fist myself to the point of unconsciousness whilst masturbating to the speeches of Hitler

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When I'm walking on the sidewalk, I try to count and keep a steady rate of how many times I step on each slab of concrete.

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whenever i'm talking about someone, i constantly check my phone to make sure i haven't butt-dialed them and they're listening to everything i'm saying about them!

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When I'm running a bath I sometimes sit and look at myself in the mirror and act out conversations with people I've never talked to or celebrities, and when I say something that sounds good I'll repeat it over and over again until I nail huge emotions on my face.

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i would air drum even if theres no music playing

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I get mad at characters on tv and i shoot the screen with my Nerf gun

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Always think good thoughts before I go to bed so that I have good dreams

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In my head, my life is some kind of on-going documentary about my life. Sometimes when I'm alone, I conduct interviews.

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Looking at these in school when it's dead silent and trying so hard not to laugh so you won't get yelled at.

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Not get any thumb ups on a post. Turns out there really are some things only I do...

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taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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Pretend that i don't care about my birthday when i actually can't wait to see what present people will get me and get terribly excited everytime someone text me

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I have mixed emotions when I drop a piece of food on the ground, like a chicken nugget, M&M, scoop of ice cream, etc - because part of me thinks it is sad because its only goal in life was to be eaten... but then the other part of me is happy for it, because it is possible that it *didn't* want to be eaten and has just made a successful escape. O_o

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When using the bathroom count the tiles on the floor or shower wall or read a shampoo bottle.

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Mix my coffee with the spoon upside down.

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Abuse your pet when nobody's looking

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not be afraid of hurricane sandy

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push a fart out really slow so you think nobody will hear it

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When theres a car just like yours right next to your car in the parking lot you almoat always gravitate to that car instead. It's the worst when there people in the car and you keep trying to open it.

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sometimes when I'm eating, I eat with the opposite side of my mouth. just to be fair to it.

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Think about the things you could do if you had the power to stop the time.

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Sometimes i think i've been living a dream life, and one day im really gonna wake up in the middle of 9th grade math class and have to explain why i was sleeping on my desk and jerking off so much.

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Playing with your phone or remote throwinng it up and down until it hits your face

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ask my dog questions then realize, she can't talk...

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.