When I loose something , I buy a new one, then continue to find the old one the next day.

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Have troubles sleeping when it's hot.

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Watching movies about couples with age gaps and woundering how it would feel like to be with somebody much older (or younger) than you. Would they use viagra or would you not even try to have sex with someone so old and delicate?

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get under the covers and curl up into a ball to get warm really fast

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Drying yourself after the shower with a towl, wiping your ass dry and beeing scared when you dry other parts of your body you dont use the same part of the towl.

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When no one is home or if no one is looking you go in the fridge and drink right out of the bottle.

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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Right after moving to a new place I check my room for hidden cameras.

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thinking that everybody in the world (except me) has a device which shows them what i am doing, watching and makes them feel what i am feeling

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Secretly think that Flo from the Progressive commercials is bangable.

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When I am surfing the web and i go to another website i see an ad that was about something i just viewed from previous website I wonder if a little man is inside my pc keeping catalog of every website that i visit.

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Get distracted during fap dreams and thinking of your mom and then going OMG GROSS OH GOD IM A PERV!!

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Playing TV in bed because if I don't I jump at every noise in the house and don't sleep.

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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Seperate your food on you dinner plate

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Having small fingers and, regardless, still unable to click on the right thing when on the internet with a touch screen phone.

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when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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When I go to the shops I like to park my car next to a specific coloured car so I can find it afterwards.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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I fill my bathtub up with marinara and then sit curled up in it and pretend that I am a meatball.

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Go to websites like this during school and laugh at the things I read. All around me other students are actually working and looking at me.

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I have one friend I always punch in the shoulder at least once when I see him.

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Whenever I look in the bathroom mirror, I fear that I will see a terrible bloody monster standing behind me. I convince myself of this so completely that I panic and rush out right after I pee.

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refuse to like a post because the number is too perfect and you don't want to screw it up

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.