Fantasize about being with somebody else when I have sex

Pronounce hors d'oeuvres 'horse-dev-ers' thinking I'm so witty.

When I get bored of sex and p*rn, I download animal "mating" stuff for variation.

i don't have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

I put the volume on my television so it is on any number divisible by five (5-10-15 etc. etc.)

I worry because I keep wondering why I worry.

When pooping I always fold my TP before. Anyone else do that? I also always have 4 squares each XD Email me if you do it :P mr.michaelgiorgio@gmail.com

in a grocery store, only walking on the colored single tiles the entire time your in there pretending there small cliffs without touching the white one otherwise you fall and fail.

Knowing and feeling that the whole world is out to get me............ And only me......... I know.......... Weird right??????

like it when you fart because it scratches your butt when its itchy

eat the salt from the bottom of the pretzel bag

Pour the cheap shampoo I can only afford these days into the empty expensive bottle to trick myself I'm still using the good stuff.

waking up from an amazing/awesome dream and spend the rest of the day thinking up of new senarios to come after...

Think that a movie is shorter after you watch it once or twice

When in a public bathroom, flush the toilet right before your shit falls into the water, so no one will hear.

I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

go to the search engine suggestions and see what people found, then type them in to see if you get the same results

I am always SO sure the metal detector or store alarms will go off when I walk through them. –Ikka

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

When I play Sims, I feel like God and wonder if we, in fact, are just the players in God's Sims game. Hmmmm...

play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

sit in the shower

When I'm in a car and I hear a song on the radio, I always imagine myself performing it perfectly in front of a crowd even though I know I'd never be able to do that. I've done this since I was very young and still do.

Think of numbers as male or female.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.