get so shitfaced you wake up in a closet with piss everywhere

Praying to God even though you tell people you're an Atheist.

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

repeat what you just said 2 seconds ago in a group conversation thinking no one heard you

Text random people saying I'm pregnant

When I masturbate I trade hands often in fear that my penis may become crooked.

I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

When I walk from one room to the next, I make believe that the room I just left exploded, and that I made it out just in time.

do things without turning the lights on and feel like a ninja.

Before going to bed look around the dark room and when you see something suspicious you have a look to see its not a person

I walk into a room and forget why I'm in there.

I never even met you! Why do you care who I'm talking to?

Talk to my cat.

Play as both sides on fifa

When I have a good dream I can't remember it the day after, but I can remember another dream I had a year ago.

Bathroom occupied, piss in the kitchen sink.

In the shower, or just when I'm alone, I imagine having confrontations with people in my life and play out the entire conversation by myself, lip syncing the words with emotions and all.

I can't brush my teeth with the toilet lid up.

I sometimes rub my scalp rapidly and watch my dandruff fall down like snow.

I hate being called "buddy".

Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

whenever I see those commercials where there is two people talking to each other but they constantly look at me it really irritates me

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.