- Things You Think Only You Do

I flip the pillow at night to feel the cool sensation.

saying long strings of unconnected words in your head and wondering if you just said something that noone else ever has

Hit the enter key really hard when finishing a long piece of text that you have just written.

Create scenarios when you are standing around/ waiting for someone in public (ie. pretending you are sending a text to someone), in fear of what people may think if they see you standing around doing nothing.

When I wait for something to load, I right click and then quickly try to drag a box around the right click box before it disappears. Then I try to right click and drag and see if I can outline the right click box before it appears.

i masturbate with my feet

If I'm home alone, I tell myself good night when I am getting cozy in bed. I even use my name.

Laying in bed kind of hungry, knowing exactly what you want to eat, and going over all the steps involved (going all the way to the kitchen, making the food, cleaning up, going all the way back to your room, plus it's nighttime and something might get you) and trying to decide whether or not it's worth it to go eat now or just wait until you wake up.

Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

Seriously I am tired but, I read the fucking solvemedia stating "forget this", then I stood there for a moment having just forgot what I was supposed to type. "Was I not supposed to forget what I just read?" Nero: BRAINWASHING! FORGET THIS AND LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR MOTHER! IM LEUTANANT BANGUS YOUR MUTHERUS YOU IDIOT!

Moisturize "down there" after a really drying wipe session.

When one of those sad sappy abused dogs commercials comes on, you change the channel really fast to prevent from crying.

I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

When you are speaking to someone with a distinct accent and suddenly take on the accent as your own when responding. - Missy Chemick

When driving along in the car, imagining crashing and another car coming into you and the repercussions of it all.

Whenever I got hurt I used to just run like that would stop the pain

I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

When I stop thinking about about something it'll turn out that I've been staring at someone without meaning to.

Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

Think about past screw ups, then cross my eyes thinking to myself "I'm such a F---ing retard."

Manage to be more AWESOME! THAN YOU IN EVERY SINGLE WAY! YES YOU! YOU DONT HIDE FROM ME! YEAH CHANGE THE PAGE LIKE THE PUSSY YOU ARE, COME OVER HERE INTO THE SCREEN (NOT HOME IM NAKED AND NOT IN THE MOOD FOR RAPING NOW SO YEAH ANYWAY) MORAL; THE ORIGINAL NOT THE CULT MORAL CODE FUCK ASSHOLE OKAY? DO I SEEM LIKE I WANT A CULT? OR THAT I JUST WANT TO CHAINSAW THE HEAD OF YOUR DOG AND PACK IT IN A NICE GIFT BOX FOR YOU? HUUUUUH!?

Buy tons of movies and only watch them once. Rarely buy books and reread them a million times.

Try to make a turd that touches the bottom of the toilet before it breaks off.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.