I never feel bored

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i leave tv on when i sleep...cant close it cause i hate to hear....noices...in my bedroom that cant identify......

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Wanting to change your name to Peter Jankins

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sometimes when i'm talking to myself and someone walks in the room i have to make them believe what i'm saying is a song!!

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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I say random stuff when I wake up. Just to make sure my voice is still working.

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SOMETIMES I SHIT ON MY HAND.... IN THE SHOWER

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Having small fingers and, regardless, still unable to click on the right thing when on the internet with a touch screen phone.

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Can't stop tears from comeing to your eyes when singing

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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When I see interactive ads on webpages ( "Shoot 5 iPhones And Get One Free!" type of windows ), I feel compelled to finish the task, even though I KNOW it's going to open a pop-up and waste 10 seconds of my life.

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think up the funniest jokes right before i go to sleep and cant think of them the next day

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Wondering how you look to other people and adjusting your clothes and posture so you don't feel as unatractive as you think you are, but aren't.

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If i've been thinking about a particular person a lot, afterwards if people are telling a story or describing a scenario, I always picture the person I was thinking of before as the person as the main character in their story/scenario.

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When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

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Listen to music while browsing the internet, having facebook open in another tab, and randomly you hear facebook message sounds, even though they aren't really there.

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Every time i find an insect in my basement i grab it put it in the toilet and pee on it victoriously while its being flushed down. But Im a nice guy, and i worry about this evil hatred i have towards insects.

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When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

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Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

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try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

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Find a really good joke on the internet and pretend you came up with it to make your friends think you're funny

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Use head & "Shoulders" for pubic hair

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When a stripper sucks you so hard that the tip of your penis gets circumcised

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.