Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

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Will use delayed foot-to-ass insults on verbal bullies. You know, the kind that goes off in the persons head days or weeks after they thought they won an argument with me.

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Know you have enough milk in your cereal when you start to see it peek through the cracks

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Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

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Almost every time someone tells me something sad I have to fight the urge to grin.

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When I look at a digital clock, i try to rearrange the number to make them a math equation

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Lay down in bed and get comfortable and then realize you have to pee.

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make mini paper airoplanes in boring lessons and pretend you are flying them

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look at bins as i walk past them

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before i go to sleep i must check the front door knob multiple times to make sure its locked

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when watching a movie in a big screen cinema, i unconsciously look at the bottom of the screen, midway through the movie, expecting to see a time/track/scroll bar. as if it was VLC media player.

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When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

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Somehow can't find anything good to eat after going grocery shopping... even if you buy Oreos

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Being from another country and always thinking in english.

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Reading these, realizing that you don't do some of the things on the top of the list, and wondering if you're weird.

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Pee in the garbage at night when I don't want to wake the whole house up.

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When I'm home alone at night, and the lights are on so you can't see anything out the windows, I will stop randomly and stare out the window to make anyone watching me think I know that they are there.

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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I'll sing nice and loud in the shower and wonder why I haven't come out with an album yet

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When you tell yourself that this is the last page you'll read and end up reading three more.

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Start thinking about how your walking, and then worry that you may lose control of your legs and fall.

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wipe the bottle lid before i drink because i dont whant to taste what the other person had in there mouth...

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Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

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when on a bus, pretend to fail to see your acquaintances to get some rest and avoid boring conversations.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.