when someones child falls and cries while you walking through town and you laugh to yourself

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Think long and hard about something but then realise you don't care

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Mares really turn me on, so I download "bad stuff" Ironically though, I worked at a farm last summer and realized there is nothing more disgusting than reality. Still mares turn me on... If on video.

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Set multiple alarms to wake me up in the morning so I dont just turn it off and fall back asleep

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Wake up after a dream. About a day later you think about if it was real or not.

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Wait until my significant other is in shower and then let loose the longest, loudest fart that's been building in me all night and pray it's muffled by the mattress and the covers.

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shit corn, even though i havent recently eaten corn.

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Feel like something is behind you/watching you, run to your room super quickly and get into the room before that something gets you

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When home alone and you hear a noise getting out a gun/weapon.

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acting as if you can shoot with a banana

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Walking around on the streets wondering if you are really walking in place, and the earth is spinning according to how you walk, like a treadmill.

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Stop singing about weed when you see a cop car.

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When a passneger in the car, I sing songs in my head and hope the song is in time with the signs and streetlights as I drive past them.

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Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

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Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

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Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

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Listening to more obscure music in a public place and turning it up in hopes that someone will ask you what you're listening to and you can tell them about it/open their minds.

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i pull for the chicken when peter and the chicken fight on family guy cause peter is a jackhole

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When A situation Doesn't go how I wanted it to go, It annoys me so much I sometimes shit in my hands and clap.

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When I'm walking and I step on a crack with my left food, the next time I step on a crack it has to be my right foot and vise versa. I can't step on a crack twice in a row with the same foot. But I don't have to step on every crack.

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While talking on the phone you can't think of anything to say then it gets awkwardly quiet

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feel like im being watched turn my head sideways and see someone suddenly look away.

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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see a old couple in the street and think," i wonder if he still bangs her" lol

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.