The older I get the more honest I get

When you are outside, you see a small shadow moving across the ground. You think it's a ball someone threw, so you look up to catch it, only to realize it is a bird.

right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

touching something (like a crack in a wall) and then thinking to yourself that your the only person thats ever touched it..

have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

When no one is home, I poop with the door open, just because I can.

Sniff or tap to a rhythm to some sort of beat I composed in my head...

Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

Scratch my asshole and always judge it to be okay to continue my day, no matter how bad the smell.

I can understand (insert language) but for the life of me I can't speak it.

Have to have a certain light in the bathroom to poop. Also, nobody can be anywhere near me.

Feeling stupid when you're watching a funny movie and you laugh by yourself. So you look around and stop laughing.

in burgers, you eat until you have only a few bites left, then you eat the bun and then the insides

Pull your headphones away from your ear when you're listening to music to see if it's too loud.

Whenever I hear a baby or a young child scream very loud, I imagine that their head will explode.

right click refresh on desktop. Repeat

play Simpsons episodes in my head...way too often

When someone close to me sadly passes on and later when I am listening to the radio if I hear a song that sounds suitable to that moment I kind of make that our song if that makes sense to any of you

When playing a game you refer to the kid you don't know as "kid" - ar2

I watch American football with the sound down low because the announcers are always trying to tell us that we didn't see what we just saw when the referees make bad calls

when you're fapping and thinking about someone, you either get a text from them moments later, or stop thinking about them because you feel like they are reading your mind.

Sometimes I turn on my bedroom fan at night just so i can use heavier blankets.

When I'm at home alone, I feel like people are watching me through my windows, so I act completely civil.

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.