Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

You try to tell a joke to impress everyone and then you mess it up.

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

Saying an awkward word enough times so that it doesn't sound like a real word anymore

get bored so I fist myself for money

When you're all alone, practice for an interview you're bound to have when you're rich and famous and say other people's responses when they are asked about working with you.

See a news article that looks interesting, too lazy to read the whole thing. Skim.

Try to stop a stopwatch exactly on 1 second with no extra milliseconds

Reach past the first two or three slices of bread to get the better, fresher bread towards the middle.

I often force my mind to think that i'm slowing down time at will just to feel awesome (like when walking down the street i try to make the all cars slow down).

Become self-conscious and wonder if you were making faces while day dreaming during the middle of class.

"????????? ???? ?????! ??? ?? ???????? UH1 HUEY!!! ??? ?? ???????? ??????? ??????????? ?????, ????????? ?? ??????? ? ??????????????? ???????!!! ?????? ????, ???????????????? ?? ???????, ?? ?????? ??????? ?? ????! ???? ???????????? ???????, ????? ??????? ???? ??? ?????????, ? ??????????? ?????, ??? ????????? ??????? ??????????? ?????!!! ? ??? ?? ????? ???? ??????? ??????????? ??????????. ???????? ????????,???? ????, ??? ??????? ?????? ??? ????? ??? ????? ???? ? ??????. "

I like to watch people and imagine different stories that could explain why they're doing whatever it is that their doing.

Really really happy that resisted getting a facebook or twitter account

say to my friend do you ever think that someone else is thinking the same thing that they are thinking at this moment in time and then SHYT in there mouth. Normally they gurggle it in their throat, before swallowing it and making a pedo face, and sometimes i bike naked and shit on cars with diorrea so it explodes on the windows.

forget i left the light on somewhere in the house and when i see it on i think a ghost did it..

Put toilet paper in the toilet before I'm going to take a shit, so that the toilet won't get dirty.

Whenever I watch TV, the volume has to be on multiples of 5. Even if the perfect volume is in between.

Consider selling lots of books, games or DVDs when you have too many to fit perfectly on their shelf.

I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

Pretend to cough in class so other people could pretend to cough

I always have excellent manners when eating around others, but when I'm alone I eat like a pig and have no manners.

Wish that Mexicans would go ruin their own country instead of ruin ours.

If i read or see something good (on tv )the next time i daydream i am always some how involved in it

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.