Going to sleep during class thinking that you've written down all your notes, until you wake up and realize you did nothing.

Ask me if an outfit makes you look fat? I'll say VERY!

Get annoyed when I click on the "popular" button and it's always the same things.

When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

When well dressed, someone ask me what I do for a living, I say nothing and watch the confused look come over their face.

When you walk across a cross walk and you stretch your steps so it takes one step for each line, yet you still try to look casual because ur in public

Read the time on your watch, then after a few minutes, read it again because you forgot it.

I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

start telling someone a story and then realize that i would only be funny if they actually saw it.

Wonder if the life your living is one long dream and your gonna wake up and be some type of alien.

Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos

I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.

When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

I wake up right before the "sexy" part happens...

Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

I **** with no hands.

I was not born in the country I am living in now

Go to fart while you have the flu, only to find out it wasn't a fart at all....

Wait until my friends are done eating lunch so I don't have to dump my tray alone.

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.