No ones home. Go to youtube and do karaoke. Can the neighbors here me? Guess im not talking to them ever again...

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poke fun at somebody and pray for forgiveness the following night

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Only use the left earphone.

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Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

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standing at the mall with your group talking, you all decide to start walking to a store, start to follow but half the group stays behind for a few seconds then they start walking, walk a slower pace only to find out that you're in the middle of your split groups e.g. 3 in front 4 behind...dont know which one to merge to......wait for your group to collaborate back together.

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Sitting down in the shower

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I always have trouble leaving a airplanes lavatory I never get the door open

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i masturbate with my feet

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When I see a pregnant woman I can't help but think "she had sex"

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I have autofocus in my eyes.

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make south park refferences every day

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When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.

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When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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When the wind is blowing like crazy, I pretend I am the god who controls it.

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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I find that whenever I go somewhere it always seems to take longer than when I come back home

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Whenever you shave, you make sure you cut both ends of your moustache, leaving a small patch in the middle above your lips. Then you pretend to be Hitler ;)

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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I was the real Stig...

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Start to cry when your alone, but stop yourself because you don't want to look like a pussy.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.