Pretending to use the force while a door closes behind you, then thinking your brilliant :) -Tim.

When you are speaking to someone with a distinct accent and suddenly take on the accent as your own when responding. - Missy Chemick

get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

try to only take one step on each sidewalk square.

My butthole itches, so I fart to scratch it.

Have deja vu while talking to someone and then stop listening to what they are saying for a few seconds till the feeling passes, then nod like you have been listening the whole time.

When you can't hear your friend, but you nodd your head and snicker, hoping it was a joke

I enjoy my company, I love myself, which is contagious, people around me enjoy my company, and love themselves. Moral: Thumb me down and prove you are a sad fuck TODAY!

wish you looked like either Kellan Lutz or Bradley Cooper! I wish magic existed now.

make mini paper airoplanes in boring lessons and pretend you are flying them

If its dark and you have to go with rhe stairs i do that running because i tink somebody is behind my

Rubbing your scalp and watching your dandruff fall like snowflakes

Hatch an escape plan as soon as my date starts to complain about anything.

At school I go along with the norm even though inside I HATE it!!!!

Assume that on another planet or galaxy there are people just like humans that look exactly like me. Like an alternate universe.

do math problems in my head while having sex to keep from coming

Walk next to someone so you don't look too lonely.

Create the perfect song/poem/philosophical theory/scientific discovery right before you fall asleep and forget it in the morning.

Blow on your ice cream for no apparent reason before you eat it.

When I'm walking in the street and I hear a car coming from behind I try to beat it by running to the closest telephonepole.

I don't thumb down any submissions because then I am just as bad as the people who thumb down mine

Sometimes, I have a hard time looking people I know in the eyes but have no trouble looking strangers in the eyes. I wish I knew why. Help!

Raising your hand in class, and once you're called on, you say, "I forgot."

twirl your penis in a cirlce and make the woo woo sound

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.