- Things You Think Only You Do

I get more creeped out the more I read the comments here, especially as the comments start getting really low thumbs ups.

you spread your cheeks apart when you sit on the the tolet so that your poop does not touch your cheaks

When your best friend has a certain make/model/color car, you start seeing it everywhere you go.

Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

Rubbing your scalp and watching your dandruff fall like snowflakes

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I never did certain things like move to a new house or attended a certain school or college. I wonder if I still would have met the people who are in my life now. I think about If I never met my best friends, people who are like family to me. Then I get really sad because it's something I never want to imagine. Afterwards, I talk to them to cheer myself up.

Whenever I go to a new place, I look around and carefully plan my escape route in case of zombies.

When I'm peeing in the urinal, I aim to the side so it doesn't deflect back on me.

Hate to type Morals under each one of my posts Moral: A small chick in the hand is better than a huge C**K up your ass. I am pretty sure not even women nor homosexuals want birds up there...Then again, I havent searched for anything like that at the intern... they are eating her! And now they are gonna eat me! OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD! (fly stuck on head)

After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

feel that the horsehead network captchas can read my mind. kind of scary.

strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

When in bed, I fold a small section of the covers in my hand to make a point and poke my fingers with it.

When I remember something embarrassing I did or even something someone else did, I will yell random words. It started just with gasping but now I have like 5 words that I'll say randomly. It's evolved to include stressful or disturbing thoughts and not just embarrassing things. I have a pretty stressful life so I'm basically continuously making random sounds then looking around terrified that someone's heard.

Hate Skydoesminecraft.

After having an argument with your partner you text them later then halfway thru the text you forget hat you were going to say back track and tell them you love them! "didn't matter really did it lol"

Think something you shouldn't about someone, stop thinking about it in case they read your mind, and then, as an added precaution, think "I know you listening".

Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

When I'm in a room with other people, no matter who they are, I make myself choose the person I would tolerate the best having sex with just in case of a disaster and we need to procreate.

1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.