That feeling you get where you slip on something but you save yourself just in time and your just like "holy crap, i almost cracked my head and died," then two minutes later your legs are still shaking

thumb_up thumb_down -35

I cant ride a bike

thumb_up thumb_down -35

in a grocery store, only walking on the colored single tiles the entire time your in there pretending there small cliffs without touching the white one otherwise you fall and fail.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

i talk to myself in the mirror just to see how i look when im talking to somebody else, i even practice faces and my laugh (i should get a life)

thumb_up thumb_down -37

I go to the fridge, see that there is nothing I want to eat in it, and then go back to it a minute later hoping that something I like has materialized

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Masturbate. Sometimes two or three times a day.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

thumb_up thumb_down -59

When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

thumb_up thumb_down -67

I like to go out without shoes on hot days and play the floor is lava

thumb_up thumb_down -109

when listening to pandora just skip through the songs and hit the like or hate buttons and not listen to the music,but then when you want to listen to the music you can't because theres no wifi

thumb_up thumb_down -121

Sometimes when someone says something to me, I will hear them perfectly clear, but I will instinctively say "what?"

thumb_up thumb_down -129

If I get lost while driving, the first thing I do is turn down the radio.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Take your laptop to the toilet with you, as a modern day equivalent of the newspaper.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Feeling sorry for objects to throw away!! Haha anyone els?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

When someone is really, really angry is telling me their story, I keep a straight face but I can't help mentally laughing my ass off because of their weird facial expressions. Sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

thinking "what if people can read my mind" then cant stop thinking dirty things about people around me

thumb_up thumb_down -6

TV turned on just so... Makes you not feeling alone or because some other unknown (or) irrational reason.And of course, feeling guilty cause you spending energy and money but still... Most of the time you just don't care.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Going to sleep during class thinking that you've written down all your notes, until you wake up and realize you did nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Think of all the perverted and disgusting things that I'd like to do to the women at work then feel bad for being a vile and disgusting person, then kind of feel turned on anyway lol.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Say "Up and Down" for "Left or Right"

thumb_up thumb_down -58

i see things on this site and am secretly glad im not weird like everyone else

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

thumb_up thumb_down -74

I used to shower with my cat which struggles like hell, even though it loves getting fucking filthy, one day it even bit my dick. I still shower with my cat.

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Watch a familiar movie, and then freak out when you see a suspensful part, only to later realize that there was no point in getting worked up since you already know what happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.