When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

When a person tells you: Oh you like Lana Del Rey? Me:No,I like the wall

While listening to music, I take my headphones off to make sure nobody else can hear it.

wonder how old the people r who right these. im 12

I feel like my blanket is an indestructible shield against any monsters that might try to get me at night. If any part of you is out of the covers, you're screwed. lol -ML

I hold in my shit only because i am soo occupied with my current task.

When you are taking a test or anywhere , you remember something funny and you laugh randomly looking like a dumbass then pretend to cough.

I combine every item on my plate in all the possible ways, then i eat the worst part of the meal and save the best part til last.

whenever someone pulls up beside you in another car, you are fully aware of them, but never look at them, your too cool to care what they look like.

Get turned on when you see a girl yawn

If people knew what I am really thinking about while they are talking to me... YIKES!

Wipe a soda can after somebody else in my family drinks out of it just in case I get sick or I may feel there spit.

Naming you're offspring Peter Jankins

When in class , I move alot in my chair when my butt itches .

I pick a green crayon from crayon box but it's one of those yellow-greens that look yellow and now my clover will be half yellow forever.

Turning on the dryers in the bathroom so no one will hear you peeing

Clicking the thumbs up or down when two of the submissions have the same number of thumbs up and think i'm the chosen one.

I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

Accidentally turning the fan on instead of the light when you walk into the bathroom and having a mini-spazz attack because the sound scares you.

When home alone, I put cans in front of the door so if someone breaks in, I wake up.

when you have just ended a argument with someone and you think what else you could of said that would have been better to say

don't wash my hands after using the toilet because its a waste of time

Never step on manholes, because I'm afraid to fall in.

get insulted when lazy people cheer you to work hard

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.