Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

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When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

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Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

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When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

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i masturbate with my feet

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watch reality t.v. when you're feeling guilty and think to yourself "at least I'm not as bad as that"

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You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

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I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

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that movie-like moment when you want to rush out to dance in the rain

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if im somewhere and say i get a itchy ass,i would say to a friend whilst sctatching " i have the itchyist but whole in the world right now" jokingly. but then think to myself, i wonder if there is someone in the world right now at the same time as me who has actually got a itchyer butt lol

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I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

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While at the movies, grab and eat your popcorn with your tongue and pretend you are a lizard.

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Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

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I sometimes watch entire movies with the sound off and a good album playing.

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

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Have a big twitch, freak out when you are dosing off in class but suddenly wake up.

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Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

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thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.