Change the channel when a Progressive commercial comes on because I can't STAND that stupid Flo girl.

When im standing at a urinal and another guy was there before me and i still finish first i pretend like im still peeing so he wont think i have a bladder problem.

Sometimes I find myself staring at the television only to realize its off.

When I Was Little I Always Slept On My Stomach Even If I Wasn't Comfortable Because I Thought It Would Be Harder For Aliens To Abduct Me.

Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

Think your teacher is super hot and have a hard time concentrating in class . . . for the whole year.

Think about when im old and im dying and under what circumstances,and think will i remember this day when i thought of it and think,shit that was fast,almost like sending myself a message to the future...if that makes any sense lol

Writing/ Typing "wemon" to represent more than 1 women, but then realizing that it's not actually a word...

think that your whole life is just a dream and that you're going to wake up someday

Go on this site to feel normal.

Go up/down the stairs in 10 steps exactly. Talk to an imaginary girlfriend when I'm guilty of something, and she helps me out and holds me till I fall asleep.

Sometimes I worry that my life is just someones dream and that I'm not real.

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

Before I go to bed I have to put one of my hands between my knees in order to warm up and get comfy.

Put my finger over one pixel of my digital alarm clock, because I know that's the only one that will change in the next minute. Take it off. MAGIC.

In britain,everytime i see a magpie i got to do this silly ritual and salute and say good morning mr magpie (depending on wat time of day it is) and make sure 2 ppl see it at the same time or something bad will happen.then someone will tell me another one i should do and i add it on! Its never ending.

Pretending not to hear someone talk to you hoping they wont care enough to repeat themselves so you wont have to talk to them

I sit on the toilet and pretend to tell someone about how awesome my life is when it isn't.

I bought a ps4 and really regret it.

pull out a flies wings and let it go

putting your hand in the water in the back of the toilet and thinking its gross toilet water and get grossed out

When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> <

Getting secretly pissed off when people don't like your birthday post on their Facebook wall.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.