I don't like being told what I will do or how I will feel.

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I sleep in my underpants every single night

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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I doodle on everything I get that can be doodled on, even my exams :)

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Not likeing something someone posted because you have a secret crush on them and you don't want them to think you check there Facebook too much.

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Sleep with pillow between legs

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When I'm making a weird face, I remind my self to stop before it gets stuck like that.

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Sing along to the radio in the car then stop at a red light when you realize other people can see you more easily.

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Run into a wall and say "I'm sorry" and then realize that it's just a wall.

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Tip my couch over to dig for something I have lost and then end up finding a bunch of random crap.

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When you think about your life then think your parents had to have sex to make you. Then start thinking about all the gross old teachers you've had that probably had sex. Then when you get older your parents tell you about all the times they had sex when you were in the house.

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play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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I pee in the shower. :3

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Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

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You question gods existence and evolution but then quickly tell herself hes real so you don't get struck with a lighting bolt

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Feeling sorry for inanimate objects

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Imagining how it would feel to switch bodies with your crush

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When I'm in the car I imagine I'm Superman flying along next to the car, whipping under, over and around traffic signs, trees, and fences. Sometimes I then fly up above the traffic a little. Then I get worried I will cause a traffic accident because people will be watching me instead of the road. I've done this since I was a kid. I'm 45 now and I still do it! Sometimes I'm Spider-Man, swing and jumping from truck to truck, car to car to keep moving fast along the highway. And lately, sometimes I do the Superman flying thing, but as Iron Man.

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When I am making submissions to this site I sometimes accidentally put them in the comment section

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When I dont feel like sweeping I sweep the stuff under the fridge or something

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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We keep a spare key hidden outside somewhere in case we are locked out

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Nero the clit collector. What+ you never collected stamps, coins or something? YOUR CRIMES! WHAT ARE YOUR CRIMES FOR FUCKlNG CRIMES SAKE ETC.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.