check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

I piss in the bed every night

When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

I have a band in my head that performs for me every time I listen to music.

When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

When you look at the sidewalk and try to step on the boxes instead of the lines, and feel like you need to do it a number of times per leg to make it even.

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.