Drinking and dialing people I dated.

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I don't leave the toilet in a public restroom until the other person leaves, so I don't have to make awkward eye contact.

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When you're out for a run, you pretend that someone is chasing after you so you run harder.

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I'm not a pessimist I'm a realist.

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If no one else is home and you have to go to the bathroom, but you're invested in what you're doing on your laptop, you take it with you.

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Embarassingly repeatedly use of the word "bro" when irritated or excited.

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When home alone, you feel the need to turn on every light/appliance so you won't hear the serial killer who you are sure hides in your basement

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While peeing, I will sometimes flush the toilet mid-stream and see if I can finish before it flushes all the way.

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google search random thoughts you have to see if they pop up.

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I look at this site and wonder if the thumbs up are all from people who actually do the same thing, or just people who like that or think it's a funny thing to do.

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As im about to fall asleep sometimes i feel like im falling and then i have a muscle spasem and wake up.

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setting your alarm early so that when you wake up you see you still have time to sleep and you're like YES!!!

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Use an entirely different vocabulary in your head than everyday life.

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Go through funny pictures and memes on Facebook, and then accidently miss one and ten when you click to go back you have to go through like 5 more to get back to the one you want.

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Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

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I have to make a breathing hole for fresh air to come in when I am laying under a hot blanket.

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See the person you like at school, have a quick random sexual thought about them, le random boner appears, and you flip out in your mind

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When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

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Pretend my ski pole is a gun while I'm on the chair lift. Or just any object around when I'm not skiing.

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Sex scene comes on TV while you are watching with your parents... Try to act normal... Fail.

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Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

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Realizing that when you look behind a shower curtain before using the bathroom and actually see a Serial killer, you have no plan...

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When leaving a poop smear under the water in the toilet that doesn't get flushed away, I put a few pieces of toilet paper on the water surface to conceal it.

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Scan forward to best parts of songs, rarely listen to entire song.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.