Always have your feet under the cover, and if not, you think that something will get you.

Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

skipping back to the start of the guitar solo over and over so I can pretend I'm playing it

touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

Sometimes I imagine that I am in a coma and all of the things of this world are not real. Then when I wake up from the coma I will be the best inventor of all time.

Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

If someone tells me what I did when I was drinking and it's stupid or embarrassing I pretend I don't remember because I was too drunk.

I think any disasterous accidents will not happen to me.

Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

I can only play a piano with my right hand

I still put my thumb in my mouth, BUT only because I like the feel of putting my eye lashes under my fingernails and my thumb inconveniantly fits in my mouth. Now I know I'm the only person in the world who does this. I'm trying to drop the habit. But it feels so GOOD!

I love the We'll Be Right Back jingle on the Eric Andre show.

Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

I used to eat bath bubbles

fart and then breathe it in really quick hoping no one else smells it first

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.