judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

Smoking in the shower.

I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

fap

Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

I ship Bolin and Korra as a romance and a bromance. Am I weird for doing this?

Hide your I pod when your parents walk in at 12pm and then go back to what ever you were doing when they leave.

I twerk in the mirror to see how much my ass jiggles

Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

When dunking oreos I like to hold it under the milk and watch the bubbles til they stop

If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

When you are almost crying while laughing in a silent area, you have to think terrible thoughts just to get rid of the laughing.

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

Pretend to listen to music, but just do it so nobody talks to me or i simply just ignore them.

Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.