When the vacuum cleaner's going, I try to stay as far away from it and block the noise by shutting doors.

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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See a sexy girl, wanna go up and talk to her....cant think of anything cool to say and afraid of denial. Just me?

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Being fat

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when you are pooping you fart and it scares you a little bit.

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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I refuse to forward chain letters

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When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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when you are you a self flushing urinal/toilet you think it is a tiny camera and think someone is watching you so you rush to finish using the bathroom

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tell everyone that you think that mcdonalds is unhealthy and that you think there food is nasty but in reality you actually love it.

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even though you know you turned the light off, you have to go check before you can get to sleep

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dont wash hands for the recommended 30 seconds

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smile when you find out that the things you only do is right.

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I daydream and consequently spend twenty minutes having a dump

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When listening to music I imagine myself and people in a movie scene that fits the music.

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when bored, i imagine my EXACT plan for the zombie apocalypse, down to what would look cool if i was walking down a desolate street ( i am legend style) :D

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When i'm home alone with the dog i have a conversation with the dog, sometimes in my head & sometimes out loud, in the voice that i think the dog would have if it could speak. Then sometimes i realise that i haven't checked if anybody else is home !

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when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

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(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

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Whenever I'm outside playing a sport or something I pretend I have a tv show and I'm giving the audience a tutorial on how to do whatever I'm doing.

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Cringe when remembering something weird about you that happened years ago

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I suck my shirt without realizing im doing it until people tell me.

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When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.