When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

Wondering how your funeral would play out if you die

When I'm walking I look up at nothing in particular and it causes everyone else to look up too!

Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

Make calculations with house number. Eg: House nº 112 means house nº 4

Watched the woman in black then go to bed then suddenly a woman in black comes in my room oh wait it is just my mum saying good night

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

I ship Bolin and Korra as a romance and a bromance. Am I weird for doing this?

I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

Thinking your life is a movie...

When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

I get mad at women because they menstruate and that's gross. I don't judge one woman individually for it, but I'm disgusted with the whole gender, which leads to being almost disgusted with myself for being attracted to them.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.