Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

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When I'm drinking something, I slosh the glass back and forth a long with my head to try and get what I'm drinking into my mouth.

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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Smoking in the shower.

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eat cake in a bowl with milk the way you would eat a bowl of cereal

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Skip the first 3 minutes of "Free Bird" because it's too slow.

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walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

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I get really annoyed by the constant audience laughter in some tv shows even when nothing funny is said

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try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

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Drum on the chair between your legs and wonder if people think that you're playing with yourself.

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not eating the ends of a hotdog.

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If I'm in the car looking for an address or a street name I'll turn down the radio. Why?

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Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

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use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

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Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

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when you pick up something you think is going to be heavy and its like you suddenly have super strength

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Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

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Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

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When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

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Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

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I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.