after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

I pick at my cuticles when I'm bored.

Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

When I'm cooking, I mumble everything I'm doing under my breath like I'm in a cooking show and I'm talking to the audience.

Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

I think of unbelievably perverted things seconds before I am about to cum when masturbating.

start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

When in a public bathroom and others are in there, pretend to fix your clothes/hair until everyone has left before you use it.

Wish that Mexicans would go fix things in their own country instead of coming here unwelcome and demanding things instead.

Get annoyed when I'm working on something and someone who's looking at funny pictures wants to show me every single one. Then I do the same thing when I'm looking at funny pictures.

I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

Whenever I'm throwing trash down the garbage chute or into a dumpster, I all of the sudden am terrified that I accidentally threw out a valuable ring/my cell phone with the trash.

Always think "what if ghosts really ARE everywhere?" when I'm naked in the shower, or getting dressed, or any other private and/or embarrassing moment. Then get really freaked out and picture 6 people from 1902 watching you.

Say ow when I bang something I'm caring into something, even though I didn't get hurt at all. -B

gh, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a long time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

Create my response for the whole conversation before even having it

Sleep with one leg on top of the covers and the rest of your body under them.

I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

I eat ice creams from the bottom of the cone to the top.

Read something strange and funny that you don't actually do, then say: "whaat?" And lough and everyone around you just look at you not knowing why you're talking to yourself an laughing.

When listening to music via headphones in public, I become paranoid that I am bothering everyone around me as my breathing becomes louder without me realising.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.