Takes playful flirting way to seriouse.

thumb_up thumb_down -92

Sometimes I won't do something just to see how long it takes before someone else does it (dishes, throw something away, fill the ice cube tray, etc.).

thumb_up thumb_down -24

When I go to use my laptop if my cat is sleeping in my chair I would use it somewhere else and leave her alone.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Pretend i'm a sim.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Try to time the traffic light so that when I snap, my light turns green. Always so so close.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

eating a sandwich with strategically placed bites such that i get the same ratio of crust to tastier non-crust sandwich center in each bite. sometimes i just take two smaller bites of crust and center part so that i don't have to taste mostly bread crust in a mouthful.

thumb_up thumb_down -66

I got a lot of high rated entries, but they dont contain Moral: This.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

i try to spit onto my line of piss while going to the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down -87

I sometimes wonder what my past self would do differently if it knew what would be going on now

thumb_up thumb_down -22

To my comment below... Rest im peace MJ... Shhh! Mary Jane is resting!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

When I have a bottle in my hand and nothing to do in class. I read the nutrition facts and ingredients 2 to 4 times until the teacher says something.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I really enjoy taking a shit and dont really know why.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Get the feeling that somebody is going to grab your foot when you walk by a bed in the dark...

thumb_up thumb_down -39

When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I'll imagine that I'm having a conversation with a celebrity, and either giving them advice or telling them why I hate them and calling them out on bullshit.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

I was the real Stig...

thumb_up thumb_down -94

Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

thumb_up thumb_down +13

That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

thumb_up thumb_down -35

getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

thumb_up thumb_down -51

I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Listening to music walking through town and feeling like you're in a music video

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Poo really loud

thumb_up thumb_down -47

My parents are annoying.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.