Get scared of the dark while in bed, so you make sure all limbs are tucked nice and tight under the covers. Once done, you now feel safe..

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

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thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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freak out if poster or pictures eyes are looking at me and can't have pictures in my room of famous people, however if I'm out and scared i have to have the pictures on my phone look at me for safety.....really wondering if any one else has this

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Imagine flying things and epic battles when listening to music.

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Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

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I wonder if elections are rigged?

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Right before I go to the dentist I brush my teeth.

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RE:" pee on the side of the toilet" you dont pee on the side of the toilet so it isn't loud. you pee on the side so it doesn't splash on you're legs as much.

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i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

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If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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only read the short jokes on this website

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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(1) In the middle of a conversation, I start to think of all the crazy stuff I could do even though I would never want to i.e. punching them in the face, making out with them, flashing them.

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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I sometimes chew on the inside of my cheek

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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I'm a man. When I'm watching a movie with my wife and it has a sad ending. I allways have to cry but moments before the actual end has come I allready start to snif my nose so that she thinks I have a cold and do not have to cry about the ending of the movie.

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing

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Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.