I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because f*ck the NSA.

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What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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Start browsing a list of pics at the back, so I can see the order they were posted.

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Happy April 28th everyone! Today is the first day of the rest of your lives, a time for new beginnings to run wild, a time to put a final ending to the past mistakes and troubling thoughts that may have been clouding your mind for far too long until now... The time is here, The time is now, Today is the day, Right here, right now, Right this moment, This is the right time... This, IS THE TIME TO DECIDE... To take time to make time, and let time pass by while you try to decide on how you wanna live your life? Falling into the same patterns as time before, and as will be, time after time? OR, simply, you can choose to LIVE... letting yourself have the time of YOUR LIFE!!! =) The choice is yours, what will you decide??? <3

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Open the microwave door exactly when your food ends.

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Breathe.

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turn off the tv by accident and then turn it on only to find that it takes forever to work again

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trying to piss after masturbation hurts.

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Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

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Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

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I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

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Walk around downtown and spot good camping spots or sniping spots, cause life is a FPS.

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I always have to watch the credits of a movie even, though everyone else has left the theatre and there are people cleaning up the seats, which makes me think, they think i'm crazy.

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Have to take the phone with you everytime to the bathroom

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read on youtube comments with too unlikes

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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

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go to the bathroom, turn on the hot water, get undressed so that the water has time to heat up

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I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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I ejaculate fire and glory

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.