when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

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The only time I seem to look at the clock is when the numbers read my birth date.

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Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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Hide important things in places at home but forget later where you hid them.

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

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trying not to laugh when reading things that you do in "Things You Only Think You Do" in fear your parents will mistake your laughter as you fapping.

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When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

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I like asking my wife how her SIMIANS are doing (the sims 4) because its fun watching her try to hide the fact that it annoys her. Nero, now if you thought Moral Man the Friendly neighbourhood r*pist was bad... Well, thumb me down I dare you! Seriously I totally did not have a certain bitch turkish hacker put a tracker on my laptop si I can find out where you live... And pay some guy to break your kneecaps... I only done it twice though... Here on horsehead network :) Third time is a charm ;) NERO: Actually I paid people five times, the fourth did not do his job, so I pay a fifth to FINISH HIM! (Sometimes I think people on craigslist just like to kill for the fun of it, seriously, eighty bucks?)

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getting furius wen ppl hav bad speling n grammer

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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Love to check my astrological compatibility with my favorite musicians.

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Start to cry when your alone, but stop yourself because you don't want to look like a pussy.

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You pretend to fight imaginary people while no ones looking:/ But you look like the star wars kid...

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realize that no one is listening to me talk so I say something completely random to try and get there attention

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Sing every word to Bohemian Rhapsody every time you hear it in the most dramatic way possible.

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I take a poop and then stand up to pee because I'm a man

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Chew as quietly as possible when eating cookies but as loud as possible when eating fruit.

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Sitting down on the toitlet to pee (being a male). It's so comfortable when you're tired. Also: Wonder if there's a female version of this, where girls stand up to take a piss. Just curiosity.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.