While in the shower, after ive used soap and stuff i turn the water to cold and i pretend im on fear factor and close my eyes so i cannot see what i am trying to get while crawling through freezing cold water

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Anytime I walk in anyplace with cracks in the ground (tiled floors, cement squares, etc.) I do my best to avoid stepping on cracks in fear of something happening if I do.

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I wonder if sport games are rigged?

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When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

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When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

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browse the internet at school and look at shit brix and the dog with the jesus butthole appears and the teacher saw and said what are you looking at? i was banned for the rest of the term. jesse footter

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log out of any social network sites so that when im on a website it doesnt somehow send messages to my profile

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hover over public toilets and end up leaving a sprinkling of pee that lands uniformly all over on the seat then use a big wad of TP and my foot to wipe down the seat.

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I never take drinks into smelly places, out of fear that the smell will somehow get into my drink and contaminate the taste.

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Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

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Be best friends with someone and tell them all your secrets and then they become best friends with someone else and you hope they won't tell your secrets

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When the good guy in a movie is in a bad situation, I imagine myself doing something different that seems more legit.

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I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

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I don't care about who a celebrity dates or marries. Why should I?

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Pretend to listen to music, but just do it so nobody talks to me or i simply just ignore them.

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When it's as quiet as possible in the classroom in the middle of the period and everyone is silently doing their work.... I suddenly think of something REALLY funny and spend the next half hour awkwardly grinning trying my hardest not to burst out uncontrollably.

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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Drink out the carton (your whole family prob does it)

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right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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When I'm in the car I imagine I'm Superman flying along next to the car, whipping under, over and around traffic signs, trees, and fences. Sometimes I then fly up above the traffic a little. Then I get worried I will cause a traffic accident because people will be watching me instead of the road. I've done this since I was a kid. I'm 45 now and I still do it! Sometimes I'm Spider-Man, swing and jumping from truck to truck, car to car to keep moving fast along the highway. And lately, sometimes I do the Superman flying thing, but as Iron Man.

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Sometimes I toot.

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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taking your t shirt or sweatshirt off quickly so nothing gets you while its over your face

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.