Someone asks you "what's up" and you awkwardly reply "good".

Walk around aimlessly when talking on the phone.

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Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

I look at people and think, "they poop" then as I'm imagining them pooping I hurry and change thoughts before they finish.

Wake up, unnaturally hungry, make meal fit for a king.

Talks to yourself in your head then replies to yourself out loud nikki

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interview yourself over some amazing accomplishment you achieved like becoming the youngest emmy winner and pretending you're really humble.

Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

The volume level on my TV has to be either an even number or a multiple of five.

Sing really loudly and think you hear someone come in. yell "hello" for five minutes before singing again.

whenever you walk into the bathroom with your phone/laptop/electronic device you stay sitting on the toilet even though you are done because you are so engaged with whatever you are doing

reading thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com at the office when you're supposed to be working then checking that the guy next to you doesn't notice. and quickly clicking a different tab when someone is walking or standing nearby.

I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

Open Fridge, look around for few seconds, say to self - 'What the f*** am I doing?'

take 2 coffes in 2 seconds cause dont remember the first coffee! o.O

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

Looking up 'How to tell if your crush likes you' to get assurance that he/she loves you

Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

Singing alone in the car and then stopping, scared that there is an audio recorder in the car recording you singing.

Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

Shudder when someone bites down on icey poll or an ice cube

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.