I asked telemarketers for their home number so I can call them at home and disturb THEM while they're relaxing with THEIR family

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Stop at the beginning of an escalator, and let the stairs drag you forward by just your toes.

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Try to find the perfect stride length so you don't have to walk all weird to avoid stepping on a sidewalk crack. Fail miserably but keep walking weird.

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When I piss in the toilet (naw, naw in the microwave, god) I try to pee on one side so the bubbles spin around the flush to see if it keeps spinning

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I throw a piece of paper in the toilet and try to "sink it" either with my "super stream wave" and if it does not work, I unleash my secret (but not always available weapon) "dept charge bombs".

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Turn the door knob while closing the door ...so it doesn't make a loud noise.

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Imagine your in action movies and die for a girl while your lying there trying too sleep and realising you are deep in thought about something that your too chicken to do.

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When you're chatting with a friend while you're walking around and not really paying attention then you turn around to took at your friend and you realise you've been talking to someone you don't even know the entire time.

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get a really delicious smelling soap or candle and feel sad when you remember you can't eat it.

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Courtesy flush.

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Deside to watch a video in bed on your phone or iPad and drop it on your face...

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When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

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Check every spoon fork and knife in the silverware drawer for spots or old food before you choose which one to eat with

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Sitting down in the shower

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Think of something to post but cant put it into words.

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Wondering what would happen if you did something super random or inappropriate in a group setting. :)

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Thinking about a situation someone else in the world might be in. For example, Someone dying and the pain they must be going through.

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Left alone Big noise, people aren't expected back as soon so grab baseball bat and charge only to find them back early...."what you doing?" "batting my socks around practising my baseball skills"

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I hate it when people assume I'm smart just because I don't speak much and I wear glasses.

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Thinking you're very popular after you have owned someone at school.

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Sometimes I blow my nose on yesterday's socks because it is the closest thing to the bed in the morning and I'm too lazy to get up and go for a tissue. O_o

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(Men) When you have to poop and pee at the same time, you stand to pee, and THEN sit to poop. Just out of principle.

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Lightly touching your stomach or other body parts with your fingers to get that tickling sensation.

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If im taking a crap in the public washrooms and someone walks in I try to make covering noise as soon as its about to plop.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.