When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

Being fat

when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

I refuse to forward chain letters

When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

tell everyone that you think that mcdonalds is unhealthy and that you think there food is nasty but in reality you actually love it.

even though you know you turned the light off, you have to go check before you can get to sleep

dont wash hands for the recommended 30 seconds

smile when you find out that the things you only do is right.

I daydream and consequently spend twenty minutes having a dump

When listening to music I imagine myself and people in a movie scene that fits the music.

when bored, i imagine my EXACT plan for the zombie apocalypse, down to what would look cool if i was walking down a desolate street ( i am legend style) :D

When i'm home alone with the dog i have a conversation with the dog, sometimes in my head & sometimes out loud, in the voice that i think the dog would have if it could speak. Then sometimes i realise that i haven't checked if anybody else is home !

when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

I suck my shirt without realizing im doing it until people tell me.

When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.