I hump my bed at night and pretend it's a hot model

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ask my dog questions then realize, she can't talk...

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I trap my farts under the covers and sniff them all up or cup them in my hand and sniff real hard to get the smell.

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I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

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Always fantasize about grabbing a cop's gun from his holster. Just because I am pretty sure I could.

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Have to take the phone with you everytime to the bathroom

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in silences, freak, thinking someone can read your mind and tell them off in your head

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I only used to eat McCoys Salt & Vinegar crisps when it was raining, because I thought they tasted better when it rains. Anyone else?

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I've had a problem all my life with people thinking I'm a boy, (I'm a girl) so when I first meet someone, my instinct is to find some reason, (however stupid) to say that I'm a girl, (EX: "Can you believe that people actually think I'm a boy?" like when I just meet them).

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Having sudden realizations that you are a person who exists.

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I put my finger in jars of jam/yoghurt/honey etc then lick the finger and repeat and hope nobody see's me.

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Look at just about ANYTHING you see in the context of a zombie apocalypse. Example: strategizing escape routes and barricade points while you're walking down the hallway in school, or looking at something ordinary, like a baseball bat, and thinking, 'I could bash some zombie brains with that'

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disgusted by people that are obsessed with poo and pee

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sometimes i sing and when i do , i make drum sounds with my teeth and you know, all that stuff

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when my mum buys way too much of something I imagine were one of those 'doomsday preppers' families, with mounds of supplies in our basement.

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Gotta sleep with a fan.

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try to give your friends spirit animals

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When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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pick leaves of bushes while im walking and rip them up into small pieces

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Set Fire to the Rain

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Before I meet someone I've never met before, I think of stuff to say or do to prevent it from being awkward, but when I finally meet them I do none of the things I thought about doing.

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when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

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Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

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use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.