When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I can't step on the cracks of sidewalks.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

You look over the edge of a tall building/structure, and have that sudden urge to jump off.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I'm in the middle of a good dream but I wake up and try to go back to sleep to finish it when it never happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Seeing an acquaintance who you would feel awkward talking to in a public place, knowing they see you as well, and pretending not to see them, while hoping they pretend not to see you as well.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

thumb_up thumb_down -3

i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Sometimes when I'm laughing really hard I awkwardly clap my hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Guessing on those annoying Captcha things and then getting unnecessarily angry when it tells you you're wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whenever someone enters a pin number I always try to see how many number I can remember

thumb_up thumb_down -21

when sleeping over at someone's house, make a cringing, weird looking face while opening the fridge in the middle of the night like somehow the look on your face will change the volume of the seal breaking open

thumb_up thumb_down -21

We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I wonder if elections are rigged?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I used to peep when my relatives are watching porn, back when i was a kid. After that, i feel like i wanna pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I hold my breath in elevators

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Sometime when I'm alone, I like to fill my bathtub with marinara sauce and pretend I'm a meatball.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

when your professor describes their wife or husband you imagine their wife or husband.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.