Sometimes I look at people and think, "They poop."

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When in bed, I fold a small section of the covers in my hand to make a point and poke my fingers with it.

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When people are whispering you think they are saying bad things

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When I'm cooking, I mumble everything I'm doing under my breath like I'm in a cooking show and I'm talking to the audience.

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After going to the bathroom, flush the toilet than hurry out of the bathroom and walk fast past a certain line going across the floor or make an imaginary line on the floor before the toilet fully flushes.

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Pick out an object ahead of me on the footpath and guess which foot will step closest to it

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Have to catch my significant other when they lie, not because I really care but to prove I'm smarter

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I often think I have the greastest taste in everything

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When I'm walking on the sidewalk, I try to count and keep a steady rate of how many times I step on each slab of concrete.

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Living in the shadow of an atheletic friend, and secretly wanting to beat them up just to prove that you're as good as they are.

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you look at someone and they look toward you and you look away quickly then you look back to see if they are still looking.

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arrange certain social situations with attractive girls just to make spank bank deposits.

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try as hard as possible to not use the last of the toilet paper so you don't have to change the roll and inadvertently force someone else to do it.

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every single time a sad song comes on your ipod you imagine yourself in a movie, gloomily looking out a window or sitting alone on a bench.

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Try to make a sound described in a book or text (like a gasp or a gargle)

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I don't cut a conversation on the phone short just because I have to use the "facilities". I've mastered the art of being as far away from the toilet while flushing and sprinting out of the bathroom.

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Give vocal commentary on the song I just played when I'm the only one in the car.

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Even if it's something as innocent as a simple google search, I'm still inexplicably terrified when my parents draw near and could potentially see it. I silently flip out and frantically hide it like it's porn or something. ..And I don't even look at porn :I

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I make a conversation with myself when looking at mirrors !

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worry about your eyebrows sneaking their way up and making wrinkles on your forehead

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Buy something and try to save it for an event of some kind and end up failing to do so, every darn time too.

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I wonder sometimes if I've ever met my future self.

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Check an insane amount of times to see if the door is locked, then finally get back to jerking off.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.