do a fake cough when my shit is falling in the toilet

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When writing out something in the air, you mess up so you "wipe" out the mistake and then move to another piece of air because it's "cleaner".

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Lick my cell phone screen to clean it.

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Eat or drink something tpretending it's some sort of fuel that'll give you powers.

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When I am bored, I imagine saving my crush' s life and we live happily ever after. :( what an idiot I am

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When taking a shower, and standing in the opposite direction where the water is coming fromY

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Take a side of bacon and jack off watching Babe.

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When in the shower, try to cross your arms and keep them as high up to your head as you can. Fill them with water and drink from it.

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I turn on the faucet or turn up the radio in the bathroom so maybe no one can hear me pee.

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Change my name on Siri on iPhone to something hillarius and make it say my name

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Have a fantasy where Jesus Christ is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole with a lawn dart while Garth Brooks gives birth to something resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum.

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when im in a public toilet and my freinds outside i make loud converstation with them so they cant hear me pee.

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See a persons name a place a word or thing in a book computer magazine etc... and right after hearing the same thing on tv or the radio. Vice versa

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Whenever I walk through automatic doors I say "Thank You"

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Pick scabs and eat them.. and when i start bleeding suck the blood up with my mouth...

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I have to check my closet for monsters so they don't get me while I sleep

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When i'm eating small, colored foods like skittles or gummies, i have to have one on each side of my mouth so one side doesn't feel happier than the other and they have to be different colors.

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I have one of those automatic shower cleaners. After I press the button, it beeps 15 times before starting. I have to get out my brush, get out the hair dryer, plug it in, and Turin it on before the 15th beep. Every time.

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After having an argument with your partner you text them later then halfway thru the text you forget hat you were going to say back track and tell them you love them! "didn't matter really did it lol"

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Saying "ouch!" when someone throws something and it hits an inanimate object.. -Sarah

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"I'll start tomorrow..." wake up and it has been a year later and I still haven't done it.

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When listening to awesome music I perform a subtle headbanging motion.. Then I look around to see if anybody is staring at me like I'm retarded.

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Repeatably look at something ugly, even if it's ugly

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That microscopic flying things that follows my eyes' motion, especially when i look up in the sky.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.