Press harder on the remote when I know the batteries are dead.

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dip my fries in ice cream! sometimes in soda. It's good!

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A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

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Constantly refresh your email page even though you know nothing will appear.

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When I hear footsteps approaching while I'm sitting on the toilet, I'm getting ready to jump at the door in case I actually forgot to lock it.

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That awkward moment when you thought the other person opened the door for you to go in first, when it was actually for that person.

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Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

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While I Am on the computer late at night, my Mum tells me to go to bed, I say I will in a second. I stay for a few more minutes, my mum tells me again, I do the same thing...

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Think that the person driving keeps staring at me when ever they look in the mirror and I'm sat in the back.

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Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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Stab myself on a daily basis

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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Pretend to listen to music, but just do it so nobody talks to me or i simply just ignore them.

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Think that some minutes feel shorter than others

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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Laugh when something happens to someone, but when the exact same happens to you, you say "Its not funny"

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You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

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If I have to get up early the following day I will surprisingly wake up early even without an alarm

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.