Stop at the beginning of an escalator, and let the stairs drag you forward by just your toes.

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When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

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If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

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I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

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Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

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(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

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Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

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I strum my fingers on my other hand between the fingers on the other hand which is a fist to make a popping sound (Try it, it's really fun)

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Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

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Sleeping with one leg under the blanket and one out.

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At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a hardon and make people think it's that big all time.

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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everytime i see a jet stream in the air i pretend that i can shoot a missile with my finger tip that is self guided and tracks down the airplane that made that certain jet stream.

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Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

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I think something is gonna get me at night when I walk out of my brothers roomso I look behind me and run and usually bump into a wall

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getting really nervous about random white vans that drive by you.

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Somethings thinking: O God, I love this world.

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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I love to garden and I love flowers. I refuse to have a window box because I don't want those creepy Sesame Street twiddlebugs to live that close to my house.

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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Sitting down in the shower

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.