When I do something stupid and people are around I hope that nobody saw me and I never tell anyone what I did. But if i do something stupid and I am alone I feel I have to tell somebody.

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I tend to stand in front of mirrors and stare at myself to the point of my face changing to a more evil look than normal and freaking myself out, and forcing myself to either look away, or down.

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think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Spend several minutes to write a comment on a website, only to decide not no submit it after all.

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Likes that girggle sound you make after a burp.

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i put a empty pack of cigarettes under my pillow and hoped the cigarette fairy would come when i was asleep

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I think about fat women while poking my skinny girlfriend

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Get excited when your friends think your favorite song is cool.

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because fuck the NSA.

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Typing what you want to put in a message, then deleting it because you daren't send it

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when in the car with just one parent i get very cautious about what im thinking cuz i feel like they r reading my mind

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Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

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I take pains to be Anti-Democrat and Anti-Republican. Because both parties are really gross money & career machines beholden to industry. I really am middle-of-the-road on lots of issues. even though I don't understand what the fuck makes an intelligent conservative tick. but I may just be biased because it's all neo-cons on the news. idk.

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think that the NSA is always watching what you do online at any time you are even connected.

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I hate being called "buddy".

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Eat my shed skin from a sunburn

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If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

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When you had a crush on a girl in elementary school, then don't see her in middle school and think of how much of a bitch she was. Then You start crushing on her again in high school.

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When you know your alone, you still have to check the whole house.

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Pick your dead skin then eat it.

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When I'm in a public place with a lot of people, I sometimes imagine myself being an epic hero saving everyone there from a monster or some sort of bad guy.

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get annoyed by people singing a song only to show off their brilliant voice and automatically think that they cannot sing as good as they think they can

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Wonder what would happen if you started screaming and defecating in public.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.