My most intimate moments are constantly interrupted by the same thought..."oh, God...what if there is a secret security cam in here...CUT TO: oh God...can my dead grandparents see me now????"

thumb_up thumb_down +142

If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

thumb_up thumb_down -40

While reading these posts on here, I find that I do a lot of weird things that I've never really thought about.

thumb_up thumb_down +762

I used to eat bath bubbles

thumb_up thumb_down -26

When I'm home alone at night I check around the corners to make sure there isn't anyone there

thumb_up thumb_down -36

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

thumb_up thumb_down -53

I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

When someone enters the room while i'm playing a game, start playing the best song of the game soundtrack so they notice it and think the game has a cool soundtrack.

thumb_up thumb_down -79

get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I think Frozen is an overrated film

thumb_up thumb_down -51

When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Inspect the shower, bath or toilet, then washing it until you believe it is suitable to use.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Sleep with pillow between legs

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Still can't walk on cracks. If I step on the crack with one foot, the other has to as well.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Pee in my work garbage can.

thumb_up thumb_down +580

When you need something from someone and you forget what it's called,So then you have to awkwardly explain it.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Pee sitting down so I dont have to aim

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.