When I'm about to go to the bathroom, I think of a million things that I have to do and try to do them all before I pee my pants.

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I can't brush my teeth and rinse in the sink right after I flush the toilet, for fear of it being connected somehow, and rinsing with my own piss.

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suck my own penis

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Eat something to pass the time while I wait for my food in the microwave to be cooked.

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I T-bag my teammates in MW3 when they die.

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When I was little I used to cover myself all the way up and put pillows around me, then ask my sister if she could see me, trying to be invisible when I sleep just in case someone breaks into my house at night.

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When nobody's home I blast the stereo and sing as loud as I can.

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coughing when your having a poo so people know that your on the loo

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I forget I turned the toaster on and jump when it goes off.

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I like to turn the lights off in the bathroom, actually block every little bit of light I possibly can, then take a nice warm shower, curl up on the floor, block my ears and enjoy the warm water and sensory deprivation.

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shag your mom

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Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment

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saying long strings of unconnected words in your head and wondering if you just said something that noone else ever has

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Remembering that you're breathing and then it stops being subconscious so you have to purposely breathe until you stop thinking about it.

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I fake laugh at peoples jokes when they're not funny to avoid akward moments.

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While im showering, I place my hands in a certain position so it looks like I can shoot water out of my fingers.

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When I dry my hair after showering I put a towel on my head and look at the mirror pretending I am a mighty naked sheik.

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When no one's at home, the house turns into an action movie set. Going to my room turns into sprinting up the stairs and purposely stumbling to give the effect that bombs are going off. And always make it to the room in time to hop on the last helicopter out of the jungle.

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try to make myself sneeze because I like the feeling I get when I do

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When I'm watching a video on YouTube, I repeatedly click on the video slider section below the video because I feel uncomfortable not doing it, ever since I realized that you can't move to different parts of the video with your keyboard without clicking there first.

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I freak myself out during class/assembly/family dinners that someone there can read my mind, then just on cue I start thinking about sex and have to change my train of thought before they think I'm strange. Then I go round in a circle (clockwise of course) and scream their names in my head to see if they look so I know who reads minds.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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I sit in a chair upside down and pretend like i'm walking on the ceiling.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.