Believing in the kindness of strangers

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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I rehearse arguments in my head.

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Having to poop in a certain way to avoid your ass sucking it in again. If it all comes out in one go, the cleaning becomes a lot easier and more satisfying.

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When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

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Scratch inside my ear, then lick the finger I used.

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Thinking about a situation someone else in the world might be in. For example, Someone dying and the pain they must be going through.

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Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

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Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.

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I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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read on youtube comments with too unlikes

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I am such a coward. When I'm going to have an argument or complain to someone, I think of the beat ever retort, but when it comes down to it I say "why are you so mean" or " why don't you just leave me alone for once" or something like that. ( Yes I get picked on, cos I'm the smartest in our class)

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stare at someone then when they turn around look all around the room pretending you weren't looking at them

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

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If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

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Write something down here so that it seems like you think its normal when your actually really paranoid that its not.

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Tells a joke only you thought was funny and still laughs then laughs harder because your the only one laughing nikki

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Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

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Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

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feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.