When masturbating at night, looking at the window paranoid that someone is watching. But stopping or moving out of view.

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Pretending there is a man running beside you during a long car journey and jumping over obstacles

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I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

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If my SOLVE media is too long I refresh it to give me a shorter one

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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Sometimes when I kill a bug, i wrap it up in a giant wad of paper towels, put it in a plastic sandwich bag, THEN throw it away. just in case...

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Not eat French fries because I don't like the taste rather than because they are unhealthy?

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After reading something from this site, I find myself compelled to try it.

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Eating chicken at KFC.

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When your at your friends house and they run out of toilet paper, so you sit there like "what do i do now?"

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I talk through my teeth when i am talking to my pets.

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When looking at a digital clock that counts down to seconds, I wait until the seconds are an even number, then I try to say each number in order twice before it changes.

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Layer the water in the toilet with toilet paper, so when I poo the water does splash back up and splatter poo and water all over my bum

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Wish that illegal Mexicans would stop driving drunk and uninsured and killing innocent legal people or injuring them for life and leaving them in medical debt.

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When someone wants to kill a bug, I'll get insane and catch the bug, then run out and release the bug while saying "NOW YOU'RE FREE!!!!!"

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Leave the fan on at night just in case you feel to warm.

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When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

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When i talk i say i like how or i hate that.

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Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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Sometimes, I wonder why god or the big bang ever existed in the first place and why there is a universe in the first place ... And it makes my brain hurt!

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When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

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When two people in my house are arguing, I stay in my room to avoid awkwardly interrupting them and being dragged into it.

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Accidently send an empty text or text multiple people and send wrong text to wrong person

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.