It takes half as long to take a dump if I forget my phone.

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When I'm at someone else's house, clutter sort of bothers me and it makes me want to clean up. At my own house, it feels really weird if there's a lack of clutter, so I like to keep it that way.

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Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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Everytime aplane is flying low you think it's going to crash right in front of your eyes

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Thinking epic thoughts like "Man, had a great workout today" just in case someone is reading my mind.

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get so shitfaced you wake up in a closet with piss everywhere

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I sometimes see or think of words and pronounce them differently. ie. Garbage, gar-bah-ge ("ge" like a vibration sound), Target, tar-jhay

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I know it is pointless but still hope to get THUMBS UP

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Eat a biscuit realise how nice it is and eat the whole packet

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Hearing someone singing a song and stopping midway, so you need to finish it.

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I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

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Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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I sometimes feel the desire to grab something fragile and - not out of anger, just because it would be funny - hurl it across the room to watch it explode.

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I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

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I can't step on the cracks of sidewalks.

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When I see that someone else is typing while I'm texting them, I try to quickly finish what I'm typing and send it so that I won't have to change my response.

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Looking outside the window and imagining a huge explosion destroy everything and then u surviving and trying to find a way to survive

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The last meal I have before I get on a plane - I think about how it is food in one city and will be crapped out in another.

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get caught up in youtube comment arguments

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Find that the kettle has recently been used and still contains hot water so decide to have a cup of tea just so that boiling that water wasn't a waste. Think that it might have cooled down by now. Reboil the water.

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Make a weird face when taking a picture with a friend, never see the picture, so you try to remake the face you did in a mirror to see how stupid you looked...

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when i use omegle u usually say im a girl, when a guy says how long is his thing, i say 'mine too' :D

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When I'm alone, I just randomly say "I know you're there so I would look awesome if someone was actually there.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.