after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

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I pick at my cuticles when I'm bored.

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Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

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When I'm cooking, I mumble everything I'm doing under my breath like I'm in a cooking show and I'm talking to the audience.

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Read posts on this website and realize there are a lot of weirdos in the world.

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I think of unbelievably perverted things seconds before I am about to cum when masturbating.

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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When in a public bathroom and others are in there, pretend to fix your clothes/hair until everyone has left before you use it.

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Wish that Mexicans would go fix things in their own country instead of coming here unwelcome and demanding things instead.

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Get annoyed when I'm working on something and someone who's looking at funny pictures wants to show me every single one. Then I do the same thing when I'm looking at funny pictures.

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I use the internet to validate that weirdness is not actually weird at all.

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Whenever I'm throwing trash down the garbage chute or into a dumpster, I all of the sudden am terrified that I accidentally threw out a valuable ring/my cell phone with the trash.

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Always think "what if ghosts really ARE everywhere?" when I'm naked in the shower, or getting dressed, or any other private and/or embarrassing moment. Then get really freaked out and picture 6 people from 1902 watching you.

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Say ow when I bang something I'm caring into something, even though I didn't get hurt at all. -B

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gh, whistle or hum while on the toilet for a long time, just so anyone outside the door doesn't think I'm mastrubating.

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Sometimes if I am by myself at the house or in the car I will act completely insane and absurd. This usually involves me screaming incoherent babble, whole body twitching, making absurd faces and doing this thing where I bite my tongue and shake my head violently. If any normal person saw me they would either think I am having a seizure or currently possessed by Satan.

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Create my response for the whole conversation before even having it

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Sleep with one leg on top of the covers and the rest of your body under them.

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I have shown up for a first date in a friends POS car instead of my own to see if she is too materialistic

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as soon as i put some mint gum in my mouth, i sneeze countless times.

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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I eat ice creams from the bottom of the cone to the top.

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Read something strange and funny that you don't actually do, then say: "whaat?" And lough and everyone around you just look at you not knowing why you're talking to yourself an laughing.

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When listening to music via headphones in public, I become paranoid that I am bothering everyone around me as my breathing becomes louder without me realising.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.