I think Lois Griffin on Family Guy is hot!

thumb_up thumb_down -53

When I go to somewhere like France I always wittily comment to my friend " oh look at all those bloody foreigners as I have always thought they were tougher on immigrants

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Look at the toilet paper after i wipe my ass just to make sure i didn't leave anything behind..

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Going to a friends house for the weekend, coming home and checking the fridge/pantry for new foods.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Sometimes when I look at a clock the seconds hand ticks backwards

thumb_up thumb_down -32

really wonder why there is so much talk about pooping and farting on this site

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Take advantage of loud traffic to fart really hard.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

check for spiders under the toilet seat before taking a dump

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I feel that there is something sinister going on in government

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Think about the same confusing random dilemas that dont involve me every week and alwaus come to the same conclusion

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A lot of times I'll make up reasons for why different things happen even though I really have absolutely no idea.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

thumb_up thumb_down -95

Wave my hand at automatic doors just as they open pretending that I have Jedi powers

thumb_up thumb_down -1

When I walk past a homeless person asking for change, I avoid looking them in the eye and walk faster.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

pick nose in car and realize people can see you when stopped at a red light

thumb_up thumb_down -29

I sometimes deliberately missed buses and trains even if I could easily board them.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Wish that Mexicans would go to their OWN country and stop living tax free in OURS.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

wen on this website go look at the most disliked

thumb_up thumb_down -72

I wonder why the word ISLAND has an "S" in it?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

after a shower, try to shake the water off.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

sometimes if I am going on a flight to another country I will hold a small pocket of air in my mouth before getting on the plane and then I would let it out after we land

thumb_up thumb_down -148

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.