Poking your eye to see the black circle at the corner of your eye

thumb_up thumb_down -131

Pour cereal. Realize there is no milk. You really want cereal so you try it with water. Realize that was a bad idea.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

if i put my shirt on backwards, instead of taking my shirt off and putting it on right, i pull my arms in and just spin my shirt.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

When I pee if there is already some toilet paper there I try to sink it with my pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

give speeches in the sower for random awards you will never receive.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

when on a bus, pretend to fail to see your acquaintances to get some rest and avoid boring conversations.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

When you can't be bothered to go to the toilet so you stay watching tv or going on your laptop while trying to hold it in.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

When In the car, use th bug guts to ramp up all of the culverts and when you don't have a landing for a while, pretend that you got a speed bonus and are soaring with some amazing air.-dillon

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I can't help spitting into the toilet when I piss, let it drop out my mouth and hit the water to see if I can get it in the center.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I like to have a picture of my crush on my computer screen, and will walk around a room while he 'looks at me'.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

when I take a big dump I turn around to see how big it is

thumb_up thumb_down -28

lie on the couch with my head upside-down and imagine what it'd be like to walk around on the ceiling, and if you were to flip the house over so the floor's the ceiling, what you'd have to nail down to keep in place.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

fart

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Imagining a friend can see everything you do during the day through telepathy.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Shit in the shower and pushing it down the drain with your feet

thumb_up thumb_down -145

While I am busy working I like to have music playing and while I type I type to the song and its beat

thumb_up thumb_down -22

If there's a mirror i look if there's people around looking at me, and if there aren't it's ok to stare at my reflection.

thumb_up thumb_down -100

Sometimes I become paranoid that the ceiling is going to randomly come crashing down and kill me.

thumb_up thumb_down -100

When I'm riding in a car, i squeeze my toes everytime the car passes a dotted line in the road or when theres a curb

thumb_up thumb_down +71

Take a dump in the dark... Anyone but me?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

you spread your cheeks apart when you sit on the the tolet so that your poop does not touch your cheaks

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I poop on the side of my house in the morning so I do not have to make noise then come back in.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Date your English paper so it looks like you did it earlier (rather than saving it for the last minute).

thumb_up thumb_down -113

Praying to God even though you tell people you're an Atheist.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.