in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

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Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

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fap

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Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

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Only use the left earphone.

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Being fat

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Sitting down in the shower

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Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

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Scratch inside my ear, then lick the finger I used.

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

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I have autofocus in my eyes.

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send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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I **** with no hands.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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I really hate the sound of sqeaking balloons

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Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.