Think about past screw ups, then cross my eyes thinking to myself "I'm such a F---ing retard."

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Find something on this site that you actually do not do, and think how weird the person who wrote that must be.

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get bored so I fist myself for money

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Write things on this site, because i cant sleep

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Wait 2-3 seconds with anticipation whenever a baby falls for them to cry.

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did you notice if you travel: when your going to the place feels like 10 hours but when going home feels like 4 hours

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Opening the fridge door, then trying to accomplish pouring a drink, before the door seals itself forever leaving the cola to the mercy of the outside world.

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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When you get in trouble, think of what you could have said or done so you could've gotten away with it.

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when i watch a movie, and a character in it gos underwater, i hold my breath with that person until that person gets above water, then i let go, either that, after the character comes up from the water, i still hold my breath until i cant take it anymore.

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When I'm waiting for someone who is late. I go-over in my head how I'm going to greet them. For example "Well, it's about damn time", or "Finally!".

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Music is ALWAYS playing in my head. I can't go a day without noticing that the whole time a song is just burned in my brain, playing over and over. Is this okay? Im pretty sure im the only one...

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Moving my bottom jaw around slightly makes me feel like I have dog-like ears and I'm moving them around.

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i draw pictures of pokemon on comments (\____/) (??????)

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Mostly make fun of my best friends but never make fun of just regular friends

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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When buying anything - a book, pint of milk, food, pen - will go to put down the first one you picked up to find a newer one.... Then feel really bad for the other one you put down and go back to that one so it doesn't feel hurt.

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feel legitimately bad for Wile E Coyote whenever he does not get the road runner

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Always look down at the floor or avoiding any kind of eye contact when your getting told off for something really bad

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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Fantasize about taking over the world, and killing all religious people.

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When alone at home turn on all the lights before it gets darker.

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Whenever I hear someone say a word in a way that I like, I repeat it.

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I always cry when I pray.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.