Use the massaging shower head on my anus to power blast the poop plaque away

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Run faster down hotel corridors.

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Start the shower so no one hears you shit bricks

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Feeling sorry for objects to throw away!! Haha anyone els?

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I put a cigarette lighter in a fireplace, anyone else?

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I have the background on my computer a picture of some cartoon characters,and when I'm alone I talk to the screen like those characters are actually in the room. -Briarwoodninja

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strawberry flavored hemorrhoid cream

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Chewing your chips softer so you can hear the tv

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I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

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I love touching, squeezing and occasionally biting my dog's (read: any dog's) muzzle. I love the texture and the gummy-ness. I also love how pissed he gets when I do it and sneezes after.

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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When watching TV shows, I always think about what I would have done differently if I was the character in that particular situation.

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after brushing my teeth I chew on the granules that are on my teeth

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When in shower, I turn the heat to max for a few minutes to warm up the whole bathroom.

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Listening to a song, thinking about having the life of the singer in the band

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When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

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1. When you're downstairs at night you go upstairs as fast as fucking possible. 2. When you switch volume in TV, the second number has to be 0 or 5.

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I can only play a piano with my right hand

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I think some songs would be better if they didn't put a rap in with them

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humiliating little girls

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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I am 23 and I know how to spell "STORK"

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I have won so many competitions online for things like being the 99, 999th visitor on the site

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Use reverse psychology on the rain to make it slow down or speed up.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.