When you're in a public place, make up conversations between strangers. Example: Man to wife: Let's get out of here. There's no place to sit. Wife to man: Honey, we just got here. Man to wife: Maybe you didn't understand, Martha. There's no place to sit.

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I probably am the only one who does this but I climb on my cat's cat tree to see what it's like to be a cat o.o

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acting as if you can shoot with a banana

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Tell myself that I'm only going for a 20 minute nap and end up sleeping for 1/+ hour(s)...

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I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

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I make sims of everyone I know and make them have kids together.

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Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

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When I'm sitting on the toilet, I try to make piss and crap come out at the same time.

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Add numbers on license plates of cars around me while waiting at a light.

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Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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Look in the fridge 10 times without eating anything

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Realizing that I can just yell out the word "Fuck!" and no one can stop me.

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I often try to visualise and merge my faces with various girls i could potentially fall for, just to assess how our future children would look like.

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

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Sometimes I think my shit smells delicious... and I cant believe I am actually not only typing it here, but "finally" admitting it to myself.

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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I hid money in a jar behind a brick in the house I lived in and forgot about it. I've since moved to another state but I didn't remember I left the cash behind until years later.

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When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

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Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

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Courtesy flush.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.