I pretend that my actions are perceived by a past self and they're always astounded by the change I've gone through.

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as you walk down the street, you pretend that all of the people were zombies and you pretend you have a gun and give them headshots (even imitate the gunshot with your mouth) -MATT

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The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

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interview yourself over some amazing accomplishment you achieved like becoming the youngest emmy winner and pretending you're really humble.

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While listening to music, I imagine an insanely huge dance number to go along with it.

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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if your listening to music, move the volume up and down to experience the bass a lil better

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Walk into a public bathroom and go to the urinal, but then stop and think theres some guy who will perv on you and then go in the cubicle.

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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I turn on the faucet or turn up the radio in the bathroom so maybe no one can hear me pee.

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There's this reassuring voice in my head. She's almost like a mother, telling me that it'll be alright and that I have things to do.

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I want to suck on your penis

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Happy April 28th everyone! Today is the first day of the rest of your lives, a time for new beginnings to run wild, a time to put a final ending to the past mistakes and troubling thoughts that may have been clouding your mind for far too long until now... The time is here, The time is now, Today is the day, Right here, right now, Right this moment, This is the right time... This, IS THE TIME TO DECIDE... To take time to make time, and let time pass by while you try to decide on how you wanna live your life? Falling into the same patterns as time before, and as will be, time after time? OR, simply, you can choose to LIVE... letting yourself have the time of YOUR LIFE!!! =) The choice is yours, what will you decide??? <3

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Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

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put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

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Solving your problems in bed before sleeping and then forgetting all of the solutions when you wake up. This applies to games, homework, and world hunger.

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When I walk the streets after getting a new haircut, I think everybody's staring at me and thinking "oh my god she got a new haircut" eventhough they didn't know me before.

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I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

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Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

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feel disappointed when i find out that a p0rn scene is just the actor's dream or imagination.

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I constantly get itches. On awkward parts of my body. In public places. And it's torture.

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On Youtube, while reading comments notice that many people reply angrily to the same person. Wonder what they said that pissed so many people off. Try to find them in earlier posts, but fail. Live the rest of the night in depressive state.

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When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.