Pretend that when you are in the shower, the shower head is a giant machine gun, that takes thousands of men to operate, and that you were an extremely large person and you catch ALL of the bullets in your mouth, spitting them at the shower head while at the same time turning off the water as if they all died, and the small drips that continue to drop out were the dead soldires' blood.....-dillon

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When I'm home alone, I pretend I'm famous, and pretend I'm doing a television or magazine interview, and answer out loud to questions I ask in my head

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When I first start dating or seeing someone I write down options for conversation starters before I phone them in case it goes silent.

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Sometimes when I touch something I have to touch all of the object and with both hands, otherwise I feel incomplete.

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I lock the bathroom door even when I'm home alone.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Live in a house my whole life and still not know what switch does which

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feel legitimately bad for Wile E Coyote whenever he does not get the road runner

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I have to fart real bad but people are around me , so I try to silent fart

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tries to beat the search from loading the results before Im done typing my search when using youtube for xbox 360

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When I am driving, I hate everyone else who is driving.

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When eating chips/cereal (out of the box)/any small snacks I put an even amount in my mouth and divide them evenly on each side of my mouth and chew them like that.

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Yelling my cats name in my mind to see if i can get him to look at me using the power of my mind

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when you can't think of anything to type you just type random letters. a;lsdfj;ldfkjsfasdfljf

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grab my cats tongue when he is licking my hand

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I translate (parts of) songs into different languages in my head. I try to do it as good as possible.

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Clenching my fists, imagining I have wolverine claws coming out of my knuckles

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when i was a kid, i lookup dirty words in the english dictionary as substitute for porn :(

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I put salt on buttered toast...

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When I'm in the shower and I hear a noise I automatically think someone broke into my house and killed my family and that they're coming for me and I will have to fight off the killer naked.

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I stick one foot out of my blanket so I'm not hot or cold.

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Whenever I slurp from a straw I do it a little bit at a time, slowly and steadily so people don't turn at me and give me an annoyed face.

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Get exstremly sad or depressed whenever you think about something you did that was embarrassing or something you regret infront of someone when that person probably doesn't even remember it....

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when you bleed you suck your own blood

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.