Get scared of the dark while in bed, so you make sure all limbs are tucked nice and tight under the covers. Once done, you now feel safe..

I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

Getting over excited when you hear a song you like on the radio, even though you have it on your Ipod and can listen to it whenever you want.

Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

I scratch and sniff.

Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

I mean Diana Ross.

Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp

turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

I take a dump and then look to see how big it is.

When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.

Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

Wonder what random strangers look like or noises and such they make while having sex. Everyone literally. People you interact with at work , customers, your boss, the married couple. Except for people who are like dirty looking af. Our just straight up ugly. Then your like grossed out by those thoughts your having and start getting that home sickfeeling in your stomach. Almost like butterflies but like dead ones or something. Hard to explain.

Rub a pen tip between my fingers.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.