Try to move your head to line up specks on the windshield with objects outside.

Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

While playing a video game, narrate it explicitly in your head, e.i., stringing together absurd amounts of obscenities and scream them telepathically at your foes.

Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

Use the toilet shower to wipe your a**, but denies the fact until death for your friends.

I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

Try to think of something nice when then thinks I the scariest things

i get an headache when i each cheese. but i don't get one when i have pizza or cheese and onion crisps

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

I love the tingly feeling you get when youve shifted after realizing you arm, leg, hand, etc. has gone numb. am i the only one?

Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

send a text to some one and act like you "meant" to send it to someone else.

I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.