I always leave a little coffee in the pot so that it becomes someone elses problem

give speeches in the sower for random awards you will never receive.

When I'm stressed, I pick at the skin on my head and pull white flakes out of my hair. There's nothing more satisfying to me than that.

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lie on the couch with my head upside-down and imagine what it'd be like to walk around on the ceiling, and if you were to flip the house over so the floor's the ceiling, what you'd have to nail down to keep in place.

I hug-squeeze the bread to get all the air out before putting it away.

When in a room with a bunch of people, see the one person who's extremely cute and then get a random boner and think "GO AWAY GO AWAY GO AWAY"

fart

while taking a bath, I imagine my knees, belly, arms etc poking out of the water are islands, and i imagine little people running around on them

In the car and sad song comes on you look out the window and pretend your in a movie.

If there's a mirror i look if there's people around looking at me, and if there aren't it's ok to stare at my reflection.

Think about blinking, and then realize that when you think about blinking, you can't stop thinking about blinking, and thus a 3-4 minute awkward blinking-fest begins.

While I am busy working I like to have music playing and while I type I type to the song and its beat

Thinking about what you want to dream about while brushing your teeth at night.

Pour cereal. Realize there is no milk. You really want cereal so you try it with water. Realize that was a bad idea.

For the long meaningless comments below: I choose to decide to thumb the comments down and see them gone forever! Moral: Thats right, I spend less time on the webs, but here I am.

I'm 30, but to this day I still have fantasies about rescuing the girl that I'm secretly in love with from a dangerous situation. The fantasies get increasingly ridiculous, sometimes they even involve superhero stuff. It's as if my own mind was trying to let me know that I should grow the f*** up.

While lying in the tub the water gets cold so u turn back on the hot water with ur feet bc u are too lazy to get up and turn it on with your hands

when someone is playing a song which i really like but don't know the name of it i either try to guess the name by the lyrics or i try to read the name from their iPod without them noticing and then immediately make a note on my mobile and saving it.

close left eye, then right eye to see how things move....

Looking at these in school when it's dead silent and trying so hard not to laugh so you won't get yelled at.

Date your English paper so it looks like you did it earlier (rather than saving it for the last minute).

Feel like you sing wonderfully when you are alone, but feel like you sing horribly in front of others.

if i put my shirt on backwards, instead of taking my shirt off and putting it on right, i pull my arms in and just spin my shirt.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.