Stick my hand all the way to the bottom of a tub of grease.

Saying or doing something stupid, then later replaying it in your head and wanting to punch yourself in the face for it, then coming up with different ideas on how you could have been less stupid. -B

Force a piss out really hard because you're in a rush.

Forget a seemingly simple word. Shout it out at random 3 days later...(don't tell me you don't do this)

When you stop to tie you shoe, you re-tie the other so one isnt tighter than the other.

Someone waves at me and I wave back...and then I realize they were waving at someone behind me.

Whenever I think of something creative or weird, I always wonder if someone thought of the same thing.

Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

While waiting for my food ot cook, I'll wash the dirty dishes that I used so that I don't need to wash lots of dishes after I eat.

When watching a heavy action movie and you suddenly start thinking about how much it would cost to repair the damages made in the movie.

Whenever I cross the road with someone I try to walk faster then them just in case a car comes it won't drive me over.

Showering with my uncle Jarrett <3

Everytime I get new magazines or brochures in the mail I like to open them and smell them. Same with new electronics, I love that new smell.

I sleep in my underpants every single night

I have a feeling that life is a Video Game for another Universe. When the player looks at their computer screen, they see what I see. They control everything I do. Like The Sims games. Everyone else is either other players in a multiplayer server, or they are are all fake, computer players.

Someone asks you "what's up" and you awkwardly reply "good".

Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

Start to cry when your alone, but stop yourself because you don't want to look like a pussy.

Pee in the shower

when i use omegle u usually say im a girl, when a guy says how long is his thing, i say 'mine too' :D

When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

Every time I open a door, I shout out "Alohamora!" and then I open it.

Sometimes I think ''Someone somewhere in the world just got slapped'' or ''Someone just took a nasty shit''.

When I'm alone with my pet, sometimes we just sit down and stare at each each other for a minute or two

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.