When you're walking and think of something funny and start laughing, but you don't want people to think you're weird, so you pull out your phone and pretend you're texting.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

sometimes when i wipe my nose a booger will get on my hand then ill get to lazy to get it off and wipe it under my chair.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

Tap my fingers really rapidly when I'm annoyed, stressed out, fed up or angry.

thumb_up thumb_down -69

(okay maybe not a thing I do but something I noticed) When people call themselves "Writers" In today's world you know that might not be the case because we have computers so shouldn't they be called typers?

thumb_up thumb_down -71

when you're walking down the streets and you listen to your iPod, you pretend you're part of the music video for that song and when no ones looking, lip sync to the lyrics, as if the camera man's filming you >.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

Pretending I'm on my cellphone in public.

thumb_up thumb_down -75

Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

thumb_up thumb_down -75

You see someone do something cool and imagine doing it in front of all your friends

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Whenever Terminator 2 is on tv, I become enthralled and can't stop watching even though I've seen it a million times.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

I hum the MLP:FIM theme and hope no one recognizes the tune.

thumb_up thumb_down -81

....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

thumb_up thumb_down -83

When a tooth is very loose,i shake it with my tongue because that pain is relaxing.

thumb_up thumb_down -97

I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava

thumb_up thumb_down -107

I have minions that do what I want because pleasing me makes them happy. Moral: I control, the way you move, how do you like my grove zerg dude?

thumb_up thumb_down -115

Run faster down hotel corridors.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Still sitting on the toilet 20 minutes after you're done crapping... you're not alone.. -Professor.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Get somewhat worried about myself if I'm thumbed down on THIS SITE.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Sometimes I'll think about something that's so weird nobody would ever do it, and then i figure there's a big chance somebody did it at least once in history.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

At work or in public and I am wearing snug pants I think sexy thoughts so I'll have half a harding and make people think it's that big all the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.