I only used to eat McCoys Salt & Vinegar crisps when it was raining, because I thought they tasted better when it rains. Anyone else?

Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

When you trip when your walking you try to play it off like you wanted to start running

Realize you are dreaming and try to wake yourself up.

I can't piss with my shoes on.

feed a gecko worms every day, not the good worms though...

I stop the microwave at 1 second so that one someone else uses it it beeps

When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

after a shower, try to shake the water off.

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

If someone uses a term thats like, in the know, and they ask if i know what it means, ill act like, of course ido, even if i dont, and then ill go home and look it up.

Laugh harder when trying to explain what you are laughing about

I pick at my cuticles when I'm bored.

The power to put a pointless super power on thingsyouthinkonlyyoudo.com

When I drink out of a disposable coffee cup with a lid, the opening on the lid has be on the exact opposite side from the seam where the cup is glued to form the cylinder.

I don't like to answer the phone because it is never for me.

Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

Think about past screw ups, then cross my eyes thinking to myself "I'm such a F---ing retard."

Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

When I'm cooking, I mumble everything I'm doing under my breath like I'm in a cooking show and I'm talking to the audience.

look at old toys from when you were a kid and remember how they taste.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.