Whenever i do something bad to someone I can't stop smiling even though i never wanted to smile in the first place and i feel like people think I'm a terrible person

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Open my mouth while doing my mascara... it's impossible not to!!!

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When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

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When my girlfriend ask me what I am thinking about, I tell her I am thinking of all the great things about my last girlfriend.

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Multi task while your brushing your teeth and forget you have a tooth brush in your mouth.

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When walking around a slightly empty store, I walk around and pretend I'm a spy, trying not to be seen.

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Tear up when I poop

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get really freaked out when your in a parking lot and the car next to you starts backing up and you think your moving forward.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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When I wake up after having a good dream I try to remember it but I don't

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when your doing something or going somewhere you think didn't I already do this, like your back in time.

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If I see the same model of vehicle as mine in a parking lot, I get overly excited if I manage to get a parking spot next to it. Extra points for same color or type (i.e. quad cab vs regular cab).

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Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

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I lift my butt when I'm farting

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When you are reading a book and find that you are narrating the words you read in the book, to yourself. You feel weird, so you try to stop doing this by reading further or focusing more on the book.

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When I blow my nose I think I'm blowing my brains out and certain parts of things I learned at school are going into the tissue and will be forgotten forever.

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Cheak the fridge every 5 minuets waiting for food to just "magicly" appear

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When I used to go on car rides at night I would look up at the moon and I would think it was following us.

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Whilst passing a mega dump or room clearer as my brother calls them I come up with songs...sometimes in spanish

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Turn volume down on iPod or tv, then turn up one bar to make it seem like it's still loud.

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(okay maybe not a thing I do but something I noticed) When people call themselves "Writers" In today's world you know that might not be the case because we have computers so shouldn't they be called typers?

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Pretending you're a badass character from an anime or movie when listening to rock music (or something similar)

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Love to check my astrological compatibility with my favorite musicians.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.