Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

Put my hands together the 'other' way

laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

I have a phobia of incest

Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

When eating chips I always look at each side before eating it to choose which side will taste better

Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

While in the shower, after ive used soap and stuff i turn the water to cold and i pretend im on fear factor and close my eyes so i cannot see what i am trying to get while crawling through freezing cold water

When you cringe as you walk out of a store because you're paranoid the door will beep...

Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

When the T.V switches to commercial sometimes I forget what I was watching Noel

Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

I piss in the bed every night

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.