- Things You Think Only You Do

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

whenever someone pulls up beside you in another car, you are fully aware of them, but never look at them, your too cool to care what they look like.

walking up steps in the dark and you think you've gotten to the top but there's actually one more step and you panic because you think your going to fall

try and open the microwave right before it finishes.

Burglars have become very clever. Just last night my wife turned to me and said that she hears burglars downstairs so I got up quietly checked every room suddenly I realised that I don't have a wife.

Think what would I be doing if I was someone else

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

Stopping the microwave at 1 second because it's late and you don't want to be loud.

When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

Write a word then wonder if it's spelt with an i or and e so just put them both in but do it in such a way that the person reading it won't know whether you didn't know the spelling or misspelled it then realized your mistake and tried to fix it.

When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

What do you call a rapist in your house? Your father.

Tap my fingers really rapidly when I'm annoyed, stressed out, fed up or angry.

Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

Love to check my astrological compatibility with my favorite musicians.

I **** with no hands.

Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

When you like your own comment or status', but then you feel kind of pathetic for doing it so you unlike it.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.