Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk without insurance and crashing into legal citizens who pay taxes and insurance leaving us with a debt in medical bills so that we cant afford physical therapy.

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think about what im gonna say abillon times in my head before i say it -jesse

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Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

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Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

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bounce when your tip toeing.

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I pretend that my actions are perceived by a past self and they're always astounded by the change I've gone through.

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I stop the microwave at 1 second so that one someone else uses it it beeps

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While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

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If I'd see a grizzly bear in the forest I'd probably try to run away even though every sane person says that that's exactly the thing you shouldn't do

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Wipe the salt off your hand on your right pant leg after eating salty fries from fast food restaurants.

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Run up the stairs like a gorilla because it's easier that way.

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Agree with someones ridiculous political opinion just to avoid an argument.

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when you are waiting for something to load, you go "please,please,pleas,please,please,please...." and the when it finally finishes you yell "YES!" OF COURSE, ONLY WHEN YOUR ALONE.

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Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

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when my parents are gone i shout random stuff

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Think of the best come-backs ever, a few seconds after the time to use them would be.

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When an ice cube fall on the floor I kick it under the fridge.

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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Solving your problems in bed before sleeping and then forgetting all of the solutions when you wake up. This applies to games, homework, and world hunger.

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My hands are always so cold and clamy at school, when I go on dates, and when im with friends. But, of course, when im at home, they.are.normal. :l

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I never find things funny unless I'm in a completely silent room, and it is then that I think or see something funny and begin to almost cry of laughter.

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Walking down the toy isle in the store, and feeling a little sad that you're not a kid anymore.

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go to the bathroom, turn on the hot water, get undressed so that the water has time to heat up

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.