After watching a really good film that has a narrator, everything I do is narrated by that person in my head.

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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Smoking in the shower.

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fap

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I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

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I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

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Being fat

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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

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Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

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I was not born in the country I am living in now

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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I was the real Stig...

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Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

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Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

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When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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Hate people who don't dress like you because they're not fashionable. Hate people who do dress like you because they threaten your individuality.

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

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When I'm on a site that requires you to login with Facebook or Twitter to leave a comment, I click on the names of the nice looking ones to go see their pages to add them to my friends list.

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Hate when I can't sleep and the sun starts to come up and I hear birds chirping and i get worried and just realize that I should be happy that it's a new day and to relax.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.