Repeat the phrase "you too" after a comment someone makes that does not apply. Bob: happy birthday Jim Jim: you too bob. Awwww sh!t.

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If I'm in my room and I need to fart, I walk into someone else's room and fart in there so that my room doesn't stink up.

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think your hitting your leg on a chair or desk, really someones foot

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I stare at the paint impasto on the ceiling until I see faces.

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Closed the door to the refrigerator super slow, just to watch the light turn off.

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pinch the tip of my dick when I masturbate.

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When eating skittles and share it with my friends, i gave them the flavors that i dont really like.

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When I masturbate I trade hands often in fear that my penis may become crooked.

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Change my music to something cooler than the song im listening to when i pass by other kids my age

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Drying yourself after the shower with a towl, wiping your ass dry and beeing scared when you dry other parts of your body you dont use the same part of the towl.

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Turn on Fox News and wonder if I'm watching a bad comedy routine or news reporting.

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when baking cookies I eat waaayyy too much of the dough, to the point that I don't even want any of the cookies when I am finished baking them.

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Buying a new song, listening to it on repeat for hours until it gets old, and then never listening to it again.

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Act like your on a cooking tv show when your cooking

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Imagine that other people see colors different from me and if i had their brain i would see it like them

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Consider selling lots of books, games or DVDs when you have too many to fit perfectly on their shelf.

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"Oh, that was a messed up thought, probably shouldn't think about it again or something worse because---GODDAMN IT."

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I stare at people to see if they have a innie or outtie belly button

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sometimes if I am going on a flight to another country I will hold a small pocket of air in my mouth before getting on the plane and then I would let it out after we land

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On true/false sections of tests, I get paranoid if there are not the same amount of trues and falses.

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When I pee if there is already some toilet paper there I try to sink it with my pee.

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I invented this game in the bathroom called "start peeing before the light fully lightens up".Its kind of a challenge because if i actually succeed i might not pee in the right place.

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Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I never did certain things like move to a new house or attended a certain school or college. I wonder if I still would have met the people who are in my life now. I think about If I never met my best friends, people who are like family to me. Then I get really sad because it's something I never want to imagine. Afterwards, I talk to them to cheer myself up.

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Sometimes I wonder who created words. For instance, who thought to call a fence a fence? It could have been called something completely random like bucxbuw, but it would seem normal to us and fence would seem like jibberish instead.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.