when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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While I Am on the computer late at night, my Mum tells me to go to bed, I say I will in a second. I stay for a few more minutes, my mum tells me again, I do the same thing...

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Sometimes I see on the clock, the seconds needle go back 1 second and then never do that again for the rest of the day/week or whenever I'm staring at the clock for it to happen again. -Mike

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When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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Go for a 10 mile run.

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Love to check my astrological compatibility with my favorite musicians.

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Being fat

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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taking a shit while brushing my teeth.

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Get to lazy to stand up in the shower so I sit down in the shower

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See a news article that looks interesting, too lazy to read the whole thing. Skim.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Say the Lord's name in vain, then say "sorry God" under my breath right after.

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make south park refferences every day

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Too lazy to exercise. Think to self "I'm gonna work out tomorrow." - instantly feel better about self. Still didn't exercise.

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When watching a video or listening to music, take earbuds out four or five times in repetition to make sure that no one can hear the audio but you, then check them again when someone comes within twenty feet of you. Then, spend the rest of the time feeling awkward and expecting someone to jump out of the bushes and take a video of that idiot with the defective headphones.

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Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

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Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

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When listening to music on computer make sure your singing the words and act cool just incase the singer of that song and some other people you admire are watching you threw your webcam.

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when im losing an argument, ill start singing my responses

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When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.