Turn shower water all the way up hot before getting out because it feels good

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Blow into the shower head when I'm taking a shower to make what sounds like jet noises

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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

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I have won so many competitions online for things like being the 99, 999th visitor on the site

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Eating chicken at KFC.

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I sometimes wonder if the world is even real.

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Pick your butt and then wipe your hand/fingers somewhere hoping that the smell dosn't stick to you and that no one smells it....

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Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

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Pay attention to commercial breaks to see if there is ever a break without an advertisement about cars or new movies coming out

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Count the number of times someone knocks on a door on television.

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When im home alone, i watch porn with the volume turned up really loud.

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use the hair drier to dry my balls after shower

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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Going to the bathroom in public just to scratch my butt

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Imagin what would happen if there was a zombie invasion just at your house.

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after i take a poop i stand up turn around and piss on my poop to try to split it in half

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when you are at home doing something then all of a sudden you imagine how you would take down a killer if he came into your home right now. just me?

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I have autofocus in my eyes.

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Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.

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I have just one thing to say to all the women who look at me as a sex object. Hey.

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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When you're scared of the bathroom and you close your eyes you quickly look around to check if there's a monster or something in the mirror

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Dilikes the Gangnam Style.

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Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.