In the shower i let water run down my hands so it looks like i'm shooting water out of my fingers.

When I am making toast I spread the butter or jam with a spoon

When I'm laying in bed in the dark and I close my eyes for a while then when I open them again I quickly scan for a light source just to make sure I can still see.

I don't know why but I really wish I can ride a bike or drive a car through a shopping mall.

I drive in the car then suddenly awake from a day dream and realize ive driven for the last 4 miles with no recollection of the journey.

Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

Have a sudden urge to say "bomb" at an airport.

Whenever you make cereal, you eat exactly where you make it like on the table.

I can only play a piano with my right hand

When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

When having a flog in the shower I keep checking the door to make sure noone walks in

When you're lying in bed and you fart, you pull the covers over your head to smell it.

When at a restaurant you practice your order inside your head, then when you actually have to order you mess it up.

Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

Bored. Open refrigerator. Nothing to eat. Open it again five minutes later.

Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

Wishing you were living in that time when men were still gentlemen. Holds doors, brings flowers, chooses you over job.

Making gang signs out the window when your parents let you ride in the front seat

Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

try to rip the top off an Oreo without messing up the cream and then if the cream comes out on both parts not wanting to eat the Oreo because its wrong.

Panic when your car alarm goes off while you are going to get in because you suddenly look like a criminal.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.