I have a phobia of incest

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look at bins as i walk past them

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Randomly flexing random muscles after long time of sitting at the computer

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When peeing, if I get pee on the seat I will flush the toilet before wiping it and then see if I can quickly wipe it and toss the toilet paper in the toilet before it finishes flushing.

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When I drive I sing really loud and then when a car come up next to me I pretend I wasn't singing

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when im on my phone in bed my phone always falls on my face -.-

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Am I the only one who wrote "free Candy" on the side of my van?

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I piss in the bed every night

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Open blinds when taking a poop to look outside, then realize that someone could be watching you.

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I eat ice creams from the bottom of the cone to the top.

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Contract my gluteus maximus while sitting for a long time to feel more comfortable.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When I go to the bathroom I put toilet paper over my penis and pretend its a ghost

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Wasting a whole bunch of time trying to find how to make one and realizing it was at the top and that you forgot what you were going to put in the first place.

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You laugh to yourself when you think you are alone in a street but then you notice somebody in a car looking at you.

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Instead of having a nasty breaking up, I just disappear.

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When in long car rides I imagine a little man running or on roller skates next to the car. When A car comes he turns into a ninja and can slide under/jump over or cut the car in half.

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wondering if everyone else in the world can read your mind so you avoid thinking about specific things

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cut corners when walking not because it's faster, but because it's more efficient

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When I hear the doorbell ringing and I'm not expecting anyone, I turn off the tv/music and try not to make any sound, so they think there's no one home.

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I very carefully smell what I'm about to eat before I eat it, but I'd most likely eat it, even if I hadn't smelled it first.

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Don't have to poop for a week until I get in the shower

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Become paranoid that this is not the real world, and instead is some coma induced dream.

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popping the lenses out of 3D glasses and wearing them when your doing homework or studying because it makes you feel smarter.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.