check to see if post has any likes right after posting it. then have second thoughts about it.

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Make fun of someone for something. Then realize you do the same thing

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Intentionally utilize uncommon vocabulary to replace colloquial slang for the pure purpose of entertainment (for oneself). :D

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Feel bad about hurting someone a long time ago, when I was a child, and wish I could speak to that person and say "I'm sorry." Cringe whenever the thought of the incident rises.

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Realized with 7 billion people, there is a chance that someone else on earth is doing exactly the same thing as me at any given time.

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I piss in the bed every night

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When I'm home alone, I start hearing random noises and think someone is breaking in.

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Sometimes I get annoyed when I realize none of my friends ever eat vegetables or drink anything but sugary soda`s and are somehow as healthy, sometimes even healthier than me.

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When I am in a bind and I know I need help I just say " I gott this" and things work out

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You think about all the stupid things you did in elementary school and avoid anyone who went to your elementary school in high school.

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get happy as sh*t when you remember your homework is do after your lunch period so you can do it then, but never end up doing it.

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I have a band in my head that performs for me every time I listen to music.

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When you have a stuffy nose, and you put tissue in one nostril so you can breathe.

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When you look at the sidewalk and try to step on the boxes instead of the lines, and feel like you need to do it a number of times per leg to make it even.

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Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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(I have made this mistake mostly when I'm at the movies) When the cashier gives me the ticket and says enjoy the movie because I am so used to people saying have a nice day I say you too!(FACE PALM)

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Sometimes, when I'm alone and it's dark outside, I like to cover my body in petroleum jelly and pretend to be a slug.

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I am a masculine guy but in private I listen to very sensitive songs. ie: careless wispers

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Make sure I put the deodorant top back on the correct way -- you know, so the sticker is to the front.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.