Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

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Counting down on a digital clock, trying to say "0" just as the time changes.

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Thinking something embarrassing, then having to talk to someone and suddenly getting worried you are about to blurt out your thoughts

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eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

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I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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Paranoid someone is reading your mind, so you think something weird to see if they look at you

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(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

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Something that bothers me is when a movie sequel comes out and for whatever reason the same things from the first movie happens so they just end up making the same movie

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Ur mum

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Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

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whenever I use a public stall I pretend Im not there to avoid unwanted attention

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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fap

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Pretend like i'm having a conversation with someone talking to somebody on a phone, and randomly say something to go with what the person says.

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Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

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Pick your butt and then wipe your hand/fingers somewhere hoping that the smell dosn't stick to you and that no one smells it....

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Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

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everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

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Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.