat of songs

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.