When I'm home alone at night, and the lights are on so you can't see anything out the windows, I will stop randomly and stare out the window to make anyone watching me think I know that they are there.

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When i see people even strangers , in my mind i wonder if there virgins or not .

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Try to give my download speed moral support: "You can do it! YES, just stay there!" For anyone out there struggling with slow internet.. I feel your pain

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imagine shooting lasers out from the car and bouncing them of walls and back to the car

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Trying to preform oral on yourself.... And failing.

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im going to kill that person and get away with it

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i want to FAWK the SHYT out of that girl

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when you mouth words (but saying them out loud) when someone can't hear you

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Call the ninja turtles by their full names.

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I never read the terms and conditions but I say I have

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oh snap, i got a boner. hope nobody notices

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When I get a worksheet or a piece of paper with BIG TITLES I immediately shade in all of the gaps in the o's, p's, d's and all other 'hole letters'. And then I start shading in all the words when I finish.

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I make different scenarios for different songs I listen to. I pretend the walls and couches are people. I talk to them.

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I use encryption even for everyday, routine communications because fuck the NSA.

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Pee in the shower

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Poop naked.

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when i use omegle u usually say im a girl, when a guy says how long is his thing, i say 'mine too' :D

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spank it during my commute if I am in traffic

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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I wear my boxers so I can poop through the pee hole

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Not get any thumb ups on a post. Turns out there really are some things only I do...

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When I am doing something that involves using one hand I feel weird because I don't know what to do with my other hand

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Pick out an object ahead of me on the footpath and guess which foot will step closest to it

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When I step on something pokey, I don't say the quick "OW" that is expected, I go the extra syllable and a say "JOW!"

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.