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Anti-Pickup Line
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Pointless Inventions
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Looking up your teachers on facebook just to look at their photos
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-62
i masturbate with my feet
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-62
Thinking about a situation someone else in the world might be in. For example, Someone dying and the pain they must be going through.
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-62
When I post a picture on a Horsehead Huffer site that I made on Microsoft Paint, and it ends up being one of those that never load, I go back on Paint and save it again. Then I repost it, and it works.
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-64
When passed by a very attractive girl in the street, turn around and look after her and/or follow her to the next street corner, in order to grasp more of her beauty.
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-66
I have to sleep with my bottom lip stuck to the pillow or my hand so I can breathe.
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-66
Reading your facebook posts that you wrote a year ago or more, and think of how stupid you were at that time.
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-68
IM 13 years old when i touch something i have a feeling and wont let me do anything until i touch it again or 4 times or sometimes even 16 times i cant live like this its weird!!!!
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-74
I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.
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-74
Whenever you shave, you make sure you cut both ends of your moustache, leaving a small patch in the middle above your lips. Then you pretend to be Hitler ;)
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-76
Sometimes I wonder why I smell even though I remember putting DO on. I become embarrassed because there is a girl next to me. I hope she cannot smell it. Finally I realize its not me. It's her.
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-76
I was not born in the country I am living in now
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-78
Laying in bed at a friends place with your eyes closed imaging where you would end up if you got up and went to the toilet as if it was your own house.
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-80
Start to cry when your alone, but stop yourself because you don't want to look like a pussy.
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-98
Sometimes I wait a long time to pee when I really have to go. It feels good.
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-102
I have a phobia of incest
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-126
If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.
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+37
Sometimes I accidentally move my mouth in a way where it suddenly makes a random farting noise so I immediately just make more obviously made fart noises just so people wont think I actually farted. Is that only me?
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+19
Sometimes I have something I want to do and then walk into the room to do it in and forget exactly what I was trying to do, it usually involves the kitchen so I just look in the refrigerator then leave and then remember what it is I wanted to do.
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+9
When you Saigon the couch and say "I am hungry" but then don't do anything because you are too lazy.
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-1
I sometime's wonder if other people can see and feel everything I can but are just in my body too judge me.
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-1
Turn off light in bed... notice something you haven't seen before. IT'S SLENDERMAN You turn the light back on and realized it was a lamp
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-3
Think that some minutes feel shorter than others
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-3
i absolutely hate the number nine, and when i told my brother this i was like "sometimes i wish i could delete the number 9" and hes like "but then youd have 9 numbers" and i was like..... "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"
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-5
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Things You Think Only You Do
A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.