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Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.
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+32
When reading some of the weirder things here, I somewhat worry some of these things people do might start happening to me just because I read about them.
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+32
accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep
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+22
dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!
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+22
Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?
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+20
Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.
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+18
When your to lazy try to use the force to pick things up
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+18
Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.
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+16
Air guitar to a song of how you think it would be on a Guitar Hero game.
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+12
Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.
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+12
I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man
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+12
When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.
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+10
Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.
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+10
Sitting on a toilet in a public bathroom and staying silent until everyone leaves, so you do not feel the embarrassment
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+10
Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.
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+8
Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."
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+8
When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)
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+6
I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?
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+6
Stab myself on a daily basis
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+6
Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.
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+6
I chew my ice cream.
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+4
When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.
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+2
When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.
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+2
Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.