Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

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trying to piss after masturbation hurts.

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I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

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Whenever I finish reading a book, I feel a great sense of achievement.

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poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

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When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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i masturbate with my feet

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Thinking about a situation someone else in the world might be in. For example, Someone dying and the pain they must be going through.

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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When I'm watching something interesting on TV, sometimes i realize they I'm making a weird face so i make sure that i make my face go back to its normal position. This way, my face won't get stuck like that

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I think my friends are dumb! I love them so much!!

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Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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I gotta get down of Friday

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When someone enters the room while i'm playing a game, start playing the best song of the game soundtrack so they notice it and think the game has a cool soundtrack.

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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see if I can hold my breath when walking down a long hallway

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When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

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when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

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If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.