I TALK WITH PEDOBEAR ABOUT OUR BUSINESS ;)

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All of my friends go to halloween parties. I still go trick or treating.

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Watch peoples body language and see if they're on the same pace of thought as i am and then try to speed up my thinking to pretend or act like I am realizing something they are not.

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Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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....you're high and you think you write complete bullshit?

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When Ive already talked to somebody , I think of things I couldve said to make the converstion better

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eat the muffin bottom because it isn't as good as the top and i want to get it over with

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When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

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I try to say something, but a bunch of people are talking at the same time so I yell at them to shut up and as soon as I say something I realize I was wrong so I say"okay" as calm as possible to keep from looking like a douche

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I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

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Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

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When you do something really cool but no one is there to see it and it's pointless to try and tell them about it because they don't believe you

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Spend ages searching for a porno (normally about 40 minutes), search through it for the best bit, finish and think "what was the point of all that"

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when you've done everything you wanted to do on the internet and stop and just stare at the screen.

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turn the cover of a magazine around because i have a weird paranoia that the government slipped in tiny cameras on the eyes of the person in the cover.

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Pretend the legs of a chair are the barrels of a mini gun while moving them.

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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I cover the mirror on my bedroom door with a sheet at night, because I think the shadows casted in the mirror are gonna get me.

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When I am driving and I see another car being pulled over I think "Oh, so I am not the only one"

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Count how many steps there are in a stairwell I use often and then try to take it by same number each time... Eg if there are 16 then always go by twos and missing the others!?!?!?

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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When something funny happens think of it a couple days later than laugh,everyone then looks at me weirdly.

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Think of the most awkward or dreadful thing you could possibly do in any given situation and be almost compelled to do it but then realising that you could never show your face anywhere ever again if you did.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.