I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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You tell your friends that you hate the Rick roll'd song even though you secretly like it.

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I keep on trying to imagine how long eternity is for when I go to Heaven. It never ends...

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use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

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Put the porn sound in a really low volume even when you have headphones, just to make sure noone can hear it. Then take off the headphones once in a while to check if it sounds too loud.

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Use the letters on my phone to make words to help me remember important numbers

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Sitting down in the shower

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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

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I HATE minecraft gift codes and the morons who post about them. I wish those morons would get off my planet.

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When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

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start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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Go to bed at 9 am and then regret whole day is wasted

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Kill Jb without getting aressted.

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If i've been thinking about a particular person a lot, afterwards if people are telling a story or describing a scenario, I always picture the person I was thinking of before as the person as the main character in their story/scenario.

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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I sometimes look at a guy and wonder how big their dick is.

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Laying alone in bed at night and then every single scary thought, face, image, movie, or whatever starts playing in your mind.

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When i was a kid. I really dont care about the story of any animated film. As long as im watching it.

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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I wonder if sport games are rigged?

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Doing something, and someone asks you what you're doing, and you realize you can't remember. Then they walk off and the instant they're gone, you remember.

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thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

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Try stick to something but fail in the end

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.