I want to hire a private investigator to follow a private investigator who was hired to follow the first investigator.

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text somebody something and if they don't reply quickly, resend that same text.

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Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

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Showering with my uncle Jarrett <3

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You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

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Leave those last one or two sheets of toilet paper after taking a crap just so you don't have to replace it.

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after seeing toy story, and watching that toys moved and talked to each other when the humans werent around, thinking that toys are really like that when you gone, and when you go back to you room, the toys rush back into their spots.

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Buy something and try to save it for an event of some kind and end up failing to do so, every darn time too.

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Sometimes I think about what I would do if I accidentally killed someone. I don't want to kill anyone, but if I did it accidentally. Would I call an ambulance, hide the body, confess to police, destroy evidence, etc?

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Touching your nipples at night wondering if anyone else wanted to touch them all day :)

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Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

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ask my dog questions then realize, she can't talk...

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Realize you are dreaming and try to wake yourself up.

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scratch that bit between my balls and arse when it gets itchy, then carry on scratching for ages cos it feels so damn good

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When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

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Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

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Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Everytime I have ear buds in and I hear myself breathing, I think others can hear it too so I slow my breathing or hold my breath.

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When taking a dump in a public restroom, if someone else walks in, I wait until they leave the restroom before finishing up and leaving the stall, just to make sure they don't see who I am.

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Play my music so low in public that I can hardly hear it in my headphones for fear of others being able to hear what I'm listening to.

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Thinking you can do parkour even when you cant and the have a friend over and try to show off

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Like a toy until it breaks.

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Look at the least popular comments just out of interest

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.