I talk to inanimate objects daily.

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I always ask myself "Why am I me?". But have never come up with a good answer.

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If I'm walking with or behind someone I always match their footsteps

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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Going through a lot of Deja Vu lately, it feels like you have another life before this one.

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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have you ever thought of a relative when masturbating?

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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in the morning when you wake up and take a shower you make weird faces to stretch out and "warm up" your face for the day

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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I giggle in my head when anyone says duty.

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recycle the peanuts in my poop to make organic peanut butter

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Eat everything inside my burgers first then i eat the buns.

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LOG OFF OF ICHAT BECAUSE THE PERSON U WERE JUST TALKING TO WENT OFFLINE.

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expecting to get on this website to find something funny but instead finding crappy posts.

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I have tried jumping in an airplane to see if I fall in the same spot

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Having more dificulty thinking in your native language than your 2nd or 3rd one. Or 4th one. Or... the rest. I highly doubt that one's common.

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Use the letters on my phone to make words to help me remember important numbers

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Drive slow in straightaways and fast through curves, especially sharp ones.

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Fake an orgasm after only 30 seconds, watch the "wtf" look on her face then laugh hysterically.

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I can only brush my teeth at exactly 7:43 AM...Am I weird?

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Imagine myself going back in time and giving my friends and family little hints on how their life will pan out.

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Discovering your friend is an indian (Nicole)

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I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.