For some reason some guy at the office started calling me "Biggus Dickus" and that became my nickname from there on... ...Cant help but smirk whenever my female employees gather and ask one another "But what is that Biggus Dickus guys real name? Is he really "Biggus Dickus? Such a strange name, should we call him Biggus Dickus or? etc" Nero the clit collector: AND THEY WONDER WHY I REFUSE TO TELL THEM MY REAL NAME XD They even have bets to see which one can guess "Biggus Dickus`s" real name... ...WHAT? YOU COLLECT STAMPS! THATS TWICE AS CRUEL... Besides you got like ten, I got about 300.005.

everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

smell your socks cause you like the smell of your own sweat

Every time I see my self in a mirror, I feel like I'm watching someone in a different dimension and make quick movements to see if they mess up.

Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

I walk down the stairs sideways because I'm afraid something will get me.

Wanting to marry Tyler Joseph but then you remember he's married :(

only feel the need to click one of the related sites that draws you after youve clicked 'next page'

Get longingly desperate feeling for days/weeks after a concert of my favorite band.

When I am walking at night, I see a slight shadow behind me for a second, I walk faster, I see the shadow again, I think it is some kind of scary monster and then I decide to run for my life. When I get back home, I realize the shadow is my shadow.

stare at a word and try to sound it out backwards to see if it spells something backwards.

When i'm in a classroom I think about all of the possible ways to save everyone if something bad happens.

Absentmindedly rub your stomach while lying down watching or reading.

Every time I see a pretty girl,the first thing I think is how I'd love to pin her down and tickle her.

I always feel as if someone is always watching me on a screen where ever I am, and every person in the world is also being watched as well

imagine squeezing your bladder in your hand when your peeing.

When I get a worksheet or a piece of paper with BIG TITLES I immediately shade in all of the gaps in the o's, p's, d's and all other 'hole letters'. And then I start shading in all the words when I finish.

When I'm at someone else's house, clutter sort of bothers me and it makes me want to clean up. At my own house, it feels really weird if there's a lack of clutter, so I like to keep it that way.

When I pee if there is already some toilet paper there I try to sink it with my pee.

when making thing only you think you do you never read the terms of service

you spread your cheeks apart when you sit on the the tolet so that your poop does not touch your cheaks

So has anyone else ever been in the middle of doing something and at the exact moment something happens and you sort of wonder if it happened because of what you did.

Thinking, "What is wrong with this generation"

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.