I love myself, my wife, the threesomes, and I STILL spend time with you! Moral: Which must mean YOURE WINNER! AND STUFF! Either that or you are a sad fuck, cant argue...

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The older I get the more honest I get

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Write something down here so that it seems like you think its normal when your actually really paranoid that its not.

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Playing a sad song that talks about your current situation and then looking in the mirror or out the window pretending you are in a sad music video.

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Sometimes I feel that my reflection in the mirror will stop doing what I'm doing and either jump out and grab me, start telling me about her reflected life, or give me a mission to free her from her mirror life.

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Flush the toilet before you finish peeing.

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accidently sleep on my arm and it falls asleep

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right after I turn the shower off I jump up and down to get rid of the extra water all over me...

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A mix of Slenderman and Herobrine would be the ideal husband for me. >:)

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have fake conversations that might happen in the future...so ur prepared

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Read things from this page and think to self: "Thank God, I thought I was the only one."

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Thinking that out there, on this earth in a lost city, there is an awesome clone of you.

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Tryng to run away from, or at least be faster than my shadow.

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A lot of times I believe things I see or things that happen are "signs" of something.

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i feel all weird and sad when i thing about my old belongings.

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When sitting or laying down, tell yourself to get up in your head but see how long your body can resist your commands, and end up yelling at yourself to move in your head while still sitting/laying down.

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I find it easiest to read or study while sitting on the toilet.

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I mean Diana Ross.

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When I'm walking on pavement or tiles I always make patterns, e.g stepping on every second tile, stepping a certain amount of times on each bit of pavement

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When I get in the car I look in the backseat for monsters or psychopathic killers and as I am turning to check I say out loud 'Oh, maybe my book is in the backseat, let me check' so the monster or killer doesn't know I'm really looking back there for them. That way they might not kill me.

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Poking my self under the covers just to not falleth asleepeth (t -_-)zzzzzz

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wipe your armpit and then sniff it to see how bad you smell

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Put the towel near the shower so that you can stand on it and not get the floor wet

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cover myself in vaseline and roll around on the floor pretending im a slug

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Things You Think Only You Do

A collection of things you think only you do. Go ahead and confess. You probably aren't the only one.