When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

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Not being able to balance in heels because the insides are smothered in foot sweat. -_-

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Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

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Open Fridge, look around for few seconds, say to self - 'What the f*** am I doing?'

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I think of who will I save if a killer come to school

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make sure you hit every crack in the sidewalk evenly. slowly over time, you discover that you found an awkward walking pace to match the obsession.

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When the font allows it, try to hide the cursor in capital I's.

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I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

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Refreshing captcha codes for five minutes straight until you find reasonably legible letters.

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When something you're sat on makes a noise that sounds like a FART. So you try and do the noise again, to make sure people are aware that the noise was the chair and not you!

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Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

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When I'm cooking, I mumble everything I'm doing under my breath like I'm in a cooking show and I'm talking to the audience.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I have mixed emotions when I drop a piece of food on the ground, like a chicken nugget, M&M, scoop of ice cream, etc - because part of me thinks it is sad because its only goal in life was to be eaten... but then the other part of me is happy for it, because it is possible that it *didn't* want to be eaten and has just made a successful escape. O_o

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftcodes.info <

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play with a laser pointer and pretend its a lightsaber

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Create scenarios when you are standing around/ waiting for someone in public (ie. pretending you are sending a text to someone), in fear of what people may think if they see you standing around doing nothing.

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When I hear something that I could make a great comeback to (if it was directed towards me), I saw it under my breath just to feel full fiilled

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Miss the bus, keep running pretending I was going somewhere else.

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When im going from one room to the next, i try and get into the other room before the door to the last room closes. If i do, I've won.

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Wonder why every single kid is looking at you in a restaurant.

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I have a phobia of incest

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While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.