when i take a shit and smoke i dont throw the cigar in the wc so the smoke wont come to my nose

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I sometimes wonder what my past self would do differently if it knew what would be going on now

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Walking down stairs. Accidently miss last step. Feel like you're going to die.

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"I'll start tomorrow..." wake up and it has been a year later and I still haven't done it.

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Not doing any work Feel guilty about it Then still do no work

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i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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I flush the toilet if the water's green and I'm going to have a poo, so it doesn't splash me.

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hold my shirt with my chin when i'm peeing.

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When I turn the volume up or Down it has to be a number with 0 or 5 in

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

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has a plastic bag full of plastic bags in your house

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

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On the bus think in your mind "I know you're reading my mind right now," and look for reactions.

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Every room I go into I imagine like there's one of those DVD screen savers that bounces off the walls and i try to guess when it will hist a corner perfectly

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Fantasize about being with somebody else when I have sex

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Think that everything has feelings for example, a cushion or a tree

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I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

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Put the towel near the shower so that you can stand on it and not get the floor wet

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Count how long it takes before you stop peeing.

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Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.