Saying an awkward word enough times so that it doesn't sound like a real word anymore

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When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

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Have a dream about somebody being mean to me. Proceed to be mean to them in real life.

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I like to record the audio from TV shows and movies onto cassette tapes from my stereo, and listen to them on my Walkman while I'm working in the kitchen or around the house.

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I sometimes feel like I am the only one like me in this world

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Have a dream that you can breath under water and wake up and be very disappointed

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Moisturize "down there" after a really drying wipe session.

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Thinking you could bump into someone by the corner of a building (or a wall)

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I like wet humping better than f*cking. but sometimes it slips in anyway, and it's that's pretty enjoyable too. and mt girlfriend is cool with. ... so it's actualy pretty whatevs either way. but wet humping is my jam.

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Whenever I fall over I always seem to think coherently throughout the fall about what can I do to make this less painful

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While making yourself something to eat that takes more than 5 minuets to make. Pretending that you have your own show on a cooking station and talk like your talking to the audience the whole time.

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When I'm riding passenger in a car, things I'm driving past will be a part of my imaginary drum kit. When a car passes in the opposite direction, I'll tap my right foot as the bass drum, a drain hole along the gutter is my left hand snare, and the street signs and lights are the hi-hats in my right hand.

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if something stands for something, i come up with my own version of it.

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Play call of duty then go around shooting everyone in your mind for the rest of the day

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I am Moral Man your friendly r*pist neighboorhood, what only I can do? I can steal, cheat, kill r*pe boys and girls, cats, not mouse heck I am no pervert either see? All this and I can still be... ...A SMOOTH CRIMINAL! AH! YAHOOW!

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wait up to 14 days just to find the opportunity to use one, really good, joke.

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Back away as much as I can from airplane toilets before flushing them because the noise scares me

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think about what im gonna say abillon times in my head before i say it -jesse

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close one eye or the other to move an object near by when I'm bored -Noel

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When playing Sims, i spend more time building my house, than playing the game itself.

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I make a mental note NOT to buy the product or service if I feel they are trying to brainwash me with their ads.

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When I use the bathroom at school, I keep the door open with the kickstand and use the stall. It's because I fear that one day, when I'm all alone in the bathroom with the door closed, the fire alarm will go off and scare the living crap out of me. This trick backfires when someone comes in without closing the door and uses the urinal.

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Walk next to someone so you don't look too lonely.

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Check the shower before you pee to make sure nothing is waiting there to literally get you with your pants down.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.