Rubbing the corners of your lips on the side of your hand and smelling it.

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try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

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In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

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only read the short jokes on this website

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When I'm listening to a sad song that relates to my life while I'm walking all alone, I mouth the words and pretend I'm in a music video.

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Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

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Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

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I **** with no hands.

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Saving some leftovers of your favorite food .... the next week its still there (:

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At the gym, I always try to do 5 pounds more than the previous person.

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I never find things funny unless I'm in a completely silent room, and it is then that I think or see something funny and begin to almost cry of laughter.

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If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

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thinking that the 'writing comments procedure' on this website is extremely irritating.

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When I am in class or somewhere boring I start getting thoughts of weird senerios like a group of zombies swamping the place or being hit by an earthquake etc and being one of the surivors. But then i realise that the possibility of that happening is incredibly slim and get depressed. Bananas!

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When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

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Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

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After eating a sandwich, eat the leftover sesame seeds one-by-one.

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Drinking and dialing people I dated.

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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When going to the bathroom, lock it and when trying to unlock and don't succeed immediately... ITS A TRAP! I'M LOCKED IN MY OWN BATHROOM!!

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When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.