listen to madonnas new album

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Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

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Stand on the first floor and look up through the 2nd story railing just to look up women's skirts.

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Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

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Sometimes when I look in the mirror I act out a scene like Tyra banks coming up to me and asking me to be on America's next top model.

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Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

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Go outside to meet a friend but he cancelled so you stay in your garage so your parents don't know you're there

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Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

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Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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i masturbate with my feet

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

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When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

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Slowly close the fridge door to see when the light bulb turns off.

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Walk down the street, listening to a song, singing it softly, then thinking 'I might wanna stop doing that before I look awkward', but the wires get crossed and you start singing LOUDER and so on.

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Imagine a little person trapped and about to be crushed in the progress bar.

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Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

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Make up a song to yourself.

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Walking into a room to do something, and then forgetting what you were gonna do.

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When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.