Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

After going to the toilet to do a S#!* I will only sit on one cheek for the rest of the day until I bathe

Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

Analyzing what could be wrong or false about your religion and God, then shooing the thoughts away in fear you won't get into Heaven.

sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

Think that the person driving keeps staring at me when ever they look in the mirror and I'm sat in the back.

Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.

That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

Complimenting a girl awkwardly,and then smiling stupidly later and thinking of alternate versions of the conversation that happened!!

Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.