When ever i watch a movie with my parents i hope to god there is no nudity or awkward sex talk

Until just recently, I thought apple juice was made by the pee of the company. Just that they added sugar.

Cannot even read a word when a blonde lady sits in front of me in a library.

Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

You feel compelled to stab someone in the face... But you don't since you know its wrong. Instead you play violent video games to get it off your mind.

When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

Link gross things with porn i.e: Think of really gross things (or friends or family) when fapping to really hot stuff ( the porn becomes ruined)

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

Have one of those days where you think it is just a dream but then reality takes over

After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen

when im in the toilet and invent something in my mind and dont have a pen and paper to wright my invention and when im done i forget about it...

Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

Thinking about life as if its just a dream and wondeing if one day your just going to wake up and be like " wtf just happend".....

Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

sometimes *sigh* sometimes I-I-I-I feel like the third or fourth most useless invention! Moral: BUAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.