Think about my life as a book when I'm in public, for example "I then walked over to my friend to say hello to him."

When someone is reading something out loud in class...and they are reading REALLY slow...You quietly read fast and you try to beat them to the end of the paragraph

Search through the most popular section of this website trying to find my one

Go through funny pictures and memes on Facebook, and then accidently miss one and ten when you click to go back you have to go through like 5 more to get back to the one you want.

On Youtube, while reading comments notice that many people reply angrily to the same person. Wonder what they said that pissed so many people off. Try to find them in earlier posts, but fail. Live the rest of the night in depressive state.

When I see a typo ANYWHERE, I feel compelled to correct it, even if there is no possible way for me to correct it

Take a side of bacon and jack off watching Babe.

Imagine that other people see colors different from me and if i had their brain i would see it like them

I fantasize about my idol as I try to fall sleep at night. He's Michael Jackson.

right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

I put toilet paper in first before i poop, so the water dosent splash me.

when you're texting in class and you realize you are staring at your crotch and smiling.

Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

Trying not to fart when laughing is challenging.

get caught up in youtube comment arguments

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

Hate to type Morals under each one of my posts Moral: A small chick in the hand is better than a huge C**K up your ass. I am pretty sure not even women nor homosexuals want birds up there...Then again, I havent searched for anything like that at the intern... they are eating her! And now they are gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! (fly stuck on head)

I am sure that no one else has the same mental slowness as me and my brother. When I say mauve he says maeve and we continue like this for hours. It is certainly an exciting way of eating up those motorway miles:)

Say 'WED', 'NES' and 'DAY' slowly in your head when spelling Wednesday.

Drinking and dialing people I dated.

I use the power-stance sometimes when I poop. It's where you completely remove one leg from your pants and put the shoe back on. Your legs can go further apart.

When I have to use my hands to eat my steak, chew the bones etc (do not tell me that so far this is weird and unusual :P ) I wipe my fingers after each touch => use a whole pack of table tissues :D

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.