Talking to yourself in your head so you don't seem so crazy.

If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?

I wonder what it wonder be like to have a really tall girlfriend?

feel like your calculator is judging/making fun of you for looking up simple equations

Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

When standing in long lines (stores, banks etc..) I think about how other people would react if I puked all over the place with no warning.

Pretend to listen to music, but just do it so nobody talks to me or i simply just ignore them.

Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

I DO wish I had the ability of the guy in the comment below me. Moral: Yeah I have to type moral down here, because its awesome and because whatever its awesome!

Look into your neighbor's house and halucinate someone watching back

never wanting to poop in other houses. You have to use your toilet

I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

Before going to the bathroom, check behind the shower curtains for serial killers.

while I am sitting on the toilet I play with it and waste the toilet paper and of course i just keep flushing it

Whe someone buys you a gift and you think they have installed a camera into it or can somehow mentally see you when that gift is near you. Resulting in you acting strange around that it or when you are present in the same room as that gift

I hold my breath in elevators

Accidentally scratching a surface and then scratching it again with the tops of your fingernails to even it out.

Justin Beiber is a woman

sometimes I can be really tired but when I go to bed I lie there for hours awake

When a book is boring, i will think of my favouite song and then i will start singing the book, like i will look at the words and ligit, start singing them in my favourite tune~im so weird

judge a spider on it's ability to hide from me and decide to let it survive if I consider it a clever hiding place, then get paranoid because the spider was smart.

I'm a guy and I like to wear swimwear as underwear

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.