- Things You Think Only You Do

Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm actually in a coma and that everything is just a dream and my parents are standing over me watching me and wishing their daughter was awake

carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

Pretend you and your classmates are in a Hunger Games scenario.

Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

I rehearse arguments in my head.

Being stuck in a traffic jam and wishing I could just apparate

Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GLENDA!!!

When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

I prefer to go to the bathroom with the door open.

Tap my fingers really rapidly when I'm annoyed, stressed out, fed up or angry.

When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

I **** with no hands.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.