Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

thumb_up thumb_down -63

When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

thumb_up thumb_down -71

Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.

thumb_up thumb_down -89

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

thumb_up thumb_down -89

Make up a song to yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -157

If someone high fives me on one hand, I need to high five the other one too, or I feel uneven.

thumb_up thumb_down +88

When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Think that the person driving keeps staring at me when ever they look in the mirror and I'm sat in the back.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Do a little half laugh, then when someone looks at you, you realise that it wasn't even funny so you pretend to be clearing your throat.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

it is not disgusting to bite your toe nails, it is a skill

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Mayada stupid

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

When I am bored and home alone, I sometimes try to recreate the most annoying sound in the world from Dumb and Dumber. (P.S. Sorry if this was already submitted, I didn't see it.)

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Say something smart in class, then worry your friends will rip ony uo for it half way through saying it, so end it by saying "or something like that."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.