Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

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Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

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touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

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strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

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Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

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Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

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Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

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If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

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I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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I can only play a piano with my right hand

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I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

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I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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I used to eat bath bubbles

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fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.