i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

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I invented this game in the bathroom called "start peeing before the light fully lightens up".Its kind of a challenge because if i actually succeed i might not pee in the right place.

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spank it during my commute if I am in traffic

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

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Yelling my cats name in my mind to see if i can get him to look at me using the power of my mind

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i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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In britain,everytime i see a magpie i got to do this silly ritual and salute and say good morning mr magpie (depending on wat time of day it is) and make sure 2 ppl see it at the same time or something bad will happen.then someone will tell me another one i should do and i add it on! Its never ending.

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because fuck the NSA.

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Typing what you want to put in a message, then deleting it because you daren't send it

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When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

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Look at every individual line on my hands and see if they are identicle

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when in the car with just one parent i get very cautious about what im thinking cuz i feel like they r reading my mind

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when going through this website only read post that have 2 or more thumbs up

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putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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I take pains to be Anti-Democrat and Anti-Republican. Because both parties are really gross money & career machines beholden to industry. I really am middle-of-the-road on lots of issues. even though I don't understand what the fuck makes an intelligent conservative tick. but I may just be biased because it's all neo-cons on the news. idk.

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think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

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seeing small spots in your eye (dust probably) and then chasing them with your eye trying to catch them

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I hate being called "buddy".

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Eat my shed skin from a sunburn

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If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

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When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

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When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.