always picture someone naked even though sometime you really don't want to.

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Everytime I get new magazines or brochures in the mail I like to open them and smell them. Same with new electronics, I love that new smell.

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When I read something someone you know has written I read it in their voice.

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Show up for a blind date and say DAMN, WTF! When they open the door.

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sit closer to the water so my poop isn't so loud..

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In case you have the ears pierced, take out the piece, and smell it, even if it smells so bad, you like the how it smells... lol

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Fire imaginary rocket launchers at passenger planes flying overhead, then panic thinking what if it really blows up?

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I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

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That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

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close one eye or the other to move an object near by when I'm bored -Noel

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I have seen a UFO

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I think of unbelievably perverted things seconds before I am about to cum when masturbating.

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incognito mode on google chrome

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I have a phobia of incest

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Dad, what's that dark place over there? That's Chorley son, you must never go there.

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Archer's Pam poovey, Lana Kane and Malory makes me horny

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whenever I lost a tooth my parents would while I slept they would sprinkle caster sugar on the window sill and make footprints in it (tiny footprints)

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When does eating pop corn, take apart the bag and lick all the extra butter.

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At night, everytime when i walk past that curtain lampost, it goes off.

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singing along to a song that you think you know the words to.. but you dont

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When your best friend has a certain make/model/color car, you start seeing it everywhere you go.

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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watch cartoons even though most of my friends don't

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open the fridge A eat food B think

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.