Try to figure out if some of the posts were written by the same person.

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I have to stop the Microwave on 0 but before it beeps or I'm not going to get what I want in life. OCD MUCH

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the power to regenerate your appendix

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Peel my mandarin oranges in one try

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Waiting with a friend the microwave countdown finish and when comes to 0 shout "Happy New Year!" and we hug each other

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Sit on the back of the commode when at work to give yourself an impromptu break.

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Taking the time to lick all of the cream off of the inside of an Oreo.

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Point your finger to the sky when your favorite song comes on in the club or the radio

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You feel compelled to stab someone in the face... But you don't since you know its wrong. Instead you play violent video games to get it off your mind.

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after taking a dump i always still smell a little bit of poop and i wonder if other people smell it too

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Smoking in the shower.

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only read the short jokes on this website

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I have an irrational fear of automatic flushing toilets.

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I feel strange when I look at someone and think ''This person has had sex''

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Lay between the wall and the bed when the bed is pefectly fine

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Pick your butt and then wipe your hand/fingers somewhere hoping that the smell dosn't stick to you and that no one smells it....

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Hate when I can't sleep and the sun starts to come up and I hear birds chirping and i get worried and just realize that I should be happy that it's a new day and to relax.

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when you wake up in the morning to a text and you read it with one eye open

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When listening to a song with headphones or on the radio i sing the harmonies or make them while they sing the lead

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I have autofocus in my eyes.

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Get soo scared in the shower when your home alone that you are scared to open the curtain just incase somebody is out tthere

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When I watch porn, I only watch like the first 5-10 minutes of it. To be honest I wonder why people bother making them longer too.

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Scratch inside my ear, then lick the finger I used.

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Sometimes I wonder how food tastes when not drowned in ketchup.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.