When I Download A Song Or Movie And The Download Speed Slows Down I Think The FBI Is Tracking Me.

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When you see someone you know in a shopping centre and you pretend that you didnt see them at all because you cant be bothered striking up a conversation.

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Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.

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I know how to Gleek on command. (Don't know what it is just look it up.)

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Sleep with pillow between legs

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i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"

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When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

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When you need something from someone and you forget what it's called,So then you have to awkwardly explain it.

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I pretend I'm a really popular YouTuber and talk to nobody thinking they're my subscribers.

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I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

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wipe all the water off my body (predrying myself) before i get out of the shower, and dry myself with the towel

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Listening to my iPod with other people walking by me or sitting near me and feeling mysterious and cool.

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Spread my butt so poop comes out easier.

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Sometimes I blink and act like I am taking a picture with my eyes.

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Thinking ambient thoughts while fondling myself into a semi hard-on.

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Being in the car and wondering if your parents can read your mind so you think "If you can here me cough in 3, 2, 1..." Sometimes my dad actually does it and he looks back at me and smiles. .-.

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I still hum songs that I made up when I was a little kid

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Whenever someone enters a pin number I always try to see how many number I can remember

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I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

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Write b as d and d as b or p as q and q as p. I mostly write b as d and d as b since I've learned the alphabet. Trying not to do that now

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Justin Beiber is a woman

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doesn't eat meal until desired tv show starts.

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Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

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I used to think that if the earth was completely smoothed flat and you had a really powerful telescope if you looked through it you would see yourself looking through the telescope.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.