Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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Sometimes when I'm bored I start shouting things in German.

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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You are thinking of really awkward moments that happened earlier in the day so then you subconsciously say a bunch of random things quickly out loud to get the thought of the awkward moment out of your head.

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Avoid eating at parties to look as though you're not hungry

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Put my hands together the 'other' way

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laugh whenever I see an infomercial where the hosts glorify their products to the point where it seems like they have found Jesus it is hilarious.

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I have a phobia of incest

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Trying to do things before the microwave beeps .

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I like to lather my entire body with Nutella and put paper in my hands and stand there acting like a tree.

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Be talking to someone about something random, then a few days later or so... something very relevant to that happens, then you think to yourself "I'm sure I can tell the future"... I'm very confident that, that is just me...

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Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

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sometimes i feel like the person i look at in the mirror is not my own reflection

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When eating chips I always look at each side before eating it to choose which side will taste better

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Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

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Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

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While in the shower, after ive used soap and stuff i turn the water to cold and i pretend im on fear factor and close my eyes so i cannot see what i am trying to get while crawling through freezing cold water

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When you cringe as you walk out of a store because you're paranoid the door will beep...

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Invented a special password for yourself in order to recognize yourself if travel through time.

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When the T.V switches to commercial sometimes I forget what I was watching Noel

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Half of these posts are all but "things you think only you do". So is mine

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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

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I piss in the bed every night

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.