Try to imagine every couple I see having sex.

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When I go to bed, I imagine how I would deal with intruders, then I can't sleep.

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jump down the stairs when im almost down to save time

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Post one on this site thinking everyone will love you but then you realize you're the 2,833 person to post on this site and no one will ever see it. If this is still where it was when I posted it, then congratulations! You've read through 300 FUCKING PAGES! (that meant go get a job)

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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When watching a heavy action movie and you suddenly start thinking about how much it would cost to repair the damages made in the movie.

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Go through funny pictures and memes on Facebook, and then accidently miss one and ten when you click to go back you have to go through like 5 more to get back to the one you want.

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You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

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whenever someone pulls up beside you in another car, you are fully aware of them, but never look at them, your too cool to care what they look like.

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I T-bag my teammates in MW3 when they die.

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i can't watch the t.v. unless the volume ends in a 0 or 5

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I have mixed emotions when I drop a piece of food on the ground, like a chicken nugget, M&M, scoop of ice cream, etc - because part of me thinks it is sad because its only goal in life was to be eaten... but then the other part of me is happy for it, because it is possible that it *didn't* want to be eaten and has just made a successful escape. O_o

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When bored, I often fold pieces of paper to make a little point and poke my fingers/hands with it.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Take out all the marshmallows in a bowl of Lucky Charms, eat the "cat food" (the dry cereal that looks like dry kitty food!), then put the marshmallows back in the milk and eat them!

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I turn on the faucet or turn up the radio in the bathroom so maybe no one can hear me pee.

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

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When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

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i wonder why someone decided to spell words unusually for example why couldn't because be spelt becuz the way it sounds?!

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When im alone i rub myself in vasaline and pretend that im a slug on the kitchen floor.

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Go back to the song if I don't here what they sang Kay

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Pee in the garbage at night when I don't want to wake the whole house up.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.