carry my cat by holding it's front and back legs

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I Masturbate Daily.

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Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

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I say a word and it feels like it didnt roll off of my tongue right, so I keep mouthing the word and saying it quietly to myself or in my head. Then end up saying it loudly in affirmation, possibly more than once.

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When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

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use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

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Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

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i masturbate with my feet

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Write angry notes into your search browser in case any Russian spies are watching.

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I waTch 2 GIRLS AND 1 CUP AND I FAPPED THOSE BITCHES MANY TIMES! HELL YEA! /M\

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Believing in the kindness of strangers

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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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Scratch inside my ear, then lick the finger I used.

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try to give your friends spirit animals

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I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

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Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

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sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

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When I am bored I look at things and wonder about the people who made them, and at what time they were made, etc. Like whether my Bic pen was made in the morning or the night. Savy.

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Tap my fingers really rapidly when I'm annoyed, stressed out, fed up or angry.

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I can't piss with my shoes on.

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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When I was little I used to cover myself all the way up and put pillows around me, then ask my sister if she could see me, trying to be invisible when I sleep just in case someone breaks into my house at night.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.