give speeches in the sower for random awards you will never receive.

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I've had a problem all my life with people thinking I'm a boy, (I'm a girl) so when I first meet someone, my instinct is to find some reason, (however stupid) to say that I'm a girl, (EX: "Can you believe that people actually think I'm a boy?" like when I just meet them).

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put your hands in your bra or pants to keep them warm when you're not in public.

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Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

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Use my phone to see what time it is

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When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

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I tend to ignore phone calls, even when I know the phone call could be important.

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rub your face on your legs after shaving to feel how smooth they are.

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I like to poo while smoking.

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When im out with my dad in the car i swear traffic lights always seem to go to red when were coming

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Watch 30 seconds of a commercial break only to realize it's dvr'd and I could be fast forwarding it.

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You're taking a poo, and you're bored. You use your thighs as drums to pass the time.

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When I am talking about someone, I check my phone to make sure it hasn't dialed them and to make sure they aren't listening.

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I prefer to masturbate by putting a fleshlight under my stuffed-toy smurfette's dress and pretend to smurf her.

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Listening to music---You HAVE to grind you teeth along with the song.

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When in long car rides I imagine a little man running or on roller skates next to the car. When A car comes he turns into a ninja and can slide under/jump over or cut the car in half.

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When leaving a poop smear under the water in the toilet that doesn't get flushed away, I put a few pieces of toilet paper on the water surface to conceal it.

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Try to stop thinking but then just start thinking I'm thinking

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I always wonder if anyone has a crush on me.

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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When I see a post on this site with a single downvote I start to feel guilty and give the person an upvote because I feel sorry for them.

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When alone in a public restroom, after using the toilet I kick the lever and run away out of fear that it will splash on me.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.