When at Burger King, McDonalds etc. I always finish the drink before the food so that I still have the taste of the food in my mouth when I'm finished.

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Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

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When no one is around, kick a push door open to feel like a badass.

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I rate certain songs on my iPod higher than others because if someone else is checking out my playlists, I don't want them knowing how much I really love that super cheesy song from the early 90's (even though every time it comes on, I hit repeat at least 3 times and sing aloud as loudly as I think I can get away with. I really, really love that song!).

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Waiting alone inside a public toilet for someone to come in and open the door.... so you don't have to touch the handle!

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thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

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I don't like to meet people when I'm well dressed because that's not me all of the time.

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Save more than once on your favourite game.

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Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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Sometimes, when I'm at work, I j3rk 0ff in the bathroom. Please tell me someone else has done this????

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Sometimes I think of doing really bad things and smirk, only to later regret even thinking of it and start questioning myself while feeling bad about it.

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Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

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You or someone you know has a secret crush/liking but the always shout it to the world. My sister does that.(It's why I ask)

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put wood glue on my hand, blow it dry and peel it off to make fake skin

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I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

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It takes me a whole afternoon to write an important/professional email cause i keep thinking about what I should and should not write and it gets so stupidly difficult I take one hour breaks between every sentence.

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when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

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Sometimes when I fart while sitting down, I lift one leg up.

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I'm not bad looking and I don't fall into the beautiful category either but I really feel good about the way I look

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get some of the lyrics to a song wrong. you know theyre wrong, but continue to sing the wrong words anyway, because the real words just don't seem to fit.

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Whenever on a car ride, pretend you are in a military convoy and shoot at pursuing helicopters and soldiers.

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Whenever I pull a long hair from my vagina or butt, it feels good.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.