trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

I imagine myself having a superpower that could make people see from my point of view. I would just have to lay a hand on them, and suddenly they would understand who I really am.

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

Start walking down a busy street or mall, and realise I've gone the wrong way. Suddenly stop and pretend to read something on my phone for a few seconds before turning round and walking the right way.

I prefer to go to the bathroom with the door open.

I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

I was not born in the country I am living in now

Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

click your pen off of your desk and make it hop in the air

(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

I thought I was disgusting until I read the top voted things here. Floral: Actually pretty neat.

I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

When you're walking along at night and you see the moon, then you move around quickly,still looking at it as if you're controlling it.

Run faster down hotel corridors.

Go for a 10 mile run.

Become self-conscious and wonder if you were making faces while day dreaming during the middle of class.

Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

Being able to think about great ideas for the world, but not being able to get a math problem done.

Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.